Help please - I need some reassurance

Hello everyone.

Brief history I was on Citalopram for 10 years but the dr wanted me to come off and as I felt fine and happy I did. We then learnt that my mum has bowel cancer and I spirrelled deeply in anxiety again, so have now been back on 20mg for nearly 8 weeks.

The doctors are happy with my progress, I am alot better then I was, however the intrusive thoughts are unbearable at the minute, mostly to do with my Husband - he is the most caring, kind, hard working person I know, we have been together for 25 years and have a 12 year old daughter and I do love him so much, but why am I having thoughts of 'is he right for me' 'are we compatible' yes there is parts of him like his silly humour that can sometimes annoy me and as a non drinker when he does drink he annoys me a bit. I cant bare the thought of breaking up with him and breaking up our family, its the one thing I am proud of and happy with. I must also add I never had thoughts like this before all of this - so more evidence that it is my mind. But I question why im questioning it - is it a gut feeling, it must be as it gives me the drop in my tummy, the hot feeling across my chest.

I have spoken to him about it in so much detail he is so patient and supportive and also my friends and they all said its because my mind is searching for something to be anxious about and clinging on to anything negative, I guess im just looking again for more reassurance here, im going out of my mind with it - I just want to be how I was before, happy with a clear head and care free!

I also do CBT once a week and work through the online portal daily and practice practice practice.

Also to add (sorry tmi) I am due on next week and I always suffer badly with PMT/PMS (i suspect its PMDD), last week was a good week and now I feel like this again its just added to my anxiety that im not getting better and why is my mind torturing me - thank you so much for reading and for anyone that replies I really appreciate it

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