Feeling off today, sad.

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Hi. Just needed some support today. It's cloudy and rainy and I'm sure from yard work yesterday. It was bright and sunny then. Went to bed about 11:30 on a half dose of trazadone and wine up at 5 am. Feeling a bit anxious. I've been back on brand name Effexor XR 75 for several months, and had lots of tough days in the past. I'm hoping that's behind me now. But today is reminding me that maybe not. Just don't feel it today. I'm an really tired of stating focused and busy and battling this s**t. I'm also menopausal, so I'm sure that's part of it, if not a big part of it.

Saw my therapist yesterday and she's very happy with my progress. Yesterday was a good day. I still have those things in my head like, winter will be here, the days will be shorter.... What will I do then? I hate the winter. I'm trying not to think about it because I can't control it. I used to love the fall, but now it's just another time before winter that I dread. Summer isn't even started really, and I'm worried about winter? Why can't I just be thankful for what's in front of me? That's what I try to do every day all day long. It's exhausting.

Anyway, I'm babysitting my granddaughters tomorrow. They are a handful and a joy! Please pray for me that this episode doesn't last.

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8 Replies

  • Posted

    hi//  i had a hole letter here and my computer shut off..  dam.. i am with you girlfriend...WINTER ... really..  i think the same things..  i will right cha back tomorrow.. thanks..  enjoy your grandaughters!!!!!!!!!!   and the hormone thing oh yea.  so i might privite message you tomorrow..  
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    • Posted

      When will it end?!? I'm having a better day today. Hot flashes galore, and with each one, anxiety. So the whole mind over matter thing is hard work, and I'm getting there. I just tell myself that it's hormones and push it out of my mind. Yesterday, not so much. So today is like an anxiety hangover. I've endured this long what's another 5-10 years with menopause????🙄😤😩

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  • Posted

    Hey Tammy. Try living in the moment. Never mind the winter. You cant control winter but you can control what you do now. Think and stay positive!!!  Go for a walk with your grandkids. Or play with them outside. Do things that will keep you on a good front. Try meditating also. Or yoga. All these will help you. 
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    • Posted

      Thanks John. I do that and more. Yesterday was a struggle. Today I woke up with anxiety, but I know it'll pass. I'll be busy today for sure and it's sunny, so I'll be playing with the kids and building puzzles, etc. I really work hard at staying in the moment, but there are times when everything just sits there in the back of your mind and nags. It's during the quiet moments when they sometimes turn ugly and come to the forefront. It'll be okay, I always with through it. Thanks for caring to respond! Just a crappy day yesterday.

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  • Posted

    Some days are just plain crappy Tammy. Thats what my Dr tells me anyhow. Just have to work through it. Enjoy youre day with youre g’kids and smile a lot.........
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    • Posted

      😊😊😊😊😊

      Thank you John, I took a big walk with the baby and the dog, up two huge hills, still a little outta sorts, but the sun is out and I have a big happy family, my faith, my husband!!! It'll all be fine eventually. Have a great weekend and thank you for you kind words and support! God bless you!

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  • Posted

    Oh Tammy, I am so sorry.  Is it wrong to say I find comfort in hearing someone else use the terminology  that you feel "OFF" ".  Its so hard to describe those days when they happen,...…...and even with meds, THEY DO HAPPEN.   Worry is such a terrible thing.  Its like ' Why cant I just enjoy the NOW and worry about later...…..LATER.   Or as the Bible says, In Matthew 6:34 

    Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

    I'm not great at remembering scripture, but man if that one doesn't fit.   I hope your day with your grandkids was wonderful.  These OFF days may always happen, but I pray they are few and far between for  you (and me)

    Take care

     

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    • Posted

      Thank you so much for that. I read the Bible I go to church I'm a devout Catholic. I find scripture so so comforting. My anxiety was there this morning but I just put it in God's hands so I can play and enjoy my granddaughters. God has a greater plan for me than I have for myself so I have to completely trust him to do his work.

      Yeah you know it's hard to describe to anybody that you don't feel like yourself entirely. It's like waking up from a bad dream that you can't shake for the rest of the day it just nags at you. Sometimes it's anxiety sometimes it's just fear of having anxiety. But today was a good day after all and when I was done babysitting I had plans to go out with a bunch of girlfriends so that was fun.

      You know whoever is reading this besides you I hope everybody knows that I pray for them and for all the anxiety and depression sufferers out there. I can't imagine what it would be like if I didn't have my family or a support network of strangers on the internet that is going through exactly what I go through. Everyone here has been a blessing to me.

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