Hey guys i am 19 years old right now and have been experiencing this horror of sleep paralysis

Hello Jane,

First I'll tell you a little bit about me. I'm a former neuro nurse and I've had sleep paralysis (SP) for 50 years. That means I know quite a lot about it from both sides.

It's not demonic. I'm sure you don't really believe that in your own heart of hearts either. Most of us don't believe in that stuff any more, though I know only too well that it can seem that way when you don't know what's going on.

You've probably done some research on the mechanism of SP but I'll go over it quickly just in case you haven't. If you have, you can just skip the next two paragraphs.

We have two kinds of sleep - dreaming and non-dreaming, and we alternate between them. The dreaming phase is usually called REM sleep, after the rapid eye movements that can be observed through someone's eyelids when they're dreaming. During REM sleep the brain secretes a chemical that paralyses our voluntary muscles, for the very good reason that it wouldn't do at all for everyone to be running round acting out their dreams all night. It's important to remember that it doesn't paralyse the muscles controlled by our autonomic nervous system - the ones that keep us breathing, swallowing, our heart beating, our digestion working etc. They all carry on as normal.

This process can get out of sync. When this happens, the brain keeps secreting the chemical for a few seconds (or occasionally even minutes) after we wake up. The other variant is for it to kick in too early, before we're asleep, but that's less common. This happens to most people a couple of times in their life, but some of us (estimated at 2-5% of the population) experience it on a regular basis.

Some people just get the paralysis, which is quite scary enough. However, about half of us get "lucky" and experience vivid, convincing hallucinations which can involve any of our senses. Mine, like yours, are always tactile - i.e. involving the sense of touch - and usually painful and unpleasant. I occasionally get auditory hallucinations at the start of an episode too. These are mainly running footsteps and doors banging, but can be whooshing sounds - usually accompanied by feeling the draught of the invisible "something" rushing past me.

There's a perfectly logical explanation for all this. SP only occurs when we're coming out of or going into REM sleep, the dreaming phase. This means that when we're in SP the unconscious is on the loose, just as it is when dreaming. Only we're wide awake while all this is going on. Because the experience of waking and finding ourselves unable to move is quite scary enough already, this triggers the unconscious mind to create all kinds of unpleasant hallucinations that feel totally real. You're only being ambushed by your own unconscious.

The fact that we hallucinate in these circumstances doesn't mean we're crazy. SP isn't a mental illness. In fact it's not any kind of illness, just a variant in brain function that quite a lot of us have. Most of us don't talk about it, except to others who have it or sometimes to researchers. That's not surprising. You can hardly introduce this kind of topic into polite conversation, can you?

It's perfectly possible to live with this condition once you understand what's going on. The main thing is to identify your own triggers, then avoid them. The one that jumped out at me is that you mentioned it often happens when you're taking an afternoon nap. Me too. I always get it when I'm sleeping over and above my real needs. It often happens when I'm having a long lie-in too. That's obviously one of your triggers, and the answer is simple: no more afternoon naps. The reason for this, btw, is that in periods when our sleep is lighter we spend far more of it in the REM phase.

Paradoxically, some people find they have more episodes if they're not sleeping enough. There can be all kinds of triggers. My No. 1 is getting too warm in the night - that'll set me off every time. Some people find eating certain foods late in the day can trigger attacks. Others are sensitive to electro- or geomagnetic influences too. This isn't all that surprising, considering that the brain works via its own electrical impulses. I was interested to see that your SP suddenly got worse again when you moved house. Mine was always much worse during visits to my parents' house. I suspect this was because there were overhead high-tension cables running only about 20 yards from the house, plus an electrical substation100 yards away. Sleeping too close to electronic devices affects some people too, as well as geomagnetic phenomena generated by things like underground water sources and certain rock formations. And of course, one of the biggest triggers is anxiety - especially the fear of having another attack.

Hard as it is, try not to struggle when you wake in this state. This can actually prolong an attack. That includes trying to scream. The reason you weren't producing any sound is because the larynx is usually paralysed too. I have been known to produce sounds, but I'm told that what I think is a scream is only a strangled squawk! Trying to concentrate on wiggling the last joints of your fingers or the tip of your tongue will often get you out of it quicker.

Many people learn to negotiate with the hallucinations too. Getting angry with "them" or "it" will usually make them worse, though some people find it helps. Simply asking (mentally of course): "What do you want?" works for others. Over the years I've discovered that the best way to keep the hallucinations bearable is to reassure "it", by saying something like it's OK, I like you, I'm not going to hurt you. This isn't as mad as it seems, since the "it" we're dealing with is in fact our own id. Which means "it" in Latin of course. The id is the whiny, immature part of us, which explains why this often works. (If you don't understand any of this, google Sigmund Freud and the id.)

I hope this helps. You can share any experiences you like with me, or ask any questions. However, if you're planning to share unpleasant experiences, please could you private message me, rather than posting them in an open forum. The reason for this is that suggestion plays a huge part in all this, and you risk "infecting" others if you post lurid descriptions of your hallucinations. But you can tell me anything - I'm immune after a lifetime of dealing with this!

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