Help with addiction

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Hi all, I find myself sitting writing this and feeling like a fool. As I know what I am doing is wrong but it’s getting worse.

I had a severe motorbike crash in 2014, a drunk driver pulled out in front of me at 60mph and I ended up wrapped around a lamp post, it was a good 20 mins before a passer by saw me as it was early and on the way to work. I was airlifted to hospital, I had to have my spleen, gallbladder, left kidney removed, I had a collapsed lung, broken ribs, wrist leg and severe damage to my spine. I suffered 3 cracked vertebrae L4/5 s1. And had to have several cages, bolts and rods put in my spine. I managed to walk again after nearly a year in hospital. But I was left with severe blinding pain, caused by nerve damage to my legs, bladder. As a result I have to self catheterise 4/7 time a day depending on how hot it gets.

I am on strong opiate medication along with diazepam, noratryiptilin, duloxatine, mirtazipine. I have got to a stage where my body has gotten used to the drugs so the pain de just keep increasing them. I have been put on co-codomol 30/500 2 x 4 or and naproxen 500 mg 1. X 2 time a day.  But I found that I have just got addicted to these or all the drugs I am on. But cocodomol I am currently taking 20 30/500 10 am and 10 pm and 4 naproxen am and PM. I don’t feel it helps with the pain but it helps me feel drowsy, but I get less than 3 hrs sleep a night as I am up pacing the house.

I know it’s wrong to be taking this amount of meds but I can’t stop, I am craving more and more. 

I go to my GP and they never check the scripts they just sign off and I can do a months supply in a week.

I am beginning to wonder what effect this is having on my body. 

Any help or suggestions would be great.

Thanks 

Buggsy 

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Buggsy , sorry to hear bout your motorbike accident. I can relate to you in some way as i had a major motorbike accident when i was a teenager. Had severe injuries and very lucky to be alive and able to walk. I had several operations on my spine and have had along time on oral Morphine and i currently have a Intrafecal Hydromorph Pump implanted in my stomach and a Catherda Tube which delivers HydroMorphine to my Spinal Canal just a fraction from my Spinal Cord. Im under the care of a Pain Specialist and im not sure if your seeing one but if your not you can be referred by your G.P and they would im sure be able to help you out with better control of your Pain Management. By having a Hydromorph Pump implanted you are only on a fraction of the Morphine or Hydromorph that you would have to take orally to get the same effect. Just a thought . Take care mate Lloyd from Oz
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    • Posted

      Hi Lloyd, firstly thank you for your reply.  I 2 am very sorry to hear about your accident. It sounds as if we can both relate to the pain it caused. Like you said we are lucky to be here and lucky to be able to walk.

      I am under the care of the specialist pain team, and I have had tons of different spinal injections but I have not heard of the Hydromorph Pump. I am currently on the waiting list to have a spinal cord stimulator implanted, I had 1 last year at St Thomas hospital in London but they only place the leads just under the skin to try and interfere with the nerve signals, that sadly failed but Southampton University Hospital use a similar device but the leads go in to the spinal canal and directly on to the nerve, you then have a computer implanted under your skin. And it stops the brain from receiving the nerve pain messages,  so the pain is always there but I just wouldn’t feel them, or they wouldn’t be as painful as they are.

      I will get an appointment made to see the pain Dr and ask about the Hydromorph pump, I wonder if it’s something they don’t do on the NHS as sadly recently in our area all funding for spinal injections have stopped, they said this is because they simply don’t give enough releife to 80% of patients, they might last 6-10 weeks before they need more. 

      I can ask the question so thank you for the recommendation. I am very concerned about my over usage of codine / paracetamol and naproxen as it’s these I seem to have become more addicted to and constantly increase well above what I should take, I know it’s wrong but I just can’t seem to stop.

      Thanks again and best regards

      buggsy :-)

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  • Posted

    Hi Buggsy,

    Sorry to hear about your accident mate that really was terrible for you.

    The thing with opiates is the more you take them your body gets used to them so you take more & more to get the same effect from them.

    I have been off Oxycontin now 2yrs in August, I was taking enough to kill 3 elephants after 9yrs.

    The problem with the amount of co-codamol after prolonged use could effect your liver, you can ask for regular liver function tests to check it.

    My biggest issue was, because of all the opiates I was taking, the brain stops producing endorphins, the things that help with mood etc, because the opiates do it, so the brain no longer produces it.

    I suffered very bad depression & anxiety because of this.

    Though I am much better now, I'm still not 100% back to what I used to be after nearly 2yrs.

    The best way forward is to talk to your Dr about it & try to reduce very slowly over time but, you've got to want to do it.

    The problem comes where you're still in pain from the accident!!

    Maybe worth, if you haven't already, ask your Dr for an appointment at your local pain clinic.

    I'm really sorry I can't be of any help.

    Good luck

    Ritchie.

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    • Posted

      Hi Ritchie,

      Many thanks for your reply and sharing your story.

      I to have sunk in to a shell, I have been signed off long time sick as I struggle to sit / stand for more than 30/60 mins, so I had to give up working.  I’m 39 2 young kids and they get collected and dropped off for school as I can’t drive.  So I have lost contact really with the outside world other than dr and hospital appointment. Even at the weekend I find it hard to be up and doing things with my wife and children and end up in bed most of the time. 

      I just need things to change and I will take your advice and speak to my GP and arrange to see my pain Dr ASAP.

      Kind regards

      Buggsy 😊

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  • Posted

    Sorry I didn't notice Lloyds reply to you before sending mine. Sounds like you've both been to hell & are still there!!!

    I feel your pain mate, (pardon the pun)! I really do, I can't even stand at the sink & wash the dishes or hoover up now as I'm in agony after trying.

    I find the frustration almost as difficult as the constant pain.

    I'm 50yrs old now & have had this for the last 20yrs, with it being degenerative, each year the pain has got worse & the frustration grows as you can no longer do things you once took for granted!!!

    The consultans have said it's all down to 20yrs of hand stacking 3000 plus 125kg concrete slabs per day as that's what I used to do. Manual handling wasn't even invented back in early 90's & we threw those slabs around like nothing, but now paying the price

    I've asked for a second opinion as I don't believe I should be in the pain I'm in. If I walk for so long, even using a walking stick, my back cramps up & every time I bend forward slightly something clicks as is if something is loose etc, don't know how else to explain it.

    But because of the addiction I had to Oxycontin, I'm on no pain relief whatsoever now so very rarely sleep anymore than 2hrs as the pain wakes me & I'm up the rest of the night, I'm almost nocturnal now!

    I wish you well mate & if you ever need to scream at someone, I'm always here.

    Take care

    Ritchie

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    • Posted

      Sounds very similar Ritchie, pain wise. Although different reasons until you have had back issues I think people don’t realise how crippling it can be.

      I have sever nerve pain shooting down to my knees both sides, but from the knee down I can’t feel anything. I also had damage to the secrael  which controls prostate and bladder, so I have to self catheterise daily to go to the loo, but I kept getting prostititus the prostate crept swelling up but not releasing, so at 38 I had my prostate removed, luckily I had 2 kids by then. 

      That was when I slumped in to deep depression and tried taking my life 4 times. Thankfully they all failed, but I don’t feel like that now but there are still days when I just don’t want to be here. 

      Think that’s why I have joined this as there are other people in similar positions and thought hearing others talk might help.

      Regards 

      Buggsy 

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