Going backwards

Sorry for the long essay but I would really appreciate some advice.

So I'm 28, had a long traumatic birth with my 4 year old which I also had an episiotomy.

Only last summer after having a dreadful cough I felt pressure down below which was also brought on by intense exercise on a trampoline.

So I went to the gp to be examined and was basically told i had a 'prolaspe'. No further info was given and at the time I didn't know what to even ask! She didn't bat an eyelid and sent me off feeling like it was really no 'biggie'. She told Mrs he would 'refer' be but for what I had no idea.

Soon enough I had a letter come in the post for an appointment at a 'bladder and bowel' clinic.

Whilst I was waiting I found the 'Hab it' programme/DVD that definitely helped.

Appointment day came and I went, I couldn't be examined due to time of the month but spoke to a lovely nurse, but unfortunately she only told me what I already knew and to keep up with my kegals with my 'squeezy' app. So I did! But also continued my DVD.

So I had a big 3wk holiday coming up to Florida with all my family! This caused major panic for me as I knew all the walking that would be involved in and around the theme parks! It was my daughters first time and I didn't want to hold ppl back.

So I paid privately to see a urogyne dr, she was lovely and told me I had a mild cystocele and mild upper enterocele. Also that the uterus descended a little when bearing down. She fitted me with a ring pessary which was great until it felt sore a wk later, so she changed it for a soft folding one which worked a treat! This was fitted just 3 days before

My holiday so I was anxious to see how it would be but I was amazing and I managed to enjoy my holiday to the fullest. The dr get confident I wouldn't require the pessary when I got home as she said she only fitted it for the holiday and that physio would help me alot l.

I came home but ended up getting ill and had a bad cough! I left in the pessary thinking it might give extra support with the coughing. I took it out and was relieved not to feel anything 'too bad' and my physio was pleased when she saw me! I continued to do my DVD and was making amazing progress! I was symptom free apart from my time of the month! But then I was noticing I was getting sore after each period and every month it would feel worse. I treated it as thrush first couple of times but the 3rd time it was really painful and went to the gp who said I had sores on my cervix and I'm currently awaiting the results even though they have gone now, I would

Still like to know what could be causing it.

So whilst I have these sores, I feel such fullness so the only pelvic exercises I done was some kegals.

Now the soreness has gone but the fullness is there! I feel worse than I did originally if I remember rightly. I'm constantly lifting one leg to separate the 'stuck together feeling' I have!

I can't understand why I went from being symptom free 2 wks ago to this! I don't understand if or how things have gotten worse as I'm so cautions with everything now etc my posture, lifting and exercise!

My hope was that this was something I could maintain but I just feel like everything is getting worse and I'm struggling to cope. This has caused me extreme anxiety and knowing this could only get worse is making me wonder how long I can go on physically feeling like this. I've already accepted I won't be having another child which was awful. Does anyone have any advice for me? As you can tell I'm in a bad place / panic mode.

Also, I used my pessary yesterday but it didn't completely remove my symptoms like it did back in November for my holiday which now leads me to believe it's gotten worse or that I might have a rectocele as I've heard pessaries don't really help that.

For anyone who read this whole thread, thank you! I know it's super long

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