Heartbroken

My spouse whom I've been with for 8 years coming up in November broke the news to me last night that he is done. He doesn't want to fight through it to work on us; he doesn't want a relationship and wants to be left alone. He told me to go find a man who can provide for myself and our daughter. He promised he's not seeing anyone else but also said this isn't permanent, that he will eventually come around. He told me not to contact him and that he will see me and our daughter on Halloween night. He said he needs time to himself.

This happened last month, we stayed in silent for 2 weeks, he came to see us as I managed to talk him into coming to see us and we got back on track of being together. A month later, I am going through the same thing but he has gone a little more forceful in saying he wants to break up. What caused the first time this happening, was an event came up from my past that upset and triggered him. But he came around.

I've read about PTSD, and have educated myself on a lot. I talk to his Doctor regularly and ask him all the questions on PTSD (he is the leading Dr. here, specializing in PTSD). He has given me great advice and help but his last bit of advice was "A time out for you two.... is probably best for awhile. He will see things differently as healing progresses hopefully". Only thing is, he isn't taking his medications and is not going to any therapy.

I walk on eggshells and really plan out what I say, as he will analyze every word that comes out of my mouth. However, the other night I made the mishap by saying "our daughter needs more stability from you". She's 4, constantly asks for daddy, wants to see daddy. He comes once a week to see her for a few hours (we currently live with my mom) and leaves. He is currently away in another Province, has been since the end of September and our child doesn't understand why he isn't here after seeing him on a schedule and that's where my "stability" comment came from. This triggered him and now here I sit, tears running down my face because he has ended things with us. I can understand why he is mad, but I didn't mean it in a way of "you need to be more stable". I meant it in a way that our daughter needs to see you more regularly than what is happening. But he took it the wrong way completely.

Please tell me he will come around again after giving him space. I'm patient but it's hard not to text him when it's unwanted. Should I still send him messages even though he has asked me not to? I don't want to pull away completely in fear he will never come back.

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