Health anxiety? Im going CRAZY :(

Posted , 13 users are following.

Hi guys sorry this is going to be long! Health anxiety is taking over my entire and I cant cope. If I could just determine whether this is anxiety or whether I have the serious medical condition ive convinced myself ive got, I could rest a bit. It started in July 2014 I started waking with headaches and feeling lightheaded throughout the day. This was on and off for a couple of weeks then it went away. I noticed my hair shedding in February 2015 and started panicking about it, then I started waking up with headaches again and feeling dizzy and my doctor organised an MRI of my brain after I became FIXATED on having MS. This showed a benign 2mm opacity on the scan and I sunk into an absolute black hole of worry last weekend. It stated on the report that this doesn’t look like MS but I convinced myself it was and honestly felt suicidal last weekend. I saw a neurologist privately two days ago and he looked at the results, examined me and said the abnormality on my brain could have been there since birth and in his opinion has no significance at all. He said that if he scanned all my family members a few of them would probably have these little ‘wiring abnormalities’ and that my symptoms are NOT MS. I felt initial relief at this but as my lightheadedness hasn’t gone away, im now backtracking thinking what if hes got it wrong. He said that my brain cant possibly deal with this much introspection and that im picking up on every little twinge and torturing myself. He said that he sees people actually drive themselves crazy with this sort of thing. My family are at their wits end with me. I just feel weird, spaced out, lightheaded and can hear this constant sound in my head like an electricity sound if that makes sense. I have started obsessing over my movements are getting slower (still thinking about MS). I felt so bad last night, then went for a walk and felt a bit better so surely if I had some neurological disease, I would have constantly bad symptoms.

If I could believe that my symptoms are anxiety related I feel like I could rest. Ive read that lightheadedness/headaches/muscle tension can be due to anxiety and that after a period of sustained stress it can take a while for the symptoms to go away because you’re still in fight of flight mode.? I felt ok this morning but then out of nowhere I started feeling lightheaded and now I have all these horrible thoughts of MS and other diseases. I paid £245 to be told I don’t have MS and im still worrying about it.

Im going to be GP tomorrow to be started on antidepressants and am going to self-refer to counseling. Can health anxiety really cause these problems? I feel like im losing my sense of reality…I cant remember what its like to not be worried about my health which is stupid because rationally, I know that I could go and get ran over tomorrow and I will have wasted so much of my life worrying about stupid stuff. Im going on holiday in two weeks and just want to enjoy it. ive had the best news ever from a professional that I don’t have my number one feared illness but I still feel ill. Its like I cant believe medical professionals, im going loopy!

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  • Posted

    I have a lot of the symtoms you have although I have been through the fear of Ms als you name it every illness they is ! It does just sound like me I haven't had a mri like you though u have had a headache for 3 months now and even fluttering in my temple ect it could well be anxiety it causes so many symtoms I gave symtoms everyday my anxiety got ad after a heart problem scare last year and since then I can not get back to who or how I was it's exhausting isn't it hunnie my family are fed up I have lost friends too but you have all the resurramce you need from doctors xx
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    • Posted

      Sorry you are going through this as well steph. You're right its the WORST thing in the world and i literally wouldnt wish this on my worse enemy. xx
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  • Posted

    I suffered from health anxiety back in the 90's, running to dr's three times a week thinking I had cancer.  all kinds of cancer.  My psychiatrist started me on zoloft for this preoccupation and anxiety and it helped.  Health anxiety and hypochondriasis is torture as it takes over your life and your thinking and prevents you from being able to focus on anything else.  It preventsyou from enjoying any aspect of life and feeling anything but scared and anxious constantly.  You may need some sort of anti-depressant to help you with this as it becomes an obsession that's torturous.  Anti depressants can possibly help with this.  As the anxiety gets bad the purported symptoms of the feared illness become more pronounced, causing more fear and anxiety and it feeds itself..  This has to stop if you're going to tolerate your life.  Anti depressants are one way of tackling this problem.  Also, some kind of psychotherapy, be it cbt or what have youb might help..  I got over the health anxiety and stopped thinking every little symptom wass cancer and moved on.
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  • Posted

