1. Community
  2. Mental health
  3. Mental Health

Help... I want to die

Posted , 3 users are following.

Cloclo32
Cloclo32

I'm 33 years old. My dad committed suicide when I was 18 months old. I've tried cbt, and also dbt. I've tried to kill myself many times the most recent setting myself on fire. The pain physically and mentally is too much. My burns hurt and are so ugly. I've been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and depression. I can barely make a cup of tea. The only time I get any relief is when I'm asleep. I've been alive for my families sake for most of my life. I just can't do this anymore and it's cruel for me to live like this. Please help

3 likes, 2 replies

2 Replies

  • Emis_Moderator
    Emis_Moderator Cloclo32

    Posted

    Hi Cloclo32,

    We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologies for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.

    If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.

    Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.

    If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.

    Kindest regards

    Patient

  • maggie19158
    maggie19158 Cloclo32

    Posted

    Hi Cloclo32, sorry to hear about what you are experiencing. Sounds like you really care about your family, I have a question. You said your father died when you were young and you feel emotionally and physically tortured by this. If you do the same then could it be possible that you may pass this torture on to someone else in your family that you care about? Which could possibly lead to them passing the hurt along to someone else.

    I have had the same thoughts but like you I keep on going for family. The thought of me passing the pain to one of them makes me feel worse than the current suffering.

    Having others to talk and share with out judgement helps a great deal, keep reaching out your story could be saving lives. I hope things get better for you soon.

Back to top

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.