Friend's attitude hurts a little

Posted , 19 users are following.

Hi all.  I have a dear friend who is 77, and some years she had PMR in the worst way.  The dr (who is also mine) said she had the highest SED rate he'd ever seen.  She went on Pred. and gradually came down to 5 mg.  She also started eating non inflammatory diet and gluten free diet.  Well, I'm 100 pounds heavier than she is, and I eat fairly healthily (but can hardly exercise), and the PMR won't go down even on 19 mg, which I've tried to get used to this past month with the "dead slow" method you have.  I'm still in pain in my arms and shoulder too too much.

Anyway she called the other day and gave me a lecture on giving up milk, bread, etc. and told me "you won't get well until you try."  Is it really that successful - the diet - or is she just lucky?  

Besides PMR I have fibromyalgia, major depression, and arthritis.  

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  • Posted

    Hi Debbie.

     I have a number of health issues including Osteo Arthritis in spine and multi joints! (Virtually all of em!)  sad Also, diverticular disease which means there are a number of foods I can't eat or it triggers diverticulitis which in turn triggers diarreah and inflammation in base of spine, hips and pelvis. I stick to foods I know will not upset things now as the pain of all that is unbearable. I have tried various things recommended by my sister who is a State Registered Nurse, (retired), who firmly believed diet cures just about everything! rolleyes I just plod on in my own sweet way now! wink I take the pain meds my GP prescribes and some times have really bad days when nothing helps. Like the last week of heatwave here in UK. I among many others who write on here have suffered from the heat badly as it's been very humid with it. Terrific lightening/

    storms last night and 'hey presto' I woke up feeling much better this morning inspite of hearing and watching the storm half the night! rolleyes It's not just diet but a number of things which affect the way we feel including our pain levels in my opinion. Also I'm recovering from shingles which struck at Easter on top of everything else. I'm now 72 and still alive and have all my 'marbles' I think! lol wink  Please keep writing on here, it helps to talk to others who have similar, (not same) problems!!! We are all different as others have said several times on these forums. Maybe your friend was trying to take your mind off pain and give you something else to think about hoping you would feel less depressed then.

    Keep in touch, it's good to talk. biggrin

     Ellie, (Ihurt too)!

    • Posted

      It's a pity one doesn't know how many 'marbles' one has, or even how many one has already lost!😏  I'm nearly 76 and I come out with the strangest things sometimes.
    • Posted

      Hi Constance. I never was good at maths so have no idea how many marbles I started with! lol twisted I do forget things more these days so make notes on a postit pad to remind me. Appointments marked on the calender. I'm still using paper as I don't trust my comp not to go bust when I need to check things like this. I also lose the train of thought at times and give the wrong answers to questions. Apparently I was always a daydreamer at school and did the same thing there! redface So not much change really. I find if I can keep my sense of humour it helps to have a laugh especially at myself! smile
    • Posted

      One of the unlisted side effects of pred.

      Steroid Brain Fog, commonly known as Treacle Brain. wink

    • Posted

      Hi Lodger. I'm not on pred or any other steroids apart from an inhaler and a nasal spray for asthma and allergies. would these have the 'treacle brain' effect too? I haven't been diagnosed with Fibro or PM, just osteo arthritis which preds are not prescribed for here! I do have similar symptoms at times but not yet convinced my GP that I'm not a 'hypochondriac' old lady! I just have have Tramadol,paracetamol, diclofenac for pain and Omeprazole for stomach. They all have side effects, some overlapping, similar to each other. Doc just says take them and put up with side effects or don't and put up with the pain. Murphy's law! confused I must have a naturally 'Treacle brain'!  lol
  • Posted

    Hi DebbieHurts;  I don't have PMR, but do have other conditions, including the Fibro....and have read others' inputs, and agree with all, as they are also going through what you are, and I don't feel that a Big Change in diet will be of a benefit to you, at this stage, as Prednisone can be a culprit, and you Need the Prednisone.....I also agree that the one  important thing for you to address, is the depression, which we ALL go through/have, as It is Hard accepting that we are not who we Used to be, and Pain is a Big causitive of Depession; doesn't make any difference on whoever you were previous to becoming ill, it just goes with the territory.....there are Many ant-depressants on the market that can be taken short-term/long term...but the important thing is, that if you don't find a way to get on top of this terrible "darkness", as another said, you will find yourself Giving up on Everything....I took specific anti-depressants when first found that "there was something wrong, and wanting others to Help me find out what it was"....now I find that my Amitriptylline (which was originally only used for depression), but take for my Fibro pain, also helps with any of my "down"days.....also keep on this Forum site, as the words of advice/support that you will receive, are Very helpful, in Keeping you going....there are foods that can be beneficial for our bodies  (cherries, anything that contains Sulphur/or supplements with same/Epsom Salt baths for the pain of many conditions...this I know as I also have Osteo...and taking Magnesium orally helps with muscles/cramps....if you are concerned re what you should and should not eat, research foods needed/not good etc for all of your probs....but please, as others have said, "what works for one, does not necessarily work for another, as we are all different, including each person's Metabolism"....it is very important that you look after YOU first and foremost............sending you all the support and thoughts that I can, and encouragement on your journey..................Bron
  • Posted

    Thank you all.  I know when I write here, I will get lots of caring support.  I should be writing to you all, too, when you need support.  My friend wants to get together next week, but I think it is not to talk more about food, but to talk about the book I wrote, which she actually read (she really is sweet).  If diet come up, I'm just going to say, it hurts too much to talk about it right now.

