Hi, although I have never tried cannabis and don't inten...

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Hi, although I have never tried cannabis and don't intend to, my partner of 2 years has a bit of a problem. The problem being he doesn't seem to be able to stop smoking the stuff even though I am very against drugs and have threatened to leave him. We both know the drug is not physically addictive, yet he seems to try and convince me he can't resist it. He stopped for 2 weeks but the minute he was away from me he did it again. My partner knows all the long term side effects the drug can have so I can't understand why he keeps going back to it. He also knows I plan on starting a family in 2 years and because of his addiction, it could leave him not able to have children which is another reason I can't understand why he continues. I have no problem with drug users as long as they're not a loved one or friend so i'm not making judgement on anyone else. My partner has "tried" and "promised" not to smoke it plenty of times in the past and he keeps breaking these promises. It's got to the point where I don't trust him anymore and hate him going out incase he does it again. I've threatened him too many times with me leaving if he does it again, that it goes right over his head. If anyone has any advice, any at all, it would be greatly appreciated.

Ali x

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  • Posted

    i can fully relate to what you are saying but i have no answers im afraid. i have been with my partner for 3 years now. when i met him, he told me he had the occasional joint which to be honest i dont have a problem with. this however was a lie, and it came to light that in fact he is an addict and has been since his teens - he is now 33!!!! by the time i found this out though it was too late as had fallen pregnant and now have a beautiful daughter. His addiction has caused so many issues. when he gets a bit stressed or fed up with anything he turns straight away to getting stoned every day from the minute he wakes to the minute he goes to sleep. he has lost 5 jobs since i have known him due to his unreliability which i blame on the way he is when he has smoked it. when he has been out of work he has stolen money from me to buy it, but somehow manges to sweet talk me into staying with him. i too have told him that unless he stops/seeks help to stop then it is over but i never stand by my word as for a few days/weeks he seems ok with it all. i had the same old promises a few months ago and he seemed to only be having it once a week at his friends, but yesterday i found a huge stash in his car after i noticed he was stoned yesterday. i am at my wits end. i want to help him but unless he is prepared to help himself then there isnt much i can do. he tries to twist and turn things to make it out that everything is my fault. the main thing i cant handle is the constant lies and deceit, stealing from me, and spending every spare penny on the stuff rather than spending it on doing stuff on the family. he says he wants a happy family life but cant seeem to see that whilst he is on the stuff he will never have it. i am not saying that if he gave it up everything would be a bed of roses but at least he would be in a fit state to look after his daughter and gain some respect from her

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  • Posted

    My advise is don't have kids with this man. I have done it myself,all I do now is look around me at all the lovely blokes there are that don't smoke. It IS addictive, and your bloke sounds like he is another victim! Don't you become one yourself!

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  • Posted

    I too have never tired cannabis or any other recreational drug, my partner however has been using cannabis since he was 15 (and is now 24), we've been together for 4 years and at first i wasn't even aware there was a a problem because he smoked anyway, however i soon found out that it was not only tobacco he was smoking but cannabis. It has caused non-stop problems ever since, he has promised me on numerous occaisions that he will stop, however this only lasts for a few days at the most then he's smoking it again, claiming that it helps him cope with the streses of work (being a chef) and that he's surrounded by other people that smoke it and cannot resist a smoke when he's offered one. I'm sick of the constant empty promises and lies about the full extent of his habit, i have threatened to leave him if it does not change, then all i get is him breaking down in floods of tears with him telling me i'm the only thing keeping him going. I, myself am not always that well due o suffering from chron's disease, i have been in and out of hospital and am regularly on high doses of steroid medication and pain killers, which gives him the perfect excuse to carry on smokin-to help him cope!! The stress of it all makes me constantly ill, i'm at my wits end but there seems to be little help if any for people with cannabis addictions because it is not classed as a 'hard' drug!

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  • Posted

    Sorry to hear your stories and very sorry there's a child involved. I know you posted a few years back now, but if you haven't managed to work through this problem with your partners then I hope you've found the courage to leave them. They are addicted. Addiction (no matter what the addiction is) is a liar and a cheat. I hope they've found help for themselves and the courage to quit. All the best.
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