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health anxiety does'nt seem to go away😣

Posted , 8 users are following.

nicola_01942
nicola_01942

Hi i have'nt been on here in a while, but after reading some people's posts i can totally relate!! Ive had HA for 18months now and its awful, any ache or pain or rash or anything i would think the dreaded C word straight away. I would cry for hours and constantly book appointments with my gp, at the min im convinced ive got skin cancer as ive seen a mole type thingy near my ear on side of face that ive never noticed before😢 Im in the doctors today to get it looked at but im totally convinced its SC. I cried so much last night and my partner try's to reassure me, i feel guilty on him for having to put up with me and feel awful on my two children as im not the happy go lucky mum i was before. Its so awful and i can relate to a lot of u out there that are going through this horrible anxiety disorder x

2 likes, 15 replies

15 Replies

  • helen82200
    helen82200 nicola_01942

    Posted

    Hi Nicola. How did you get on at the doctors today? I just wanted to say I know exactly how you feel, I could have written a lot of your post myself. Not much advice I'm afraid, other than you can and will beat this awful anxiety. Xx
    • nicola_01942
      nicola_01942 helen82200

      Posted

      Sorry helen ive only just seen this post... i didnt get any notification through, i know it was a while ago but didnt want to ignore u. It truely is awful... im in a sh*t place again at the mo after an internal, my doctor told me i had an ectropion on my cervix. She said it was nothing to worry about but my health anxiety has spiralled BIG TIME 😢. Hope your ok x

  • sweethheart5703
    sweethheart5703 nicola_01942

    Posted

    I have health anxiety too over stds. I made an appointment to see a psychologist tomorrow. I'm going crazy. I had all these symptoms of bacterial and yeast and I was correct that I had that which isn't that big of a deal but then the medication they put me on only brought out more symptoms instead of healing me and so I did some reading and came across herpes since all my symptoms started a week after last sex. Doctor said if he thought I had herpes he would have treated me for that. (He has 30 years experience) But then after I made him check for that I got a call 30 min after I left that I might have it. He never sent that culture to the lab. Then I did acute herpes testing and it came out negative but that test isn't the most reliable. However it's come out negative earlier in the year when I tested and so did the IGG but it's only been a month and I'm scared the antibodies just aren't showing up. I see minor symptoms on me one day the next day I'm fine. I literally feel like I'm going crazy. This last bacterial medication actually see to be working though so maybe they just put me on the wrong meds. Idk. I'm going to retest ASAP. Trying to give it more time so the tests are accurate. It's frustrating.
  • joana22230
    joana22230 nicola_01942

    Posted

    As long as you are still not so deeply involved in the whole process, please consulting a doctor or something don't let this sickness to destroy your life and family as i did with mine. 
  • annie1963
    annie1963 nicola_01942

    Posted

    I too have horrible HA after having multiple health issues.  I take a lot of meds for it and it seems that when I am not too stressed out I have less anxiety.  I was off work for a month due to abdominal surgery and hardly took any of my anxiety meds.  Now that I am back at work I am taking it again more often, although not to the point I was before the surgery..  I have talked to friends and family and with all the extra 'support' I have found that talking about it helps and a therapist told me to preface my 'talks' with the fact that I don't want advice, just a listening ear.  Because when you get it out of your head, it helps.  But if you talk to someone that just wants to pile on advice, it sometimes makes the anxiety worse.  I have a stressful job and have had many injuries and stress related health issues.  Coworkers and clients that amplify it.  So I take my weekends and talk to a select few people and try to do things that distract me from those things.  It's certainly not a cure all, but it has helped me.  I am now looking into changing my lifestyle so that I can work less.  After having a month off, I realized more than ever that the job was the absolute biggest trigger for me.  I dream about it, I wake up thinking about it, and all day long I cannot escape it.  I have went to my bosses and told them that some of the 'jobs' that I had taken responsibility for was actually theirs and I was giving it back to them, as I am not paid to worry about managements problems.  It is a daily struggle as I like to control things and make sure everything is done to perfection, but I am working on it and my anxiety has lessened.  My next project is to complete remodeling a small home on property that I own so that I can sell my house and get rid of the overwhelming mortgage that causes more anxiety.  Most of it is probably illogical, but it is what it is, and I have to actively work every day to minimize it.  
  • lisalisa67
    lisalisa67 nicola_01942

    Posted

    Its is how your anxiety is manifesting. Your nervous system is frazzled in over drive. As a response it thinks it is in danger, it isnt so it will look for something wring a warped version of self preservation. So you keeo searching for an illness. You cant google in that mindset yiu will only and sololy see terminally ill ailments because your mindset is in over drive survival mode.

    idk about completely stopping it but real good idea to learn a lot about it. Tons of books and apps and workbook to help you online. The more you know the less you will fear. And oh biy fear is the driving force of it so it takes it doen a few a few notches that and therapy. Dbt or cbt. If yiu have had any trauma in your life go for the dbt.will work better.

