Feeling very suicidal.

Posted , 10 users are following.

I have been depressed for a long time but never bothered to do anything about it. 3 weeks ago I went to my doctor and she prescribed me Citalopram 20mg to be taken daily. I went back after 2 weeks and told her it made me worse. I've been taking 25mg Sertraline (to be upped to 50mg starting tomorrow) and I'm not seeing myself get any better. Recently I've started to have panic attacks which is why she gave me Sertraline. All I think about is how much better off I would be not being here, suicide seems like the only option, I wouldn't have to feel like this anymore. I don't ever feel happy, I either feel completely empty and numb or extremely down and suicidal. I don't know what to do any more. 

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  • Posted

    Also, I don't like to leave the house anymore. I've been signed off sick from work for 3 weeks and I'm dreading going back.
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    • Posted

      Hi Danielle. 

      I can understand all your going through. On a really dark downer I feel like ending it all too. But I try and talk myself out of it. Try and keep busy which can be hard. If your not ready to go back to work tell your doctor as going back too soon will make matter worse I know I went back to soon and ended up in hospital. But talk to us. We all know what your going through. Some people Bury there heads in sand where depression is concerned. Don't do anything to yourself talk to us. About anything ok 

      Vera

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  • Posted

    sorry to hear you suffering so badly over this.  I should try and ride it out if you can to see the benefits of the increased dosage.  I hope you feel better in a few weeks after the tablets become effective.  Be patient there are  a lot of people who come on the forum feeling just as you do.

    Richard

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  • Posted

    Did the suicidal thoughts and not wanting to leave the house happen after your started the citalopram and sertraline? The same thing happened to me on both drugs.
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  • Posted

    Hi Danielle,

    I've only just joined this site but felt I had to reply. I myself and my mum have both been on citalopram and completely understand this first initial feeling you have. I know that currently nothing will make you feel better and it may be like you are in the middle of a thick fog. Please know that these feelings do start to go away and you will gradually feel less suicidal. Citalopram initially heightens these feelings but they do start to fade slightly, it's a case of 'riding them out' which sounds dreadful but that was all I could do. It may really help you to talk to some one if that's possible? X

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  • Posted

    Hi Danielle, I was very suicidal 2 weeks ago and my nurse adviced me to get out more to take up a new hobby,do something i really enjoy, I find it hard as I still get anxious when im out but I force myself to go for a short walk every day even thou Im not really enjoying it,is there something in life u do really enjoy doing?
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