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Feeling hurt

Posted , 5 users are following.

Tired_teddy
Tired_teddy

So my partner has been off with me since I got my official diagnosis. I was saying I felt really tired tonight. He said ye I'm tired too - I'll just give up working too. 

0 likes, 13 replies

13 Replies

  • Carinaeta
    Carinaeta Tired_teddy

    Posted

    Ouch.

    If you're both tired now's not the time to discuss, but you should probably have a chat about how you both feel another time. He needs to look online and maybe speak to your doctor with you so he's more involved and more informed in how this affects you. There's a difference in giving up work and not being able to work because of a disability, everyone on this forum knows that. Sending supportive vibes xxxxx

  • tiswas24537
    tiswas24537 Tired_teddy

    Posted

    MY husband treated me like sh*t for years , making just those kind of remarks which damm well hurt ,and only go to making you feel depressed and more ill.

    and isolated

    . i started to chat to a guy on you tube about memories of the 70s music etc, then we started to text each other ,this made my husband sit up and notice what he had been dpong to me , because i was honest with him i didnt do it behind his back , he has totaly changed towards me cant do enough for me , and i am milking it .

    , i am getting gifts ,and massagers ,and his even got a water bed on trial to see if it is more comfortable for me and paid the extra for duel mattress ,super stable so it moves only a little but not to much because i would proberly feel sick .if it moved loads.

    i told him that he drove me to it which he did , and that i am not stopping texting because i dont trust him not to go back to how he was ,his excepted it .maybe you need to do something along those lines . or just tell them to go .doors open . scary i know . but you have to take control hun or like me you will become a victim. i thought back and have come out on top . and im sure you can to .  HAVE you tried magnesium supplement for better energy ,along with q10, and maybe b12. .they do help .

    • janet01833
      janet01833 tiswas24537

      Posted

       Tina...I started taking q10, b12, magnesium and started bruising VERY easily. Do you experience this? Its been two wks but I do feel better! Going to the doc in an hr to get my thyroid levels checked. They wouldnt do it before even though my mother had hers removed because it was enlarged. Ive been bugging them and finally they said theyll do it. 
    • tiswas24537
      tiswas24537 janet01833

      Posted

      iv been taking b12 and q10 very yrs on and of and i hardley bruise at all

      last yr i broke my nose and a bone in my hand after falling in the street hardly saw any bruising just a very slight tinge no black eyes or anything.

      so maybe theres something eles going on .people who bennifit most from b12 are people in the older age bracket and people who have had stomach surgery . if i was you  i would stop one at a time for a couple of weeks and see if not taking them stops u from bruising .but dont stop all at once other wise u wont know which one if any are causing the problem

    • janet01833
      janet01833 tiswas24537

      Posted

      Thanks Tina, I was just seen by doc she said if its any of those pills it would  the q10 but then she saw my bruises and suspects something else. she did blood work and checked thyroid levels. Ill know results soon. It does seem to help so Im going to stay on it for now. I have had a very serious blood clot and PE in the past so a little blood thinning wont hurt (if thats whats doing it)confused Thanks again, janet
    • tiswas24537
      tiswas24537 janet01833

      Posted

      hi janet do you have a craving for salt or like a lot of salt .

      my sisterinlaw  has cravings for salt shehas a condition linked to this. where she looks like shes been beaten up after the tinnest bump . cant remember what its called now but if you do have a love of salt might be worth looking up on line conditions that causes bruising.

    • janet01833
      janet01833 tiswas24537

      Posted

      Thats strange Ive never heard of that. I do eat more salt than i should but no more than usual. I drink diet pop which has alot of salt. Guess Ill continue waiting on what the blood results say....I feel like sh#$% today but ive missed two and a half days of work this wk. If i miss today I might be fired. This syndrome is costing me sooo much.
    • tiswas24537
      tiswas24537 janet01833

      Posted

      well that just one more reason for avoiding diet drinks i have always avoided them because of the artificial sweetners ,but i must admit i never thought they would have salt in  as well so healty yeah right.

      confused

  • JulieBadger
    JulieBadger Tired_teddy

    Posted

    Emotions are a difficult thing.  You have them and so does he.  I would recommend telling him when a certain comment hurts but only when you are not feeling those upset emotions right then.  Remind him that you would prefer to be working and when you are well enough you will be returning to a level of working, but only when you are well enough.

    You've only just been diagnosed and emotions are raw on both sides.  When he returns to work and you find a routine that will help.

    I find it hard when my hubby says he is tired, cos I know his tiredness is a passing thing unlike mine.  He deserves his feelings to be recognised too and suggestions to be made by you on how he could feel better.  He made the emotional mistake of comparing his to yours in a dramatic way.  I would recommend saying "why don't you have a little nap or go out in the fresh air, that will help your tiredness pass.  Don't worry you don't have to give it your work".  If he comes back with 'oh, so your tiredness means you can give up work but I can't' explain " you're lucky, I've got no choice cos my tiredness won't go away.  I'd love to be working and I will do once I'm well enough".

    I try to understand when others say they are tired or something hurts.  It's difficult at times, but they have feelings too. x

  • Tired_teddy
    Tired_teddy

    Posted

    Thanks everyone. He has apologised but it I still feel upset. I've told him I feel bad enough being off work without him rubbing it in. I guess I'm just feeling over emotional as I'm in a lot of pain at the moment.  Sorry I'm not replying individually I'm just too bloody tired xxx hope your all feeling ok today xx 
    • JulieBadger
      JulieBadger Tired_teddy

      Posted

      If you're anything like me you will frequently feel bad not being able to work / or not work as much as you used to.  It's possibly always going to be a hurtful subject for you when anyone brings it up, or you tell someone you don't work.  It will get easier.  He's been showing his support by being with you at this hard time and he has said sorry. Keep talking on this forum so you don't feel lonely x
  • Flowerlady
    Flowerlady Tired_teddy

    Posted

    Hi Tired Teddy

    So sorry to hear your partner is being off with you. There are plenty more fish in the sea, as the saying goes...I wish people could understand what we all are going through. I am on my own all week, till my husband get home for a day and a half. He does do things for me though. You have got us lot on here to keep you company..Regards...Anne...

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