Help Beating Hypochondria!

This is a long read. If you don't feel like reading all of it, the gist of it is, I really need help with my Health Anxiety (Hypochondria)

I have had medical issues my entire life. My Hypochondria started when I got extremely sick when I was 10. (I'm 22 now). I had some sort of stomach issue. They think it was an ulcer, but we're never able to determine the cause. I had to go on medical leave from school for 6 months. I lost so much weight, people would look at me and think I was dying. I wasn't physically, mentally, and emotionally unable to leave my mom's side. If I couldn't see her, I'd freak out. I ended up recovering, but the mental damage has stuck with me.

When I was 16, I was rushed to Children's Hospital for emergency brain surgery. I have a benign, inoperable brain tumor that was blocking a ventricle, causing my brain to swell. I had an allergic reaction to the morphine and was sick for several days. I had one of the worst panic attacks of my life my first night home from the hospital. I was terrified that something was going to happen and the doctors weren't there to help me.

I had the same surgery again when I was 18. Then, when I was 19, I had to start chemotherapy. I had 20 rounds total, 4 of the first one that didn't work, and 16 of the second one that did work.

I have had unknown stomach issues my entire life, as well. They're are going to be checking for a dysfunctional gallbladder and Colonic Inertia within the next couple weeks. Im really excited to be getting answers. (Hopefully)

My cousin, who is basically like my big sister, (she's 25), almost died aboit 2 years ago from Cardiomyopathy. She had a Left Ventricle Assist Device implanted and in December of last year, had a heart transplant.

Hypochondria has been destroying me. Obviously, I have good reason to worry about health. But right now, everything is good. My tumor is stable, we're getting answers about my stomach. But I'm still having panic attacks about it.

I bump my head and I panic for hours that I have a concussion. I get nauseous and I panic that I'm going to throw up. (I have a fear of vomit). It's a vicious cycle. I'll start to panic about being nauseous, which will give me anxiety, and make me more nauseous. So I panic even more. And my heart starts to race, and I think I'm having a heart attack or Cardiomyopathy like my cousin.

I try meditating and while meditating, I feel better. But the moment I finish, the anxiety comes back.

I have a therapist that I work with. She's incredible and has been helping a lot with other stuff. We just recently started talking about my Hypochondria and I really hope she can help.

Does anyone else have Health Anxiety? What do you do? What has helped you? How can I beat it?

I have overcome so much, health wise, and mental health wise. The me 2 years ago wouldn't even recognize the me now. People tell me all the time, especially my family and therapist, how impressed they are with my transformation. The Hypochondria is the one thing I can't seem to get a handle on.

0 likes, 3 replies