Fighting of the demons in my head

Posted , 5 users are following.

Last so many weeks I haven't been myself people told me might have depression but I didn't read the signs or listened to them now I letting myself down after so many years without trying to kill myself got back to square one thinking I want to kill myself then I don't want to get the help before its to late, got a doctors appointment on 12 june I think it will to late save myself.

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    Maisie, how are you letting yourself down? If you made a mistake, you learn from it. Don't be so hard on yourself, just learn from your past actions, good or bad. You could be making a bigger deal than what your family and friends think. Talk to them and let them know how feel. You could find that it's not so bad.

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  • Posted

    congratulations on taking the first step to getting help.  There is no reason to suffer when there is help for depression.  You just have to see a professional and work together to find the right meds or therapy to get your depression under control.

    Are you saying this is something new you have been struggling with?  Depression most of the time is a temporary situation even if you don't get help sometimes it goes away but if it is affecting your life or you are having suicidal thoughts, then for sure seek professional help.  


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    • Posted

      I had depression and suicidal thoughts in past while I was in high school but past couple of weeks I haven't been feeling myself and now I have really bad depression and getting suicidal thoughts just now I half of me whats to get the help then other half I don't want to live anymore I give up on myself

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    • Posted

      Hi maisie61598

      We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologies for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.

      If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.

      Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here:, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.

      If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.

      Kindest regards


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  • Posted

    Hi, Muffins,

    This is funny, because my cat's name is Muffins.  Thats besides the point, what I'm saying is is that thing will get better - been there done that.  Let me tell you something that changed my life.  I was zonked out on antidepressants for years.  Since I was 15-20.  Not worth it -- don't start, I beg you.  Getting off that s**t was so difficult to the point where I had to detox at home for 3 weeks.  I lost jobs and multiple roommate opportunities while i was in California for 2 1/2 years.  I ended up in a Psych Ward because i wanted to "throw myself out a window".  Well long story with that one, i was just being dramatic, and I was abandoned in Vegas on my own from someone that was supposed to be a friend.  5 hours away from home (Cali) and MN was states away.  Well, my dad stayed there in the Luxor for a whole week until I was dismissed.  I saw everything you can imagine being somewhere like that... in Vegas - and I'm making this as light as i can be, because this isn't about me. This is about you.  After loosing my jobs, roommates, family members, and my dignity, I learned to be sober (ish) and very clean eating (Detoxing - getting off of pill popping for my sanity) I found serenity.  My advice to you, friend, is that eating well (organic, vegan, clean eating - whatever), does make a difference.  Eat well, workout, and treat yourself great.  Treat your body like the person you're made to be, and you WILL notice a difference.  My family tells me otherwise but they never left the midwest.  I've been all over, and i'm going to tell you right now (also living in the Med City town ((Mayo Clinic)) and also regarding my mother being a psych nurse as well as old roommates as well as myself being in the field -- medications have never been proven to work (they are in the testing process).  With that being said, with personal experience, I feel much better with the natural stuff.  Yes, i have became a huge fan of the Chinese/Eastern Medicine practices dealing with that, and I will most definitely continue to learn due to my previous experiences.

    In other words, let me know if you need some guidance;  always here.



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  • Posted

    Please, don't wait for the appointment, go to the hospital and talk to someone. They can help you to maintain and balance your thoughts and your actions. Death is so final. Yes, problems and some situations in our lives are very hard to deal with. But we all eventually get through it. Life is so precious.

    If you like, I will give you my number and we can talk .I am praying for you.

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