    You sound exactly the same as me!!! I'm on antidepressant and seeing a counsellor but it's not helping. I have a neurology referral in June. How old are you if you don't mind me asking?
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    • Posted

      I go through the same thing every five min i think im dying which scares me beyond belief because i have a one yr old and a husband for 2yrs. Im getting so fed up that I'm not myself i use to be the fun girl/the do it all girl and this just sucks sad sad sad sad. My husband is starting to be a little isolated from me and i do have a good support system but i think im starting to become annoying ughh!!! This sucks sad
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    • Posted

      Same here my partner can't understand how someone can have the all clear but still feel worried. I've told him I have these physical symptoms which are scaring me but he just thinks I should ignore them but I can't. I also have a toddler and it's physically and mentally draining feeling like this. I feel like I'm a bad mother I just want to be a happy normally functioning person like I used to be. It's like I've forgotten what it's like to feel normal and not worried that's the only way I can describe it. I hope you start to feel better soon. ((Hugs))
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    • Posted

      I go through exactly the same thing as well for almost 5 months now

      I had a bad nightmare and had my first panic attack.felt awful numbness and tingling feeling on my arms and hands..had shallow breathing and breathlessness and ever since then things just spiral down.i have had blood test done and everything seem fine.now i am having sensation i dont know how to describe on my left upper arm to armpit then just scares me.im constantly worry about my heart and im 23 happily married for 2 years with a 1 yr old boy.so i completely understand what youre going through..

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  • Posted

    I've suffered health anxiety for nearly 6 months now and I can honestly say that if I were to tell you that all your symptoms were down to anxiety, your brain would soon find another symptom to home in on! That's what an anxious brain does! It's determined to feel fear so once you recognise one symptom, it finds another! You're in the same mindset as me at the moment that there MUST be something wrong coz my brain is telling me so. However, your brain, just like mine, is wrong!

    Have you looked in to CBT? I've just started and it's really helping! Xxx

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    • Posted

      Hi littleannie are your symptoms the same as mine? I've just self-referred for counselling. It all started when I was pregnant and couldn't help thinking I was gonna lose my baby(after previously losing my last son). I constantly checked his heartbeat with a Doppler and had to actually have counselling to stop with this obsessional checking. They wanted me to have CBT but I never went. Hope they recommend CBT this time because it's like my panic has peaked and my brain can't copesad
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  • Posted

    Hi Jayney

    Randomly came across this and felt I had to leave you a comment as it sounds pretty much the same as what I have been through recently. I didnt go as far as getting an MRI done but every time I would google how i was feeling it was coming up with MS, Diabetes, etc. I had seen my GP several times, had blood tests etc, which gave me no answers other than 'you are physically fine, all bloods excellent etc' which left me still searching for answers for the way i was feeling, detached, foggy, like i was in a dream, and having panic attacks. I know how you're feeling, like you're losing it. For me, it was the constant introspection and worrying that was keeping me this way. That's all. 

    I stumbled across a website, and it helped a lot. It was anxiety, plain and simple. i think it helped because it gave me some answers for how i was feeling, no matter how hard it was to accept that there was nothing physically wrong causing these very real physical symptoms (the detachment, panic, etc) just stress and then fatigue.

    Instantly I felt more connected and slowly began to accept things and started to get better. I also started lookig after myself better, exercising more, eating better, and meditating. Things were going well but I was occasionally having relapses which were rather disheartening and threatened to trigger the whole cycle off again. I decided I needed extra help and have been atteneding counselling where I have learnt some CBT and additional relaxation techniques, which help if I feel like I am getting a bit anxious.

    So, hope this can help in some way. You will get there. You're not going crazy. But I think these are realisations you need to come to yourself and are not as simple as just being told. Try some relaxation techniques, like some guided meditations, it should help I think.

    Emis Moderator comment: I have removed the link as it was to a site unsuitable for inclusion in the forums. If users want this information please use the Private Message service to request the details.

    http://patient.uservoice.com/knowledgebase/articles/398331-private-messages

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    • Posted

      Thank you so much SJ . Please could you private message me the website address because the moderator removed it and if it helped you I'd love to see if it could help me too smile
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