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Herpes and relationships

Posted , 5 users are following.

TryKeepSmiling
TryKeepSmiling

Hi

I am a 40 and am a single lady, since finding out I have HPV I have put my dating on hold. I just can't see how I can date having this virus. Has anyone any advice about relationships and if I met someone how I would even begin to tell them. 

I have not even been able to tell my parents or my closest friend.. It's so hard to discuss. 

0 likes, 7 replies

7 Replies

  • itakecareofyou
    itakecareofyou TryKeepSmiling

    Posted

    Hi Ms TryKeepSmiling,

    Obviously you are upset about this infected virus. But belive me, you are not alone. There are millions of people who got this out there, and they certainly still enjoy with their partners. Therefore, dont let it stopping yours! Nothing wrong with you, it is a virus that no one wish to have it. Perhaps, may be need to say "Thank You" to the virus because it may helps you to "Filter" all those insecere guy before you got a Mr Right. (everything happend for a good reason cheesygrin^) 

    When come to face your partner, i think it is fair enough to let him know when u both really get into a very serious relationship. Well, if this relationship really that "serious" enough, i think this wise guy would understand and accept the truth.

    For your closest friend and family, personally feel there is nothing wrong if you want to discuss with them, especially your family. but it is ok if you dont mention too if you not feel confortable with. (as i said, you are just a normal person, it doenst affect your routine lifestyle - meaning you are not effecting them too. Beside, you still can enjoy hand holding, kissing, hugging and even deliver a baby!) 

    Having said that, if you really need a mentaly support from your family and hoping someone would visit a doctor with you, by all means "please go ahead"

    There are few precaution of course - dont share your personal thing whichever is blood transmitting , example like toothbrush. dont do blood donation, dont try oral / anal sex and etc. (suggest you to serach more info thru online or seek for proffesional to explain to you ) **Just try to relax yourself ya, because this is the main killer/ trigger point for this disease.

    This is my little advise, hope you dont feel im too naggy. cheesygrin

    Hey lady, REMEMBER - you are just a normal person, and you r great as you are! Life still goes on....wish you good luck. -DO KEEP SMILING- wink

    • Guest
      Guest itakecareofyou

      Posted

      I know it wasn't directed at me but I really like your upbeat approach. It helps see things in a good light smile 

       I was going to mention that it is perfectly safe to donate blood, GH isn't transmitted with blood its through open sores. I checked at the local blood bank after I got diagnosed and they said its not a problem just not during an active breakout because you have antibodies in your system. 

    • TryKeepSmiling
      TryKeepSmiling itakecareofyou

      Posted

      Thank you so very very much, that made my eyes fill up. I need to just keep positive and remember that the people who can't accept you for you aren't worth knowing anyway. I will try and keep smiling... Thank you xx
    • itakecareofyou
      itakecareofyou Guest

      Posted

      Hi Ginger25,

      Thanks for the information updates. Appreciate it very much. This one i never come to the doctor and check. It would be great if it does. Will check it out soon. smile  

    • itakecareofyou
      itakecareofyou TryKeepSmiling

      Posted

      Ya. . ...thats the words KEEP POSITIVE! thats the best way out of it! Not only for this, but for Everything ! Good luck to you razz
  • abc......
    abc...... TryKeepSmiling

    Posted

    hi dont worry you not the only one having this to think about i have the same problem to not as easy as people say to cope with it at first but after 3 months of having it it does get easier i am fro the north east you can talk to someone  in a health clinc up here or chat to someone on here i  was told not to look up things on the nett as i was doing just made me feel so bab so best not go there its not as bad as it seems once you get your head around it as to the telling a partner well if it happens will cross that at that time i have not told friends /family  x
  • carol32160
    carol32160 TryKeepSmiling

    Posted

    I know you probably feel very alone having this virus,  I did too. But after a while you start to take control of it, & it's no longer taking over your life. You learn to live, smile, laugh & love again. I am married with kids. So finding love and having a regular life is possible.  As far as telling family and friends, I haven't and I had this virus for almost over 10 yrs. Only me, my husband and my ob gyn knows. This website and my husband is my support system. If you need a support system, try just telling one person you really trust. When I was in high school, a class mate (not a friend)of mine contracted herpes, told HER friends and HER FRIENDS that she trusted told me and my friends. Then my friends told some people. I am pretty comfortable with keeping this to myself. Anyway, things will get better trust me, as you can see your not the only one on this site.
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