Posted , 3 users are following.
I don't know how to even explain my question properly, so I'll start with my circumstance.
In 2014 my daughter was very ill with a bowel disorder, in hospital for weeks. Upon her return home my girlfriend of then 6 years was diagnosed with leukaemia and sepsis. I was told she was going to die, and felt like I was watching her die in ICU. She was in hospital for an initial 2 months and in and out for the following 5 months after for treatment and complications. So during these 7 months I was a lone parent, my daughter going for a major operation and me being the only person to help support both of them. This time is mostly a blank in my memory, I remember very little of it all.
However due to circumstances I had to return to work as soon as the all clear was given to my girlfriend. I didn't have time to process and pushed it all back of my mind. Since late 2014 then after effects have been in my daily life. My daughter has had her final operation and is doing very well thankfully, as is my girlfriend. However signs are still there of the after effects of both their ordeals.
In recent months my mum has also gotten alot worse, having primary progressive MS. I'm ashamed to even say it, but it's like she isn't even her anymore. Her mind is all but gone. I've watched this gradual decline now for 12 years since I was an early teen. This on top of everything has become too much. I get like flashbacks of the 7 months of hell. Of me going to see my girlfriend for the what I thought could be the final time, of my daughter's hardships and my girlfriend treatment. It's all slowly coming back to me. On top of this I work 3 night shifts a week in a nursing home with palliative care. I get stress at home, at work and I just can't seem to come to terms with anything. It has been suggested by a friend it may even be bipolar disorder as of how quick my mood can change.
I have been to the GP and all he has done is give me some antidepressant. I am due to see him again next week, but feel I can't be honest about how severe it is because I can't afford any time away from work. Is there anyone I can speak to or any service that may be of help?
2 likes, 5 replies