Girlfriend with anxiety, how to help
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I've been dating a girl for a little over a year and within the last few months she has developed some anxiety problems. She says she has a hard time staying at places besides her apartment, which is beginning to be a problem since we live seperately and I am always going over there. This morning we were talking about it and she said that she needs her stuff, i.e. "what if i get cold and i need my blanket?". After she said that I laughed, I didn't mean to and I know it was the wrong thing to do but it's not like I don't have blankets at my place. She says she is stressed but we're both college students and her parents pay her rent and car payments and right now since it's summer she is only working at restaurant. I don't really know what she has to be stressed about.
Also she says she gets anxiety when she is hanging out with friends and stuff, but she does that multiple times a week, so I can't really tell if that's true. Part of me thinks she just doesn't want to come over to my place.
The reason I'm having a hard time understanding is I am currently paying two rents, working an unpaid internship and working a job at night with no support from my parents. Also I am a combat veteran who was diagnosed with PTSD when I got back from Afghanistan in 2011. I had a lot of problems coming home (couldn't drive, go to college classes, check out a grocery stores), but I overcame those problems and my stressors were more significant than hers by a long shot.
I know that every person is different and that her stress and anxiety affect her in the same way that my PTSD affected me, but it is hard to not tivialize her problems.
Can someone help me understand and offer any advice on how to help her?
0 likes, 7 replies
kayla1865 Doug1256
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kayla1865 Doug1256
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anxietysite123 Doug1256
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Mynameisalyss Doug1256
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I'm back on now for a month now. And today was the first day I had panic since being back on. So my doctor has suggested I up my dose.
Anxiety comes in waves. She may have panic disorder like me. Where she panics literally about everything with no reasoning it all.
My boyfriend doesn't understand my anxiety at all and I can tell he gets very frustrated about it. I like to give him articles to read to better understand the situations. He tries his best to understand. And that's more than I need from him. It means a lot. And I'm sure if your gf new you were asking for help here she would appreciate it too.
lynne82155 Doug1256
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allison30388 Doug1256
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I'm sort of experiencing the same thing, my partner has PTSD from deployment and I have anxiety (not enough to be considered PTSD) issues from childhood that makes it a little hard to get emotionally close to someone. I think for us, just understanding where the person is coming from helps, frustration is normal but try not to take it out on her because it might come off the wrong way. You can also just ask discuss your concerns with her instead of guessing and jumping to conclusions without knowing all the facts.
lisalisa67 Doug1256
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