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Getting back on the wagon

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emma84640
emma84640

I managed 8 months of sobriety a year ago and was in the right frame of mind for it and making changes and commitment. The last five months every attempt at getting sober again has failed. I know I need sobriety and there is no other option, it’s just getting my head in right frame of mind again. Do you have any tips what helped you start and stick to your new sober life? X

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  • pistal666
    pistal666 emma84640

    Posted

    I would suggest setting yourself little achievable goals so that you have something to look at physically, to show yourself your progress, there is no reason you can't be the person you want to be, do you know what you want to do?

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    • emma84640
      emma84640 pistal666

      Posted

      I want and need to abstain from alcohol completely and lose weight and start living life more, not struggling to get through day by day. I hate my office job but no idea what I could do instead or what I’m interested in. I think all the booze over the years has meant I’m no longer overly sure as to what I enjoy. I need to find myself again 
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    • pistal666
      pistal666 emma84640

      Posted

      A perfect reply cheesygrin So the first thing you need to do is keep an honest record of what you are Drinking so you can start to look at a reduction, the weight loss will follow. It is not a nice feeling when you feel trapped in a job but the good thing is that it's a lot easier to find employment when your employed (ironically), dig out that old CV and give it a polish up. When you feel like it, go online and do an aptitude test, they are quite fun and it will give you a few ideas of what vocations you would perhaps enjoy (I have a link for you if you can't find one you like). Do one of these things and Tomorrow will be better than Today. x Rip it up and start again wink

       

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    • emma84640
      emma84640 pistal666

      Posted

      Defo need a plan. Even if I keep a drink diary the intake creeps up more and more. Two to three bottles wine a night. Or a couple glasses even before I get home. Making work very difficult on top of not wanting to be there in first place. I changed career three yr ago into accounts and I hate it. First job no training, they sacked me as wasn’t progressing. Second place good training but very stressful and they bullied another girl who I defended, politely mind. We both got the sack. Third job there was too much work to physically get done but they pinned the blame on you. My current place it’s like oh we need to make you more efficient but then firget you even exist. All the can think of is profit profit. Staff development what’s that?!?! I just want a job I get paid a half decent wage. I’m struggling on the pittance I’m on now. A job where I’m valued and I value what I’m doing. As to what I’m clueless. Yes that would be awesome if you could send me the link? I went to gym with friend tonight and alcohol free. So a good first day ☺️ Xx
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  • sadie_dee70150
    sadie_dee70150 emma84640

    Posted

    Hi Emma,

    I am 5 days in at attempting again to kick my secret drinking. I would binge at the weekend & sometimes 2 or 3 other nights a week . I tried to go cold turkey 9 months ago & eventually went back to the way I was. Since Friday just gone I made the decision to no longer secret drink or drink at home but I can drink in social situations so it means I am not just drinking at home with the purpose to zone out. This seems to have made it more achievable for me. I have a goal to not drink at home & get used to that to kill that habit - that is just my goal at the moment so it's not overwhelming me. Maybe try setting yourself a goal that you think you could achieve to begin with - then when yo achieve you can look at another step .

    Best of luck 

    Sadie Dee x

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    • emma84640
      emma84640 sadie_dee70150

      Posted

      My worry is if I drank out my levels would sneak up again. I guess I’m a lone drinker myself. I live alone so it is way too easy 😔 work is the only thing to struggle to get through and take care if my dogs but I need to make more of the life I’ve got, not drown it out x

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  • david02578
    david02578 emma84640

    Posted

    Hi. For me it was my young son. I lost him and my marriage when I was drinking and since sober I have got him back in my life and have him every other weekend. I needed to do it for me obviously but he was also my joint inspiration. Just focus and believe and think of what you gained when last sober. Take care .
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    • Robin2015
      Robin2015 david02578

      Posted

      Great reply David. We all need goals to help us stopping. I could have lost my family but managed to stop. Postal gave a great reply, ref CV and start afresh! You can do it Emma! Robin
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    • emma84640
      emma84640 david02578

      Posted

      I have three little dogs and they mean the world to me but then the guilt of not caring for them and being there for them as they deserve makes the guilt so bad I drink to not feel so bad. Obviously a bad cycle. But I need to sort big time. I bet you are so relieved to be able to be part of yours sons life again. I do find with drink the overwhelming need to neck it makes me so so selfish. I love my dogs more than anything but the urge to get wasted takes over me x
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    • emma84640
      emma84640 Robin2015

      Posted

      I think after my 3 bad experiences working in accounts practices I’m frightened to try anywhere else finance based as it seems like you can be sacked any second and the better the devil you know so to speak. Hard to know what to do. I’d love to work at an animal shelter or dogs home but salary is £14k, I’d never cover my bills. It feels like I’m stuck x

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    • Robin2015
      Robin2015 emma84640

      Posted

      Stick to your Job. 14k is too low. I am on 25k and OK but used to be on much higher before recession and redundancy. Keep trying to stop...think of your dogs when you are tempted!robin
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    • emma84640
      emma84640 Robin2015

      Posted

      I’m on 21k which would be fine if I didn’t have 5k on credit cards a mortgage am the only bill payer and trying to pay for counselling on top etc. But yes the drink ate into the money worse. My dogs are my most important part of my life they deserve a happy life x
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  • BTGB01222017
    BTGB01222017 emma84640

    Posted

    I'm new again too.  I am relying on my spiritual life for help.  I also make lists of 100 things...   Like I wrote a list of 100 things that suck about drinking and the other day on day 6, I wrote a list of 100 things I am looking forward to as I stay quit...i.e., losing weight, more energy, less angry, less depressed, less shame, no more stinky bottles to recycle, FREEDOM!

    I can play all kinds of games in my head, like I will just try again later but the later keeps getting put off so I keeping my attention focused on reality...I can not control my drinking...I just want more and more.  

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