How can i make that i never existed
Posted , 5 users are following.
I am depressed from last 6 months. I am well to do guy i earn decent and i am in place. That's all what most of people think about me. But deepinside i am all alone rejected and dishonored. I love a girl from my whole heart I've done that much for her that i can't pull myself back. She in every small argument tell me that there is no reason to stay together. I am shaking i cant even tell anyone not even to her. I am in very dangerous location of the world dangerous in term of terrorism. What all i had was her. Now i just want to die. But i dont want anyone to suffer, not even my family. I want that somehow some terrorist shot me down. All my friends and family thinks that i am very happy i have to smile and laugh with them. But deep down i am broken dejected and hated.
0 likes, 6 replies
Emis_Moderator vijay82388
Posted
Hi vijay82388,
We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologise for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.
If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.
Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.
If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.
If you are based outside of the UK.
The Samaritans is a UK based charity, but they also have suggestions for how you can access help in other countries.
Please have a look at this page https://www.befrienders.org/directory
Patient
sam18386 vijay82388
Posted
hi Vijay, it's often the silent people who are most worrying and you haven't really hit that yet! you need to speak. to someone. anyone you decide who is who you choose. more the concern is not losing the girl but losing your life. literally keep yourself safe. you in a very scary situation. is there any way you can find somewhere safe? the girl may be devastating as a loss but there will be someone out whose heart will break if you are lost. hold on to that thought. they'll help you deal with the loss of the girl, not you on your own, that's too hard!
vijay82388 sam18386
Posted
I don't want to lose that girl. I loved her from bottom of my heart. I can't confront her. Even if i told her her anything that i am in problem she never understands instead she start making situation worse. I can't tell her. I can't talk to my family or friends bcz for them i am a happy and successful person. I just want to erase myself from my very existence. Without her i am nothing. I am nothing. I am leaving.
sam18386 vijay82388
Posted
i just don't know what else to say to convince you. i felt that about the boyfriend who raped me and look how great that turned out. it's only after ages knowing someone you find out what they're really out. she's vile to laugh at you. you should be able to talk to someone. there is someone out there who cares for you regardless, THAT'S who you need! please think about going anywhere, you will upset people, i am sure of that. i don't know how old you are but at 47 i have really learnt the really hard way...
Guest vijay82388
Posted
Keeping your emotions buried deep inside isn't healthy. Talk to your friends and family about this. If they love you, then they'll understand how you feel and will try to support you the best way they can.
joshuapryce1987 vijay82388
Posted
There is always chance of change, you do not have to accept failure. Talk to her and try and work things out with her, if you cannot then work on a good friendship with her and others. You are not hated but loved. Love manifests itself differently and different people. I believe you are loved by somebody. You need to work on your relationships and refine them, make them better.