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Feeling really low at the moment

Posted , 5 users are following.

mark97730
mark97730

Ive suffered from depression for the last 20 years and at the moment I'm feeling so low xmas was a bit of a nightmare I'm on 3 lots of tablets ive had many differant types of counciling and I'm still in the same place . Lately I've had lots of thoughts of suicide and how sometimes I actually look forward to death I know this is wrong but I'm so tired of this and so lonely I just feel there is so much missing from my life.

3 likes, 14 replies

14 Replies

  • celtics
    celtics mark97730

    Posted

    hi mark im sorry to here how you are feeling have you every thought of getting a second opinion as to how you procede from here ! the suicidal thought are bad as ive suffered from them a lot at times ! have you mentioned this to your doctor ? have you tried the samaritans whem you need someone to talk ! are your family.aware of how you feel please find someone you can confide in as soon as you can till you can get back to your doctor ! good luck and i wish.you well david !
    • mark97730
      mark97730 celtics

      Posted

      thank you for your reply it's nice to get a second opinion 

      thanks Mark

    • celtics
      celtics mark97730

      Posted

      mark i hope you get the help you need believe me. its always better talking to someone who understands what your are going through ! ive been on several different meds and still felt suicidal but with.back up from my wife and family.whilst the depressions still bad im getting help to manage it better ! good luck david
  • patricia49047
    patricia49047 mark97730

    Posted

    Hi Mark. Sorry you are feeling like you are in a bad place. Please remember this....people out there do care. I care. I can see how you feel that way, I've been in serious pain for 15 years now and can't do a lot of things I used to do and still would like to do. I have bad days, too. I've never told anyone but I have thought about giving up at times, wondering if  it would just end. But, I just pull myself up and try my best to go on. I do have family who I know loves me, but it's still hard. I'm sure you have the same. Try to focus on others and think about the good parts of your life and how much better off you are than some. You have lots to be thankful for if you think about it...we live a free life, for the most part, and have what we need. Find the joy in something, maybe a pet for companionship, or reading to escape reality for awhile, loose yourself in a good book or television show. Talk to someone, just a friend might help. Hang tough and don't give up. We are here!! From a friend in the USA. 

    Patricia

    • mark97730
      mark97730 patricia49047

      Posted

      Thank you Patricia I will call the drs in the morning I am trying to distract myself ive watched about 7 episodes of Downton Abbey thanks again it's nice to know people care enough to take time and write back.

      many thanks again Mark

       

    • celtics
      celtics patricia49047

      Posted

      patrica you are a great help to people on here you have a lot of advice  to give its the first time ive came across  you and your advice to mark was great ! im sorry to your in a lot of pain i wish you well in getting better ! hope you had a good christmas and a happy new year ! god bless you david
    • patricia49047
      patricia49047 mark97730

      Posted

      Glad you are finding some distractions, Mark. Anything that will help! Let me know how it goes with the doctors, and how you are doing! 

      Your Friend,

      Patricia

    • patricia49047
      patricia49047 celtics

      Posted

      Hello David! Thanks for the blessings and well wishes, sure can use them! As we are beginning a new year I'd like to wish everyone good health and happiness. Together we are strong and can get the help to overcome our problems and health issues! It's good to know someone is listening and willing to offer advice. We are not alone! God Bless. 

      Patricia

  • marie31094
    marie31094 mark97730

    Posted

    Hi Mark,

    I know how you feel as I have suffered for several years now from major depression and feeling very low. Christmas is always a bad time for us sufferers and people dont understand why we dont feel as wonderful as they do when they see the lights and the christmas tree, but we dont. Please dont consider suicide,,,its never the answer and have you thought that it could be a side effect from the meds you are taking which is actually making you feel this way? Perhaps a chat to your doctor may help if you feel like this and I know you say that councelling hasnt done much.. it didnt for me either if Im honest, as you only have a limited amount of time when you are there and it only scratches the surface anyway. PLEASE do not feel lonely...there are a lot of us out here who feel in exactly the same way you do, so you are never on your own. I know that sometimes when Im out, I wonder if anyone else that I see feels the same way that I do. ..its just that depression cannot be seen by others unlike a broken leg or arm, which is something a lot of people just understand as being sick or ill. If you want to write to me then please do so...I may not be much help, but I DO understand what you feel like and what the place is like where you are now. 

    Take care

    X

  • anne240
    anne240 mark97730

    Posted

    Mark I know just how you feel.  I am like you, and have had depression for over 20 years.  Like you say, a lot missing.  I have lost a great deal because of depression, but I battle on.  Not much else we can do.  I try to help myself as much as possible.

    I have been on many different anti depressants over those years, seen many psychiatrists and counsellors.  Taken overdose, been in pshyciatric hospital.  I had a bit of a breakdown over Christmas, and have not picked myself up yet. 

    I thought I was doing well, as trying to manage without medication, but today tired and tearful.  But thenm, tomorrow is another day.  That is why I keep going.  Ups and downs.  Some days better than others. 

    I am lonely, live alone, with a cat.  I do have things to go to when I am up to it.  Started a voluntary job, and now feel I will have to let them down as I not able to cope.  I did so want to feel useful, but this depression  gets in the way once again.

    Mark I know life is difficult.  Have you family and friends.  Do you work?  I am retired now, but had to go on Invalidity Benefit as could not work due to depression.  Years ago now.  I'm still here, still battling.

    Take care, and I do hope things improve.  Please don't consider suicide.

  • celtics
    celtics mark97730

    Posted

    hi mark youve really been through.the wringer ! please. what ever you do please try and stop thinking of suicide as having had suicidal thoughts its not going to help you get well have you a family member you can confide in ! try phoning samaritans they wont judge you and might be able.to point.you.in the right direction to get further help good luck and hope you get well soon david !
  • mark97730
    mark97730

    Posted

    Hi everyone Mark here just to give you a follow up ive been to the drs she has given me some mirtazapine as well and trying to sort out some more help many thanks for all your support it does help

    Mark x

    • celtics
      celtics mark97730

      Posted

      hi mark  im so glad you went.to.your doctor and got the help you.needed good luck with the new tablets just remember they can take several weeks to start to.work  please take care and we all.wish youmthe best stay in touch  david
  • marie31094
    marie31094 mark97730

    Posted

    Hi Mark,

    Im really glad that you went to the doctors and got them to listen to you. You needed some help very badly and Im so happy that you went and they gave you something to help. Remember, there are a lot of very nice people on here in your same situation and Im pretty sure that anyone would help you if you needed to talk, But good for you seeing the doc...please bear in mind that the tablets may take some time to work, so dont give up hope! We are all thinking about you out here and Im sure that anyone would chat to you if you needed it,

    Take care x

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