1. Community
  2. Mental health
  3. Anxiety Disorders

First therapy session made me feel really bad, I'm scared of talking to my therapist -what can I do?

Posted , 4 users are following.

m10349
m10349

Hi Everyone,

I'd like to ask for help: I feel that the therapist isn't suitable for me.

I've been having anxiety issues for a long time but the last year has given me too much to cope with. Being closed up/away from society and the world for about 15 years, separated 7 months ago, living with my 2 daughters and experiencing too much fears over pretty much anything, I am too exhausted. No self-confidence, no self-esteem, no friends, no family around, I feel very vulnerable and fragile.

I expected help from a professional, with acceptance and compassion, specifically on the very first session - apparently, we for going through my problems listed/noted in my assessment, I had months ago.

I was really nervous, worried about the phone appointment (I have phone, social, general anxiety, and probably a few more other issues) - I've been out of hope for so long - and I dared to sense a little bit of hope from having a therapy. Instead: I've felt not accepted, judged, cornered, told off for some of my beliefs and genuine feelings/thoughts. All my trust's gone. I was in tears for the rest of the day, and deeply regretted I ever asked for help. I am scared, I don't want to talk to this therapist again. Please, help me: what can I do? Can I and how to ask for another therapist? Would I be understood and offered different help or I should just not ask for any more help, but suffer silently? (I consider the latter)

I was also pressured that I need to have video appointments, too, when I mentioned few times, that I'd not like that. I said one of my points, that I don't trust internet security, the therapist held on to this and told me repeatedly (3-4 times) that: why am I so special that someone would spy on me. Exactly the opposite, I feel I am no-one and nothing, and it was just a part of my thoughts about it...

I'm afraid of losing my place (I've been on a long waiting list) and opportunity to receive help (or do I still want it???), if I say I'm not able to continue this. I didn't come to feel beaten and punished, I've been putting myself down for too long and I'd like a more compassionate approach.

I've tried medications, too, before, they didn't help; and now I feel really really hopeless and terrified here.

I'd appreciate any advice or help, please. Thank you in advance.

1 like, 4 replies

4 Replies

  • pedro89431
    pedro89431 m10349

    Posted

    Hey there ,

    I also just started with a Psychologist. Im a 29 year old male and my health anxiety has been insane fkr the past month. I was told to speak with a therapist but my primary doctor opted for a psychologist. Every therapist has their own way of doing things and maybe your therapist is using the a specific technique. Maybe its what you need and maybe its not, anyway I wouldnt stop talking to the therapist, I would personally just look for a new one if you really dont feel comfortable.

    • m10349
      m10349 pedro89431

      Posted

      Hi,

      Thank you for your reply. Just to mention: it is a CBT therapist. I've had some previous experiences with psychologists and therapists but never had anything so badly effecting me.

      I wish you all the best on your journey to feel better.

  • jan34534
    jan34534 m10349

    Edited

    you have the right to ask for another therapist. I have done that a few times and finally found the right one for me. he’s very compassionate and trustworthy. just tell them that you want to find a counselor that is a little more low-keyed. remember, they are working for you!

    You just might not be a good fit for each other if the therapist made you feel badly. therapists and counselors need to make the patient feel comfortable and the patient should feel like they can trust the therapist.

    dont let one counselor make you give up. you need to fight for yourself so that you can feel better. That’s just that one counselors style. You can find one that’s right for you. Never ever give up on yourself.

    • m10349
      m10349 jan34534

      Posted

      Thank you for the reassurance and encouragement. I appreciate it.

Back to top

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.