Hello.

Hi Fruit Loop.

Well I am still here. Still taking the tabs!

Hope all is good with you,

Lelly xx

Hey Fruit Loop,

I remember you - how have you been?

Im the same, havent posted in a very long time. Have missed the forum but new job and house hunting have taken precedence!

Things are cool my end, been from 40mgs down to 20mgs and yesterday started reducing to one every other day. Hope to be Flu-Free by November

Take care amigo, you too Lelly

HT x

Hello LellyM and Hightower,

It is nice to hear from you. It is nice to hear that everyone is ok and doing well.

I ended up having nearly 4 months off work. I had to change from Fluoxetine to Venlafaxine. I tried to join in there but is was so quiet. I was phased back to work over 3 months.

That is when it all went belly to the sky again. I got a complete ****** for a boss (Mr Sennakot for obvious reasons). His management skills were a whip. I met his target and the load increased this went on for 6 months and then Bang! I had tripped the mental fuse and back to square one again. I am off work yet again, do not know for how long this time. I just cannot shift this depressive episode. I feel still under so much pressure? I see the Dr again next week? The time off has not helped so I guess an increase in meds, yuk! I have also stalled at counselling. The dark beast of depression has sunk its fangs deep into my bum this time. I have been forced into some deep dark places. The place where you feel there is only one way out, enough said.

I am just about holding it together again. If more meds are needed then so be it. Why make life harder for myself when a tablet can help? I had come such a long way since I last posted. That is the real kick in the butt! I got there once and I guess with time I will do again. I never could see a positive side to things but now I can, sometimes takes me a while. I guess all has not been wasted.

Thank you all for looking out for me and making me feel welcome here. Also for making me feel..... normal? that is not alone or like I was mad, it was ok/natural to feel like I did. You guys are the best. I will try to drop by every so often just to keep in contact, if you do not mind?

I have waffled on enough now I think?

Take care and may things keep improving for you,

Fruit Loop X and ((hugs))

Hi ya babe its Nicki B im still here. I havnt been posting recently for no reason but i always have a daily look.

Hope your feeling better! Take care

Lots of love

Nicki

Hi Fruit Loop

Yes, i remember you.

Sorry things are not good for you at the mo but as you said you've fought your way back up once and you can do it again. It's just so frustrating.

And i know what you mean - i've just had a setback - a situation i thought i could deal with but oh no the illness has a different idea.

I am determined to beat this illness one day so i'll just put my fighting gear on again and start climbing that ladder.

Best wishes xx

Hello all,

Just me again. It all seems to be tumbling down all around me.I seem to have sunk and not able to reach the surface again, not even with the increase in meds.

My Dr has decided to do more blood tests (Thursday) to see if there is an underlying medical condition. I was also told that he feels I could be a lot better, I agree. He is going to refer me to a consultant psychiatrist. I will admit that the idea does scare me quite a bit. The biggest fear being admittied to hospital. I know that they only do it if you are a risk to others or yourself. This is the tough part. I have to be totally honest to allow them to help me. Do I tell them about my suicidal thoughts. Okay being honest here, my plan. I have a kit bag with all that I need with letters and any other details about afterwards all sorted. I will not go into details. I do not want to be admitted, I have a fear of hospitals and not being in control. I sometimes feel I am too much trouble and will never be better.

I feel such a mess at the moment.

Fruit Loop