Help me please! Just diagnosed don't know what to do
Posted , 3 users are following.
I need help I feel like no ones been in a situation this bad I need go hear from people who have been through this and made it. This past year I've had a lot of good, I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and got engaged to her father who I've been with exclusively for over 7 years. I already have severe anxiety and depression that I've been dealing with for years. After the baby I felt so lucky I felt that I didn't deserve to have things this good. I started feeling guilty for whatever reason about lying to my fiancé when we first met about how many people I had been with. I had had 2 one night stands I didn't tell him about before we ever met. He's always been a little jealous and for some reason I felt he needed to know this before we got married. It crushed him and we almost didn't make it through this. I know it was before we met but it really affected his ability to trust me. I just didn't want to be judged for my past mistakes. Anyways only about a week after this situation I noticed a sore on my vagina. I went to the dr and she said it looks to be genital herpes, she said one of us could have had it before we met or if either of us has had cold sores in the past it could be from that, this reassured me about infidelity, this being my first concern. I told him about the sore and everything the doctor said and he hates me for this. He claims he was tested b4 me and was fine and him and I have been having unprotected sex for about 6 years. He doesn't think he needs to get tested, what are the odds he has this to? Is there much of a chance he doesn't? I've never been unfaithful to him, but he hates me for lying and hates me for having this and most likely giving it to him. I want to make it through this with him but need some guidance from people who have been through this! I welcome any help I can get!
0 likes, 6 replies
pixie1989
Posted
Right first thing your bf could not have been tested for this properly as you need to have symptoms like blisters and ulcers so they swab straight from them otherwise theres more chance of tests coming back negitive so whos to say he didnt have it before if hes never had symptoms he would never know.
2nd please dont feel bad about your past everybody has one and he shouldnt make you feel bad about this everybody has done things that they regret and would like to forget about i bet he has too.
If he has had coldsores even as a kid he would already have antibodies againt the vius so he might never have an outbreak its not saying that he doesnt have it or that he didnt have before he met you.
My bf was like this when i told him but he came with me and they explained to him nobody will ever know who you caught it from or when. Please dont beat yourself up and dont let him make you feel worse its emotionally and physically stressful finding out you have herpes without other people putting you down aswell.
But chances are he has it whether he had it before you or he caught it off you but its not that bad its not curable but it is very managable and easily managable since i was diagnosed 2 weeks ago i have had 2 other little outbreaks i take tablets for 2 days and they are gone not halk as painful as first time and its not stressful just uncomfy.
If you want to talk more please message me i dont mind talking and helping when i cn i have done a lot of research over the past few weeks to try and keep it as dormant as possible.
Chin up hun it could be worse xx
abby10257
Posted
Point is, stop beating yourself up honey. You are a GOOD person who doesn't deserved to be looked down upon, especially by your own fiancé.
pixie1989
Posted
It does happen but its not as common as having it in the first few days to a week after being in contact with it so even if my bf had cheated on me which i believe he hasnt i hadnt been near him in months to have caught it then you could have caught it years ago so could he no one will ever know and like abby said they swab from blisters to get a clear result a blood test probs wouldnt have shown it up x
abby10257
Posted
pixie1989
Posted
jessica53114
Posted