hi am very depressed 4 weeks after tkr surgery

OMG I'm not alone.

Hello all. I believe I chose a handle rather than my name. So let me introduce my self (sort of). My name is Ray I am 45 years old and 6 weeks out from TKR. And I am struggling. Constant pain, boredom and frustration. My first 4 days after surgery where spent in the hospital. Where they never did control my pain. They were telling me because I have been on pain medication for so long that it was hard to get it under control. To which I call BS. This is a hospital and I know you have access to a whole world of pain medication. After I was sent home they set me up with in home PT (Physical Therapy). And that guy was awesome. But we didn't get much accomplished because he said we couldn't get the swelling down. Week three was outpatient PT. At this time I still could not even lift my leg. I had very little movement. But I was using the CPM while I was in the hospital. I was missing a lot of sleep from the pain. Week Four I was doing my exercises at home and all the sudden I could lift my leg. I was so excited. Then my pain level jumped back up. Not that it was great but it had gone down quite a bit. I went 3 days straight unable to sleep. My next post-op the surgeon says I am overworking the knee and needed two weeks off from PT. I still can't drive, can't live without pain meds. I can get the knee to straighten all the way if I'm laying down or have the leg laid out I front of me. But not so much standing up. I went from almost getting the knee to bend 45• to maybe 30•. Everyone I had talked to said they were driving on week three and coming off the pain meds not long after. I can drive (sort of) if I put the seat all the way back so I can barely reach the steering wheel. I can take short trips on the back roads. But I still have leg spasms. And I'm still on some powerful pain pills. So it scares me to drive. I thought by know o would be working on weening off the pain meds. And working on strengthening the leg. But no I am sitting around the house all day. Nothing to do, nothing to watch on TV. And I am a "do things" type person. I have ADD and I learn to deal with it by keeping my hands and mind occupied. Now all I do is sit and think about the pain, the bills, how I'm going to get back to work. I look at my once big muscular legs and see they are much smaller and soft. And now I have found you people who are feeling much the same way. Which makes me feel better (that's sick to take relief in other people suffering). I have to ask you to please overlook my incredibly poor grammar, punctuation and spelling.

I realize I have been doing pain management for the last 3-4 years and have built up quite the tolerance for pain meds. And I don't know if it's legal or against the rules of this site to discuss pain medication types, strength so forth and so on. But I can't help but to wonder how bad are other folks pain, how is it being handled and what y'all are taking and compare that to my own. So I won't get into that unless someone else knows and would be interested in having that talk.

I spend all day bored and thinking of little things to do. Then my wife gets home from work I try to out on a happy face even though I am very sad and depressed on the inside. And when it comes time for bed I have done nothing all day but some streching and icing the knee. That I'm not tired and let her go on to bed without me. And she acts like this is somehow offended her. But she won't say so. She has been so great. I don't know what single folks who go through this live. I can do just about anything for myself now. It just takes longer.

So I'll go in Wednesday for my third post-op appointment with the surgeon who will put me back on PT. for however many more visits the insurance will allow. Then I don't know what you do. I don't think I have but 6 more visits left. I am know where near able to bend the knee back. I can't even get it 45•. And I don't see how we are going to get there. I have tried and tried to get this knee to bend further. But I can't imagine it getting even close to acceptable in just 6 more visits. Then there is the problem of building back up all the lost muscle.

O my I have just ranted on and on. But it feels good to have gotten it off my chest. Even if know one reads any off this, let alone responds. But I hope the best for the rest of you. I was so glad to have found this forum and to have read all of your posts and responses. I still feel like I'm alone in this. But now I know I'm not the only one feeling this way.

Thank you

hello

i do hope you are feeling better. so glad i found this forum was beginning to think i was going nuts and certainly find all the comments here reassuring. thank you. i am 3 weeks 4 days post op. they got me up and walking the evening of my operation. week 1 is a blur - the exercises were excrutiatingly painful.  think i have cried more in the last few weeks than my entire lifetime.  i had no idea how difficult this would be.  i had a full anaesthetic as i was petrified to have the spinal block, i daresay the effects of the anaesthetic and the very necessary pain killers also take a toll on one's spirits.  have not had any physio, do all the exercises at home on my own. tears, pain, very cold foot, helplessness, lack of sleep and dependency - all very unpleasant. some days i feel as though i am making bounds of progress - and a day like today, i just want to curl up and cry and sleep and wish i'd never done this.

Hi Patricia, yesterday marked 4 weeks after surgery.  This was my second.  My first was May 6 of this year.  I feel like I have two bad knees now.  They both hurt and I'm still taking pain mess and feeling bum that I can't do much.   But the pain I had before surgery was horrid!  At least now I have to keep moving forward.  It's very hard and I have my moments and lots of tears.  I just have to have faith this things will keep improving.  Hang in there and know that you're not alone.  

Hi Patricia, I too am just coming up to four weeks since my op.  I was fine with the spinal but unfortunately was very sick from all the drugs the following day. I had great care but had no idea how hard it was going to be after.  I have been OK most days but have shed tears through pain and frustration. I was due to start hydrotherapy last week but the wound was still weeping. Hope to start this week and I truly hope it's going to help.  I still have little bend in the knee, sitting is very uncomfortable although I can see some improvement. Sleeping is the worst, I'm so tired but I know I will get in bed and then be awake half the night! We need to stay positive and bolster each other up.   Anyone with any positive tips please let me know. Walking is fine, it's all the other things that are difficult.

I just had bilateral knee replacement 1/23/2017. It's been brutal! Still have that stiffness like the strongest band in my knees that I wish I could just cut! PT is helping but after a session I'm totally wiped out. I've been walking on my own for 2 weeks which I should be happy about but I still feel so far from normal. I cry every day feeling as if I'll never be the same again!!??I'm not taking Percocet anymore. I asked for something not as strong because I'm so afraid I'll get addicted!! So I'm on Tramadol but wondering if I'll ever be able to get off it. I'm supposed to go back to work in 2 weeks as a front desk coordinator but I don't know how I can possibly sit in a desk chair for 6 hours or more 4 days a week. I've read other people's posts and I agree I never would have done this if I had any idea how awful it is!! I'm so grateful to have found this site so I can vent with people who have gone through this!! Thank you so much for listening. Eizie

Am also struggling with lack of bending of knee, lack of sleep and tears, and seem to take 1 step forward and 2 back. Knew this was a.major operation but it's not until you're recovering you realise how major. Positive thinking hard at times. This site has been a God send. Thanks everyone.