frustration with my illness

Posted , 6 users are following.

hello it's only me having a mooch. had a couple of reasonable days up to today not so great, but it's caused by me stressing about things beyond my control, I think. they say stress can kill so how the hell do I stop myself having another heart attack? if no improvement Monday I will see if upping to 60 mgs is an option, if you read this Danillo how is your 60mgs going? hoping the weather allows me to get on the shore tomorrow and I can throw some stones in the sea for Karen haha cheesygrin things quiet on here so I hope that's a sign that everybody who started out with me have turned the corner in their recovery and are well and happy, bless you all. xx

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9 Replies

  • Posted

    aww David I'm sorry to hear this. I know exactly how you feel with the stress! I was so stressed about getting fat that I was raising my cortisol levels contributing to more fat production so I was causing my fear by stressing about it but how can I stop stressing about it when stressing about it causes it and ahhhh! It's just that cycle with these illnesses and it's so unfair! I hope you feel better soon. smile
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    • Posted

      aww bless Pippa yeah there are some vicious circles in this healing process are'nt there? one good thing, perhaps, is the fact that I've undergone scans, xrays, cameras and god knows what recently in attempts to see if there are underlying medical factors within me causing grief, and the stress of that has been quite mega wondering "what if" I need to snap out of this cycle that's a fact, it happens more when I'm housebound, too much time on my hands and an overactive mind = disaster! hahaha but I can laugh at myself, chill that's what we must do....lolcoolcheesygrin
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    • Posted

      I know exactly how you feel, I also had a tonne of tests done to figure out why I was gaining weight and feeling tired all the time, turns out ot was depression and bulimia. It's funny how part of you knows too but at the same time you are terrified it's something else. My mind races at night too, I catastrophise like crazy!! Hopefully one day we'll both get through this smile
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  • Posted

    hi david25160

      i feel for you and for all the fellow peopel who are having a rough time.  i started a new post  a few days ago and felt so humilated by one of the persons respon that i said i willl not be posting anymore.  I just wanted to take the opportunity to thank all of you who have been with me through this journey and i honestlythimk of all of you each and everyday,,,,and send good  thoughts, prayers ect,,,,,  you all have been so supportive and helpful and made me feel  so accepted.  David  I hope keep hoping  that the medicaiton will somehow level things off so you can feel that consistantcy of happiness and peace with life,,,that is my wish for all oof you!!

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  • Posted

    Hi, I hope today has been better, and you have thrown some stones in the sea for me! Its chilly here, but we had some sun, so iv been gardening, makes me feel like I have achieved something, not to mention having the help from puppy!

    wish I could offer you advice, but all I can think of is looking online for hypnosis or relaxation stuff, it helped daughter in the early days. Xx

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    • Posted

      hello, yes I got to the shore and walked for hours, my wee legs are 2 inches shorter than when I left! chucked a few stones in the sea, was "followed" by two curious seals watching me from the surf, twas quite funny smile a really good day thankfully was had, sunshine mostly with a bitter wind of the sea, but twas dry which helped. I've tried some of the relaxation stuff but having the attention span of a demented goldfish does'nt help. I'll get by, usually do, just these dark days frighten me sad
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    • Posted

      goodness, i hope you had a chat to the seals! i would have done,

      she used to listen to them or calming music when she got agitated, and anxious, and concentrate on her breathing at the same time, it was hard at first to try and focus her mind, but it did help.

      can you be prepared for a dark day? have some films ready to watch, make a time table for dark days, shower 9am, breakfast 10 am, walk 12 noon, and so on? and force yourself to do it? or accept it, and just hide for a little while, stay strong. xx

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  • Posted

    Hi david

    What a struggle! Glad you had better day yesterday though. It could be all this medical stuff weighing you down, I know mine did more than I realised. I think the only thing to do is keep busy as much as possible to distract yourself but I guess thats no so easy being so isolated :-(

    Hope today is a better one too. Be thinking of ya!

    Take care

    Vix

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  • Posted

    Hi, David!

    I'm sorry for that. Depression is a horrible condition to live with.

    I'm doing really well. No signs of depression. I enjoy the tasks I do, both at work and at home and during the weekends. I can go out again, meet new people.

    Reading the above paragraph looks like my life is perfect hehe But of course I get frustrated, I get sad if someone hurts me, etc.. What does not happen anymore is: sadness for no reason, tiredness all day, poor concentration, fear of people (I'm still a shy kind of guy, but I was like that my entire life... so this is a trait not a problem =)).

    It is hard to imagine how I was feeling 3 months ago. My mind was in a complete different state. My mood was so dark that I couldn't enjoy anything in life. I was crying everyday, thinking in suicide, etc. etc. All the common symptons of depression.

    As I said in another post, I promised myself that I wouldn't take half measures. My current treatment continue the same as one month ago:

    60 mg of fluoxetine + 300 mg of bupropion

    The bupropion was necessary because I was sleepy and tired all day when only on fluoxetine. This has changed and I stay motivated during the day, no sleepiness anymore.

    Let me know if you need some other kind of advice. You deserve a better life, and the right treatment is out there.

    Danilo

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