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hi, I only drink when we go out a large glass of wine, but when we get home I secretly drink vodka which I have put into water bottles so my husband doesn't suspect, I also at night have more wine and the odd whisky also the secret vodka. What can I do to try to stop this?

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  • Posted

    That really depends what happens when you try not to drink, Gillian. If you get physical withdrawal symptoms, it would be dangerous to stop wothout medical help and you would need an alcohol detox.
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    • Posted

      No I don't get abusive or anything like that I just get tired. I don't drink during the day as I'm the only driver, but seem to go overboard at night.thanks for replying.
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  • Posted

    Hi Gillian , you really need to stop drinking altogether or certainly cut down on your alcohol intake- drinking in secret is never a good sign-you obviously feel guilty about the amount you are drinking-only you can decide whether alcohol is a problem in your life- by posting on here and posing the question you have is a fair indication of your thinking in this regard- perhaps you should see an addiction counsellor or certainly talk to your GP if you think you can- i am a recovering alcoholic, as such i am loathe to tell people how they should treat alcohol in there lives-for me it became a real problem- i too used to hide drink and conceal how much i was actually drinking- certainly i think some professional advice willl help you greatly- if you are drinking heavely dont suddenly stop- not a good idea-actually very dangerous- talk to a health professional before making any radical change- try and address the issue in your own mind-be honest with yourself- do you want to quit? do you need to quit? can you quit on your own? how negative an effect is alcohol having on you life? if you can answer these questions honestly you should have a cleare answer to your question- how will i stop? i wish you the best of luck- keep posting and let us know how you are getting on- any support you need will be here for you-
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    • Posted

      Thanks for you reply. The thing I can't seem to understand is that I don't drink in the day only when I get home at night as I am the only driver and wouldn't know how to tell my husband that I'm a secret drinker.
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  • Posted

    Hi Gillian, it will be difficult to get help without your husband knowing, i wonder how much you are drinking and what effect it has on you, if your husband is not aware of your drinking- is there an underlying anxiety issue or some other reason that makes you feeel like drinking in the evening- it may be worth your while exploring this scenario - 
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  • Posted

    Hi Gillian. I have a lot in common with you. I only drink at night (daytime maybe if I'm not working); I can restrain myself going out but can really hit the bottle back at home. I've hidden a lot of my drinking from my husband, but he knows about it now. How do you stop? I think the key is to understand why you're doing it in the first place, which is what I'm struggling to do. I think I have a lot of anger towards my family and seem to take the self-destructive route to deal with it. Could it be anger or depression or are you seeking some kind of outlet to escape a life you're not that happy with. For the record, I have gone cold turkey in the past (my drinking can easily be one to two bottles of wine a night and sometimes spirits) and had virtually no withdrawal symptoms other than tiredness and irritability - but everyone is different I guess. I've taken up running and play sport to help me come off alcohol and calm the aggression and anger. I always feel so much better afterwards. Hope this helps.

     

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  • Posted

    Hi Gillian and PS to my last reply: I just wanted to add that you've mentioned twice about being a designated driver and the only driver in the family, which is why you only drink at night. I'm really glad you are taking a responsible attitude to driving. I'm exactly the same. I'll make sure I'm well-stocked up with alcohol and cigarettes at home so I'm not tempted to take the car out and get some more in desperation. One time my husband unexpectedly got stranded a couple of miles away late at night. I had been drinking heavily but couldn't admit it, so I took the chance in the car and ended up in an industrial estate totally hammered and confused. I promised my husband I would never risk drinking and driving again. It seems to me that if you can control your drinking in order not to drink and drive you have some level of self-control and discipline which may help you give up drinking during the night. Good luck.

     

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    • Posted

      I think your right Bromley, about self control, but if I have money left over at the end of the week I make sure I can put the rest to from the following week. Myself and my husband only have one meal a day and only snacks during the day, so if we don't go out for a drink in the week I can afford it. My husband no longer drinks due to illness so it is easy for us to stay in, so I seem to use this as more adventitious for me to be able to drink,still one of these days I will feel to ill to drink for a few days and maybe that is what I need.
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    • Posted

      Hi Gillian. Is your husband's illness affecting the amount you drink do you think? I wish you luck with cutting down or giving up. Please don't wait to be ill if you can help it. Find something that will motivate you enough to change the habit. For instance - money could be an issue. The money you spend on drink could go towards a holiday or a day out with your husband?

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    • Posted

      Hi Bromley, I was drinking a lot more before my husband became I'll, as he was in hospital for 4mothes I HAD to cut right back as I needed the car to visit every day, but would still have a drink of a night time. Now I feel that I drink  because I just think I've become addicted to night time secret drinking and find it hard to break the habit.
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    • Posted

      Hi Gillian - yes habits are so hard to break and they have a powerful hold on us. I've heard it takes 6 weeks to break a habit. I try and distract myself with other things - maybe they'll become a habit instead, but a much better one than drinking. Good luck smile
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    • Posted

      Thanks for that Bromley, will be in touch in the next few days to let you know how I'm getting on,😇😇. Hope you keep up the running and stay sober. Only had wine tonight with just the odd sip of vodka, so better than last night.
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