Help me understand

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My partner has bipolar & we have been together for two years. During this time he has ended the relationship 4/5 times as he gets an idea in his head then switches of from me . I have done much research to enable me to try my best to understand his condition & cope with this relationship !

What I would like to know is even with a mental health condition are you able to love , genuinely care & have real feelings for the opposite sex ?

Can anyone tell me about their relationship s as this may help me to decide if I have any kind of future with him as sometimes I feal I'm treated unfairly!

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  • Posted

    Dear Sadha, sorry to hear your having difficulties with your romantic relationship.

    i have heard of many stories were this has happened. You must remember that this is an illness your partner doesn't do this for a laugh but because there brain chemicals become unbalanced resulting in rash decisions that would be unwise. 

    If if you want to understand first accept that you don't and can't ever fully as someone with Bipolar type 2 - even I struggle to understand others at times, empathy is great but also sometimes is not enough and caring for the person is hard. if you want to understand more then read information on the internet (with caution and a pinch of salt). 

    In answer to your direct questions (which some my find insulting). Yes people with Bipolar (or indeed any illness) can love and genuinely care and have real feelings for someone (other opposite or the same sex) just like anyone else. 

    Personally i don't think my relationship status matters nor telling you about my relationships as each in unique there's no real normal. But yes you can live well together and have a bright future. A little understanding can go a long way.

    your accepting not excusing there behaviour. Take care.

    best wishes,


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    • Posted

      Thanxs for your reply ! Sorry no offence intended!!!

      My point really is that even with an illness a person must still no right from wrong ? When my partner ignores me is it the illness takes over all feelings or does he feel it's acceptable to treat me in this manner as it's an easier option ! This is we're I'm a little confused .

      Oh & by the way we're back together again until the next episode.

      I've learnt so far how to handle this relationship but it's taken much effort , I believe he has to also try to find a way of dealing with being in a relationship ! Is that possible?

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  • Posted

    Hey sadhna15793!

    Yes, absolutely. You are able to love, genuinely care and have real feelings. I am diagnosed mixed bipolar disorder (both the depression and mania) and I was the one who left over and over and.... over. It was horrible. I loved him through it all though. I just felt like the best thing to do was to leave. It was incredible how quick my mind changed. Today after 4 years... we are stable (as he is also diagnosed bipolar) We see the same counselor and doctor and it works. We are both medicated but it took a very long time to come to terms with all of this. I had to realize I couldn't run every time no matter what my brain told me.

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    • Posted

      Thanks for your reply & sharing your own experience!

      I know my partner makes a rapid decision before thinking things through , I've learnt how to cope with this relationship but how can I encourage him to learn how to deal with being part of a couple ? Any advise ?

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