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Herpes doesn't follow a rule book.

Posted , 5 users are following.

speechless
speechless

It's been almost a week now since I've been diagnosed with herpes 1 and 2.....still haven't had Any symptoms yet. I guess I should be happy about that. But it still doesn't take away from the emotional pain I feel. I went back to the doctors office today for a follow up visit. It's crazy because this virus gets to sit around in my body and take over whenever it gets ready and I won't even get a warning. My doctor says it's dormant and my body has an immunity of it. ..wtf does that mean. She says I may never get a outbreak, then if that's the case, WHY CAN'T IT JUST GO AWAY COMPLETELY. I'm overwhelmed with depression. I feel so disappointed,disgusting and lonely. I still haven't told anyone yet. I just can't. I feel so dirty. I can't believe he's still in denial about it after the other girl already confirmed she has it. 3 years plus in a relationship gone down the drain. He lied to me for a whole year and now look,,,she's pregnant and all 3 of us has this bulls..t.

0 likes, 10 replies

10 Replies

  • Lafai
    Lafai speechless

    Posted

    you really need to tell someone close to you, preferably family?

    Otherwise the anxiety and guilt and shame will keep growing.

    Its there with all of us.. but with some support you will find it is much less of a burden.

    It is a horrible thing, that we all wish would just go away. 

    i hope for your sake that you do never get an outbreak! but the more you stress over this the more likely it is. (ridiculous huh?)

    This is an unfair disease that leaves us all worried and anxious, and makes us feel like our bodies are our enemies and our sex drives are no longer... but it cant be the way

    people live with it

    we just have to vent and rant and communicate and see what helps all of them.

    I hope you are okay, know you can vent here and people will reply and support you.

    • speechless
      speechless Lafai

      Posted

      Thanks Lafai,,,believe it or not, this site has been the world to me over the past few days. I'd be lost without it...honestly. I've never been good at dealing with stress. So I know that eventually I'll have to tell someone or else it'll just get worse. So thanks for your words of encouragement greatly appreciated . It means a lot.
    • Lafai
      Lafai speechless

      Posted

      It has been for me too.

      Just remember you didn't choose to have herpes, you couldn't of protected yourself even with a condom and it's not your fault. You are still the same person you were before. It's just the guilt and stigma of knowing. Just keep reading everyone's stories and seeing that we all go through this stage of despair but that for a lot of people there is light at the end of the tunnel

  • ben04881
    ben04881 speechless

    Posted

    how did you get tested if you havent had any symptoms yet?
    • speechless
      speechless ben04881

      Posted

      I got blood work done on Jan 6th....after a pregnant female that my mate had cheated with contacted me on new years eve. That following Monday Jan 5th she got her results, positive. ...I went to my doctor the very next day and got tested found out I was positive for both. After she told me she was positive, I knew for a fact I was because she's pregnant, and she had blood work done. So yeah, that's how it went.
  • princess52104
    princess52104 speechless

    Posted

    keep your head up speechlesss i cry everyday love.
    • speechless
      speechless princess52104

      Posted

      This is so scary. ..I do nothing now all because of depression. I'm thinking about telling my best friend tonight as she told me almost 2 years ago when she first had it. Her boyfriend gave it to her. He was a habitual cheater. I can remember like yesterday, we were at work and she cried never ending tears of pain. I felt bad for her. I remember how she told me her outbreak was. She felt the same way I and everyone else feels at one point. I never heard anything else of it from her, which is why I was reluctant to tell her, I don't want to bring up an old chapter in her life
    • Lafai
      Lafai speechless

      Posted

      She would probably feel comforted that someone so close to her knows what she was experiencing

      And she would be able to help you through it

      It could be emotional

      But I wish I knew someone personally that had it

    • princess52104
      princess52104 speechless

      Posted

      Youre just like me speechless when I first found out 11/11/14 i was in the same boat i couldnt sleep right i would only sleep for about 3 or 4 hours and felt like i had a good sleep it is stressfull It took me atleast 4 weeks to tell my bestfriend she supported me tho i deal with daily depression to even when i know that im looking pretty i still know that i have it and by you stressing it will make you have a outbreak I have one right now my last one was 11/11/14 they will come of stress it burns like crazy first you start itching really bad then maybe around 2 or 3 days the blisters will appear but mine doesnt look like blisters it just look like small cuts its hard to even take a bathe and do you still talk to your ex boyfriend?
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