How long will it take?
Posted , 3 users are following.
I find this so tough. Rape and PTSD stink! Every session with my counsellor is crippling, but for how long? It's crushing me, I don't want to feel like this how do I switch it off, why does it hurt so much? Shouldn't it not hurt now? Just exhausted by it all. Please help. Please?
0 likes, 4 replies
lynne1953 sam18386
Posted
I wish I could answer that question Sam, you are very brave. I am not being patronising when I say that, over the years I've had in patient treatment, meds galore, CBT and probably more that I have forgotten. I got on well every time and they were all happy to discharge me. The reason I wasn't worried or anxious was because i never told the truth. I have had very complex relationships with my Mother and Brother and now two daughters for many, many years. To be honest would have probably had me put away again, they would not have taken my word over his. That's why I think you are brave. I want to tell everyone that I'm not the baddie but I want them to believe me. When I was having therapy I didn't suffer like you are doing, I wasn't lying but I never said aloud the things that haunt me.You are being honest and the memories must be so painful but by the end of it you will be so proud of yourself. Don't be hard on yourself, you can do this and you can reclaim your life xx
sam18386 lynne1953
Posted
Thanks for replying, I feel better when I speak on here as I see what state other people are in. I don't know and never have understood why it hurts so much but considering I'd never been able to say anything I think what I've said so far is OK. Trust yourself, I have huge issues with trust too, it's only through talking that my trust is slowly returning and it took me years before I'd trust enough to get married but even now I push trust to the limits where it's nearly wrecked my marriage several times and rape crisis told me I was lucky! I am going to get there but don't want much more counselling I feel torn.
lynne1953 sam18386
Posted
How were you supposed to feel when you were told you were lucky! I can't believe how insensitive they can be at times. I find that my marriage suffers because of things from the coast. I try hard not to let it but my first husband left me unable to trust and scared of emotional and physical attachments. I spent years alone at which I didn't like until I eventually remarried. We are happy and my husband understands but it has ruined all other family relationships, when my Dad died I lost the only other person who loved me and I worry constantly about being left on my own. I'm glad you can talk even a little bit helps. Xxx
sam18386 lynne1953
Posted
Do you know how similar your story is to mine? The only thing that is different is I didn't meet my husband until I was 35, as he'd been accused of rape by an ex-girlfriend so has more of an understanding than most, everything else is very similar. Do you still suffer and if not how do you cope now that's different? I have virtually no trust sound familiar? I'm sorry any body has to go through this, they need shooting people who do this! Thank you for responding so honestly. X