    Yes, I take anti depressants and have for years.  I also see a counselor and go to at weekly women's meeting for troubled gals.  My depression is chronic, I think mainly because of the pain of my body right now. It is just throughout my life I've "coped" with hard things by feeling depressed.  Apparently I learned this as a very small child abused by a pedophile uncle, yuck.  Anyway I feel like there is a good kind strong lively happy part of me that has kept me going through education, writing, artwork, work with children in school, marriage, widowhood, and now PMR!  Depression comes along without my permission and squashes me daily.  

    For instance I have tried for a year to lose some weight, and though I havne't gained lately, I haven't lost a pound, mainly because I get so downhearted and give up all the time.  Thanks to all of you for writing to me.

    • Posted

      I think 'yuck' is definitely the wrong word.  I could think of many others!!!!

      I'd want to kill.👿👿

    • Posted

      Debbie, What's the name of your book, and what is it about?
    • Posted

      Debbie

      You are stronger than you give yourself credit for - you coped and are still coping and have a lighter side.

      Life hurls things at us randomly and whatever has come your way you have survived and will survive this, with or without dieting.  Do what is best for you and just treat yourself like the precious person, which you are. 

    • Posted

      Debbie

      I am also interested in your book.  Will they have it on Amazon?

      Audrey

    • Posted

      Debbie i have read your story and the word that comes to my mind is BRAVE, you have overcome so many things and you will do the same to PMR.

      My thoughts are with you and keep writing to us all, this has been my salvation. smilebiggrin

    • Posted

      Hi Debbie, it's good to hear you have coping mechanisms in place. These will get you through this bad time also I'm sure. Please let us know the title of your book and if it's fiction or fact. I find it very difficult to lose weight now I'm older but compromise with eating a 'healthy' diet most of the time and usually don't gain more this way. rolleyes (A treat now and then is OK!) biggrin Take care, X
    • Posted

      Yes, I wish he could have been punished horribly for all the children he hurt!  He is now dead, though.
    • Posted

      Hi Debbie,

      i had to sleep on my decision to share the following.

      i too, had a crazy uncle-Harry.  When I was a little girl between the ages of 3 and 5 I was sexually abused by him as were my sisters and cousins at one point or another.  He lived between the attic and basement of a two family house where I lived until I was 5.  Im sure it had an effect on all of us but it wasn't until years later that the knowledge of it surfaced. As for me,I dealt with it in an extreme way and as a young adult entered a convent-- as the "purity" of the nuns I had known in school appealed to me as well as the feeling of being protected and that was the only appeal because by nature I was very outgoing an fun loving.  

      I also wrote a book titled, Revel Nun which is now out of print and only available as used.  Upon advice of my siblings, Uncle Harry was never mentioned and I regretted that later.

      After I left the convent about I was married 6 months later.  I went for therapy for a short time and perhaps it did help but there are permanent scars which have an effect of who I am today.  I'm a  hypercondriac, anxious at times, extremely fearful of all sorts of things including, cats, driving, birds, etc.  I think what has held me together is my ability to find the humor in my daily life.

      My first husband passed in 2005 and a year later I married my high school friend after meeting at a reunion.  We will be married 9 years later this year and he has become my rock.  He is good and caring both towards me and my two sons with their young families and physical problems.

      i have been truly blessed in that respect.

      I hope I haven't bored you, just thought I would share. I always felt so alone in that respect.

      i look at it this way, uncle Harry was crazy and needed the help he never received.  Can I forgive him?-I don't know, he's dead, who cares.

      Take care and I found your book on Amazon-will be ordering it.

      Audrey

       

    • Posted

      Hi audrey, sorry I missed this post; thank you for writing your story.  Your story is similar, as the abuse I suffered was also done to me at a young age -- up to six years old.  It all came out years and years later when he was caught hurting his little grand-daughter.  Apparently he figured if he did it to the youngest kids, they wouldn't remember and tell on him.  So he confessed after being caught and many things came to light, and all the hints and clues of my and my cousins' lives came clear.  I mean, before I knew for sure, I wrote a whole novel about a girl abused by her uncle!  Somewhere inside I knew even then.  Since I have had a few flash memories, the worst of which is being bathed by him in a tub and he pulling my legs up so my head went under water.  He didn't seem to care about my life even.  Anyway, I don't know if I have forgiveness either, though I wonder what he experienced in his childhood that might have led to his obsession.  Or is it genetic?  I don't know.  I mean, I was abused, but I've never hurt anyone in my life, or thought of it!
    • Posted

      Hi Audrey, I would like to read your book, sounds good.  I see it is Rebel Nun not Revel Nun.

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