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Got an ESA Medical coming up

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tracie08582
tracie08582

I have suffered years with depression and anxiety as had abuse at a young age, and then was sexually assaulted in the work place which brought things up.  i have been severely alcohol dependant in the past and my then support worker wanted to place me into a recovery centre. however i briefly found the strength to get better and return to work..got myself a new job... but was not to last ..infact i leasted a month.. i guess i was just trying to be normal and i wanted people to be proud of me but its made me worse and ive gone back over, and my anxiety is worse and im back drinking although not as bad as before. I also suffer with agrophobia..i dont go out unless someone is with me. I stay in and wont answer the door to anyone i keep my blinds closed as i dont want anyone knowing im in i freak if someone knocks on the door literally get so paranoid and anxious. Anyway i have an esa medical coming up and im asking my gp to request a home visit which i used to get before but im scared they will refuse or even say im fit for work just cos i went back to work just recently.. but im not ready for work. Its proves im not.. i tried.. and i failed sad. Its made me feel even more down and more of a failure cos i cant do it sad I just dont trust people...all i want to do is be at home in my safe place away from people. I have my son and my dogs i dont want to be around strangers.. my anxiety is to much . Has anyone any advice for this medical as its freaking me out sad Many thanks for reading this waffle of mine..my brains just going 100 zillion times so apologies if this post is a little jumbled. xxx

1 like, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • linda55352
    linda55352 tracie08582

    Posted

    I don't really know much about the esa but just tell them what u have written here and they should understand. What u are going through is an illness and the esa should know that good luck to you hope u get on alright
    • tracie08582
      tracie08582 linda55352

      Posted

      Thank you so much for your reply . Hopefully they will see how I struggle and understand I hope so anyway as its a daily battle for me. For anyone that has to go through mental health problems I feel for them it's something that a lot of people struggle with I guess. Just because it can't be seen dosnt mean it's not real etc. Hope your well Hun and Thankyou for replying bless you xx
    • linda55352
      linda55352 tracie08582

      Posted

      Hi I was a very healthy person up until my son passed away very sudden, and since then I have not been able to work and I suffer severe depression and anxiety , also been diagnosed with an underactive thyroid and fybromyalgia. So I do understand how you feel on a day to day basis and as you say you might look alright but deep inside you are all over the place.I hope you get on alright all these people that sit and assess you do not have a clue , they should take the doctors word instead of making people that are sick go through more than they are going through take care of yourself I have a saying until you have walked in my shoe's don't knock me or judge me cause the shoes I wear are sore and you wouldn't like them God Bless
    • tracie08582
      tracie08582 linda55352

      Posted

      Aww I'm so sorry to hear about your son that's so awfully sad , I can't even begin to imagine your pain Hun. I worry constantly about my kids and to have anything happen God id be a wreck. (((Hugs))) . I'm at my docs tomorrow and I'm wondering about fibromyalgia as lately I've been in excruciating pain. My joints are so bad and my knees keep locking up in bed and my back is so bad. In fact I have pain from my fingers to my toes and sometimes just something brushing against my skin hurts me, and I'm so weary. I'm going to get my bloods done as been run down since Christmas to be honest . Feel like I'm 110 not bloody 45 lol. Hugs to you again Hun . Xxx
    • linda55352
      linda55352 tracie08582

      Posted

      Hi Tracie I had all the symptoms you have and my blood tests came back that I had an underactive thyroid and that can make u feel so low take care u can let me know how u ger on
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