How can I tell guys this?

Posted , 3 users are following.

Hi

I have been pushing this aside for a long time been keeping busy and getting out there meeting new friends etc. I have not told many people my two close friends and obviously my ex and male friend. So I was feeling fine then started having symptoms like everyday and going to call doctors today to make appointment today.

Anyway my brother and dad wanted to try set me up someone well they been making jokes and thought I couldn't if I wanted too. Then I do chat to guys online although told guys don't want a relationship I am scared. Can't even have a casual thing well not at the moment. This has made me scared as this male friend was only one that knew about this because we had this casual thing and even that stopped and feel only drawn to him in fearof moving on and telling a new person I got this. Now this guy want to meet I feel so shut down. I will meet him and I never go there with guys first date anyway but in a weird way may feel relieved if a guy refuses to sleep with me. I am to scared to go there my first time since finding out I realise going to be hard. I supposed to me meeting a guy saturday but think will cancel not really. I will be happy not but I do miss that feeling of being hugged and kissed by someone the next step seems so hard now. I am put of that now altogether plus in fear I might pass this on even though I may have safe sex. I rather be with someone who got this and understands or person who knows I got this. This moving forward hard even if I stay single 2 years which the type of person I am won't be because I never stay single for long. Crazy all this really.

Any advice

0 likes, 13 replies

13 Replies

  • Posted

    my only advice is to be careful! i was in a relationship for 7 yrs he new i had it... we had a child together and just recently we broke up because of other things... we have been broken up now for 4months and he tells me he has it!!!! im soo upset only because he said he thinks he had it for about 4 yrs.... i just wish he told me sooner.. maybe i wouldnt have broken up with him and that woulda brought us closer years ago :-( sad part is im in love with someone else :-(... this is a mess! period... just be cautious and try natural remedies to get rid of it.. good luck
    • Posted

      Sorry hear of your experience of this.

      That what I am scared about a long term relationship. I got too many problems anyway this just this will add to it

    • Posted

      My friends husband never told her he eventually caught it from her either and still hasn't all these yrs later said anything. She saw in his military health records that he tested positive. She said she thinks he didn't want her to feel bad probably and was why he never said anything. Maybe he's just trying to make you feel bad, you think?
    • Posted

      possibly... that has ran across my mind.. maybe he is lieing to keep me ... idk honestly... but he keeps sayin hes gonna get trsted but hasnt ...
    • Posted

      you cant stress over it... thats what causes them... im trying natural rememdies now and i will let everyone know how its going and if it worked
    • Posted

      Why don't you just ask him out right? Also offer to be support at his testing, see what he does then. I don't think people sit and wait on it if they think they have it. My friends now husband obviously still went and got tested l, although he never told her himself. Shoot.. She even forgot that he got it! I had to remind her recently!
  • Posted

    I think you need to relax, you are jumping the fun on this. Anotherwards, putting the cart before the horse.

    You may meet this guy and not like him and like wise. I did the same thing as you when I started dating again and learned after a few times I worried myself for no reason, because after a date or few, I learn they are not a good match for me. Do until I get to that point of seeing that something is leading into a more serious relationship, I don't need to worry about telling them.

    You should not be worrying about sex at this point or telling him.

    • Posted

      I think it's because it's time of the month. I know that I won't do anything until I am ready. Going out with them is fine and enjoying a evening don't mean that I will go there. I just seem to be pushing guys away.

    • Posted

      yeah i know the feeling... you just have to own it for now.. i was the same way... ive been dealing with it now for 8 yrs... i finally can talk openly about it... although only a handful of people know...
    • Posted

      Totally get it... I'm an emotional wreck at that time of the month too. I know what you mean by pushing guys away, I've been doing the sane thing. If they start professing how much they like me and saying all these nice things, I start fighting hard to not tear up, thinking I'd they only knew. So then I'll push them away by starting fights, being irrational or just straight up telling them they deserve someone better than me.

      I've been pushing this one guy away for awhile and now I sealed my fate.. He's done w me and I'm crushed. :-(

    • Posted

      I'm 32 and I got 1 child and worrying I can't have kids anyway telling guys about GH too well may aswell give up.

      I am thinking might just give myself a bit more time. Feel this too much pressure.

    • Posted

      i had a son and he dosent have it... the crazy part is that hsv is soooo common people just dont want to talk about it.. how do you know the guy you really like dosent have it? you really dont know unless you have been tested for it specifically

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