For anyone that may offer real advice
Posted , 5 users are following.
My depression is mostly caused by others, I imagine it's the same with most of us, however I've recently found my self toying with the idea of cutting out the parasites that cause this feeling I've completely removed them from my life but feel the urge for revenge so compelling (like it will some how cure my depression if they pay the ultimate price for placing me in such low points I tried to kill myself so many times ( seems the powers that be are determined to make me suffer) and who says to kill is wrong? What because our society has decided it well mammels kill each other they have done for years infact we wouldn't be here at all if our species was as civilised as we are now!! Now I feel I either need help with coming to terms with what's gone on or deal with the thoughts somehow it's become scary as I can rationalize and justify taking revenge has anyone ever had anything like this
1 like, 8 replies
mike36008
Posted
In addition I have thought of the time you serve but here's the thing what's the difference in in prison now metaphorically speaking I'm alone and stay in my flat I've nothing in my life but pain and the gym so not sure a jail cell is enough of a deterrent
hypercat mike36008
Posted
Other people can't cause our depression! Yes they certainly don't help but we all meet horrible people in life and saying they have caused it gives them power they don't have.
Whatever the causes you need to own it and take responsibility for your own feelings and not blame them on others.
I am aware you will not like this response but I presume you are looking for advice. Killing or harming someone is not the way to go about it. The best revenge is to live a happy productive life and show them they haven't won.
mike36008 hypercat
Posted
Thankyou I'm not sure if agree with you on other people don't cause depression for example for ever action there is indeed a reaction like if I called someone stupid everyday then surly they would eventually start to believe that and probably would develop with less confidence ? Is that not causing an outcome within somebody else I think everyone should be held responsible for there words and actions I don't did like your answer it's your opinion and I respect that and thankyou for it
It's disgusting how some ppl can go round doing saying and acting on things with no regard for the people or impact it can have on a person's life without being held accountable and with no fear of ramification this is not acceptable in my opinion
hypercat mike36008
Posted
Your reaction to it would depend entirely on your self worth but don't forget you do have the power to answer back as it's not a one way street. If we are talking parents doing this when we are children well many of us have been there including me. But it is still up to you to own your feelings and deal with them in a productive way.
I agree with you about how some people are awful but there is little we can do about it except keep clear of all toxic people as much as we can. Also some people are narcasissts and have no conscience but again we can't do anything about it. I will give you an example.
I live in a block of flats and one of my neighbours carer keeps having a go at me about my cat and making insinuations about me in a very nasty way. It doesn't bother me coz only the truth hurts and there is no truth at all in what she says. It annoys me coz I don't want to be bothered with idiots. She is just a skank with tattoos and how she behaves says far more about her than me. See what I am talking about? I choose my reaction to her instead of letting her lies upset me. This is what I am talking about.
You need to work on your self esteem and assertiveness skills as this will stand you in much bette stead than thinking of revenge and ending up in prison. Oh don't get me wrong there have been people who has been awful with me and I have a fantasy of getting a gun and killing them. I know I would never do it though but it is quite a normal reaction.
I hope this has helped a bit. x
valerie01412 mike36008
Posted
Yes I deal with this every day, what my therapist calls ruminating thoughts which I can't get rid of. My depression is made worse because I cannot forgive the people involved but I know that unless I can forgive them this hatred will eat me up. I could not kill them that would just make things worse, I am also depressed at actions which I wish SO much I hadn't made and I am finding forgiving myself the hardest of all/ They say that revenge is a dish best served cold, I take one day, one hour at a time and wish things were different but they will never be and I have to accept that.
mike36008 valerie01412
Posted
Thank you so much for sharing that I'm the same I guess I've never been one for hurting anyone just sick of being the one that's hurt all the time
I wasn't sure whether it safe to tell a therapist or doctor about my feelings and ideas the stigma of mental health is still very strong and the thought of being put away for my thoughts is far to scary
hikiaru mike36008
Posted
Hey, mike36008
I´ve had thoughts of killing others, poisoning others etc. it could be someone I know or someone on the street. I´ve told that to my therapists a couple of times, to different ones, and really what they ask me is if i have an Impulse or just the thoughts. So, if it´s an Impulse then it might be more dangerous than just thinking About it, but still the thought of it Needs to be examined, surely. In my case ,I think it stems from loneliness and in that Moment believing I am the only one in pain. That of Course is never true. So I would tell them because then you can also examine the issue behind and work on it. Otherwise it might get worse, no ? And even if they did put you in some place, Maybe it would be because it´s for the best, but at the end of the day, I don´t think you lose.
Take care
valerie01412 mike36008
Posted