    • nicola_01942
      nicola_01942 lisalisa67

      Posted

      What u say makes sense lisa. Im in such a mess at the mo as after an internal my doctor said i have an ectropion on my cervix... she said its nothing serious but to cut a long story short i ended up bk in her office this morning in tears and asked her to refer me to gyne😢. Im convinced its going to be cervical cancer or some other cancer down there. I feel so strange down below too... the only way i can explain it is it feels like ive got a water infection when i havent... discomfort. Dont know if thats coz im thinking about down there or if its coz there is something bad going on. HEALTH ANXIETY SUCKS !! Xx

    • lisalisa67
      lisalisa67 nicola_01942

      Posted

      Not linked to cancer so dont worry about that. Usually linked to hormonal changes or the pill. Or in people with chronic infections (that you would  have already known) your gyn will take of you and explain it. You should be happy again. Your young and have a whole lot of life to go.

       

    • nicola_01942
      nicola_01942 lisalisa67

      Posted

      Are you sure its not linked lisa???? Im so scared i have read so much online and its scared me. I feel strange down below like ive got a water infection but ive not got one... do you think thats because im worried about down there thats why ive got an uncomfortable feeling? Sorry to rant on im just so scared 😭 xx

  • Sillymop
    Sillymop nicola_01942

    Posted

    Hi Nicola smile sounds like a very tough and trying time for you. You stated that you have a lot of stresses around you... Anxiety and stress doesn't leave our immune systems at its best. Nor does depression. In fact, I think when we are emotionally low we are more likely to catch things.

    You had a nasty virus which made you feel ill and its lingering. Anxiety and stress can hinder our recovery. I have been very stressed at points in my life and ended up getting infections after bugs - my GP felt my emotional state probably didn't aid in my recovery.

    You will be okay smile you are not ill without reason, you have a cause and now you need to let yourself heal. Sometimes viruses can make us feel ill for days, weeks or even months after.

    I think talking therapy may help you greatly in dealing with some of your current stresses smile

    • nicola_01942
      nicola_01942 Sillymop

      Posted

      Hi thankyou for your reply... i dont have a virus though haha. Im currently worried sick about an ectropion on my cervix... gp saw it when she did an internal, ever since i have not felt right down below... bit uncomfortable like a water infection (but i dont have a water infection) petrified its some sort of cancer going on down there... like cervical cancer. 😢 i have serious health anxiety and have done for 2 1/2 years xx

    • Sillymop
      Sillymop nicola_01942

      Posted

      Nicola, I am so sorry my response was for a different post! I wrote it on my smart phone - which doesn't seem to like this website currently and is jumping between posts I have read/deleating my comments! I think I briefly checked your name before posting but did not check the post itself to check it had no skipped again. I do apologise and I will read YOUR post now xxx

    • Sillymop
      Sillymop nicola_01942

      Posted

      I read your post. I feel even worse for my mistake now and I do apologise!!!

      I think you need to seek out counselling with someone who can talk through all your fears, through your anxiety and health anxiety and see if you can find what has triggered this in you...i wondered if perhaps the enormity of having children makes you fear not being there with them?

      I know what you mean when you say you cry to your partner and then feel guilty. I feel like I have near enough ruined our entire year with health anxiety...it's a heavy feeling and the guilt only makes us worse.

      I really hope you can find someone to talk to and plan a route out of this for yourself, you seem like a nice person and I am sure your children are lucky to have you. You don't have to have it together all the time to be a good mum. No one is perfect we all have things that bring us to our knees. Good luck to you and don't forget that you can come here any time. I know It's been my saving grave so hopefully it can be yours too smile

    • nicola_01942
      nicola_01942 Sillymop

      Posted

      Hahahaha no worries😂. Ive had health anxiety for 2 and a half years now, it seemed to start about 12months after the birth of my second child, then completely spiralled out of control after a funeral me and my partner went to back in september 2014. Ive tried CBT twice and has done nothing. I went bk to docs today in tears and i think she is going to refer me to gyne... even though she doesnt think i need too😕. Ive never been told ive got an ectropion before and after LOTS of googling i keep thinking what if its cervical cancer, my smears have always been ok upto now and im not due another till Oct 2017. She did say she wanted me to try meds so i agreed after putting it off for 2years. Yes your right i worry soooo much about my children that something awful is going to happen to me and i wont be here... its such an awful feeling. Im only 29 and just want to be happy again, i used to be so happy, loud and outgoing and now its all gone xx

  • Sillymop
    Sillymop nicola_01942

    Posted

    Nicola,

    We are made by a complex variety of emotions. Happiness and feeling calm or content and only three of these. In the scheme of things and when you think of the other hundred things we are prone to feel, three is a tiny number. Oddly, these three small emotions are given the most emphasis and are held high above all else. The other emotions are disregarded because they do not make us feel how we "believe we should feel" - and yet, without the ignored emotions we would not know what happiness, serenity and calm were.

    You feel bad, but the feelings you have are not wrong. I think you sound as though you have convinced yourself that to feel anything less than perfect is wrong.

    It is impossible to feel 100% all of the time. Not a single person on this planet does, despite the images the project on Facebook.

    You are dealing with anxiety and fear and acknowledging your immortality. You have children who are utterly dependant on you - of course you will feel frightened/scared/anxious. You name it...you are Ok to feel it. At the end of each of those fears is one thing - love.

    These horrid sensations are born from love. If we didn't love we wouldn't care and if we didn't care we wouldn't worry...

    Stop blaming yourself and seek out some counselling. Allow someone to help you explore your feelings, to address them openly and to stop blaming yourself.

    You will be just fine smile

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