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Any advice will be much appreciated. I've suffered depression for 13yrs & have been on medication for most of it. I have 3 children 2 of whom live 300miles away, wen I split from the father of my older 2 my son went with him & daughter stayed with me, we left it up to them as to whom they want to live with as I just want them to b happy & all was fine until his now wife came on the scene. My daughter ended up bak with him, I kept in touch & often visited. They then for some reason would make it very difficult for me to see them or contact them. They threw my son out last yr at the age of 13 as had enuf of his bad behavior & learnt that his now wife had slapped my son around the face. I drove a 600mile round trip after work the next day to pick him up & from day 1 his dad didnot give him a chance to settle in & constantly txt him 'we need to get u bak' but wouldn't cum get him. He progressed extremely well over the months but still wanted to go bak so against my beliefs I took him bak, he only lasted 1month b4 running away to my parents where he's been ever since & is doing well. My daughter I have not much contact as they stop me seeing or speaking to her & have even called the police wen I have knocked on there door to see her. I have a fiance who I love very much but am struggling, he once sent explicit txts to my best friend while I was in work but I found out & he said it was just a joke, he has also txt another girl behind my back claiming it was all innocent, I know he never dun anything with her as she lives far away. I have become jealous & possessive, I have no confidence as I cannot loose my baby weight. He now works away & I'm not coping at all, I have times I'm ok but just normally wen I'm working, finding childcare is stressful as I havnt many people around me. He says he loves me but he doesn't show it often, I've told him a loving txt would b nice or the odd bunch of flowers but he doesn't understand y he should as he tells me often enuf. My lil boy is at the terrible 2 stage so can't take him out as he's a nightmare. I'm soo sad I don't know what to do or how to cope, I've tried to commit suicide so many times I'm scared I'll end up back there :'(
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