Feeling of swaying and falling during anxiety

Hello.

I have this feeling of swaying like I'm on a boat when I have anxiety. It also comes with this feeling of falling or suddenly dropping trough the floor.

I've had anxiety and depression for years now. My first medication started when I was 13-14. I'm 23 now.

During the years I've been on various medication. I've been mostly prescribed Anti-psychotic and SSRI/SNRI -drugs.

My symptoms of swaying started when I was 18. My anxiety at the time was off the roof and I somehow dwelled into this state that resembled a psychosis in my opinion. The doctor diagnosed me with psychotic depression.

During that time period of being very anxious I suddenly started having these symptoms. There were times when I lost my ability to walk for example because of the feeling of swaying and being constantly off-balance.

So the psychiatric doctor gave me this diagnosis of psychotic depression but they couldn't even tell what was the cause of my swaying. At the hospital they just tested that can I stand straight for example and just tested my heart-rate if some sort of blood pressure issues could've been the case.

It obviously wasn't. I do have high blood pressure though but I believe it's genetic. I don't have any heart issues and I don't think theres been much in my family.

So it's not a regular type of dizziness that I'm experiencing and I believe that I can separate these from each other.

Once I saw the doctor at 18 years old I was institutionalized and treated at at a hospital. I started taking all these meds again and somehow over the time my anxiety went away and I was capable of living a more normal life.

Once my (as the doctors described) psychotic behaviour started going away so did the swaying. I could walk without leaning on the walls and having to stop to lay on the ground and then start again.

The doctors described my walking as similar to claudication that a long-time alcoholic who has drunk their cerebellum to mush has. The symptoms were so bad I had to use a weelchair at the hospital because I felt so unsure about walking.

So years go by and I've had anxiety in different forms troughout these 5 years of my life. I have some pretty clear memories of being off-balance here and there and they have always been the cause of high anxiety.

So when these feelings come there hasn't appeared any other changes in my life compared to being in-balance than my anxiety. That gives me the benefit of the doubt that it's anxiety-related or that anxiety is the main cause of it; when I have high anxiety the feeling of swaying and falling comes again.

I've also noticed that I always get these symptoms during a period of long term anxiety. So it's not just a random feeling that comes and goes ever so often but more like when it does come it's there to stay and is hand-in-hand with the anxiety.

So long story even longer: after 5 years of the symptoms having to put me to the state of being unable to walk I have the same feeling of being on a boat again.

This has been going on for roughly about a year now but I feel that my anxiety is maybe slightly less extreme than back when I had this for the first time.

So that is positive and I feel like my train of thought is clearer because of it.

But it's still no joyride for me.

The fact that my mind is less foggy and that I can think clearer now has also led me to be worried and concerned about this in a different way than I was in my state of psychotic depression.

I feel worried that this is not going away. I have very high anxiety that has been building up along with the swaying symptoms now for over a year. I understand that I might not have these issues when im not anxious but that can take a long time knowing my history of mental health disorders.

I can function somehow at the moment. I eat my food, I feed my cat, I go to sleep ect. But I'm frustrated, anxious and in loss of energy living my life like this.

And I feel like the worst thing is that when I went to the doctor (for the 4th or 5th time this year) talking about my problems she did the same thing as always; she listened to my heart for a second or two and told me to eat something salty. So when I describe my symptoms the doctor is treating me as if I had low blood pressure or just regular dizziness...

I have propral and mirtazapine at the moment but haven't started eating those regularly atleast yet. I felt like the mirtazapine (15mg) could've helped because I have been on it before so it's not an completely unknown drug for me so I asked the doctor that because she or any other doctor can't even spot the problem let alone treat it somehow. So i took a 15mg one night and had an anxiety attack and pretty much felt terrible the next day. I took one 7mg the next day and continued feeling like s**t so I layed off of that.

I would really want to know if any of you reading this have had the same type of symptoms and I would like to know what has helped you? I'm in a place of high anxiety right now and any help would be precious.

I feel hopeless living with this and the public healthcare can't help me at all. I went to a private doctor also and they couldn't help me at all either.

So I guess I'm left at my own devices here. If any of you won't response of course.

This was a long post and I apologize for the possible misspellings and such, english isn't my first language and not even my second.

0 likes, 8 replies