How to deal with what I think is anxiety

Posted , 3 users are following.

 have started year 8 and I am getting more and more stressed. I have so much homework (2 or 3 hours a night), I have a grade 2 clarinet exam when I started only a couple of months ago, also I found out that my dad is cheating on my lovely mum and I don't know whether to tell her or not. Today and the day before that I faked being sick (I know it's really bad and I haven't done it before) because I just couldn't deal with the stress, now I'm almost wishing for panic attacks so I at least have a reason for being so stressed, also sometimes I just break down and cry when I'm in bed which makes me not want to go to bed so I deprive myself of sleep. Sorry for rambling on but I need some advice in what to do. Thanks!

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  • Posted

    I'm so sorry you're going through this. Remember there are better days ahead. I would urge you to make a list of the things that stress you and if they're things you can control, then focus on those first.  If you can't control them, then pray about them. I'm a spiritual person and life isn't supposed to be hard. It's supposed to be enjoyed.   Missing school, work, exams will only complicate things. Hang in there. There's always a rainbow after the storm. Read Philippians 4:1-6. It helps me. Wishing you strength, courage, and a peaceful heart.
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  • Posted

    I'm so sorry you're going through this. Remember there are better days ahead. I would urge you to make a list of the things that stress you and if they're things you can control, then focus on those first.  If you can't control them, then pray about them. I'm a spiritual person and life isn't supposed to be hard. It's supposed to be enjoyed.   Missing school, work, exams will only complicate things. Hang in there. There's always a rainbow after the storm. Read Philippians 4:1-6. It helps me. Wishing you strength, courage, and a peaceful heart.
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  • Posted

    Oh my sweetheart, what a position you've been put in.  Firstly remember this is your dad's problem, it's his doing, there is nothing you have or haven't done that has affected this situation arising.  Secondly, you do need to tell somebody. I can understand that you're really angry at your dad at the moment. I can also understand that you may feel some pressure from keeping this secret. Are you worrying that if you say something that that may break up the family?  And therefore you will feel responsible? You're not responsible for this situation and you shouldn't feel you have to keep such a huge secret.  How close were you to your dad before this happened? Are you able to speak to him? If you write down what you want to say, then you can ask him to listen, and not to interrupt you until you've finished. You could tell him what you fear most? You could tell him how big a secret this is and how hard you are finding it keeping it to yourself? You could ask him to tell mum? If you don't feel you could talk to your dad, then how about writing him a letter?  I'm sure that thought may make you anxious, what will he say, how will he react, but try to express how anxious and worried you are that the family may break up, and try not to sound too judging.  (though that would be understandable too smile

    Also, think about talking to mum.  You should not be alone with this and she may already know.  It's strange sometimes when everyone actually knows but no one dares say anything! Your parents maybe struggling with the same dilemma as to how to tell you? Eitherway, the situation can't carry on.  Would you be happy if your dad promised to stop it and it never gets mentioned again, could you trust him to do that  or do you feel your mum really needs to know? Both of those are absolutely fine sweetheart, you are trapped and being asked to find the wisdom of Solomon to sort this out. It's an impossible problem, but it's not your problem. It's your parents. Both of them. What you must not do is keep this secret any longer. If you want more time, speak to a teacher at school or an adult you trust, maybe a friends mum? But please don't keep this to yourself xxxxxx

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  • Posted

    Sorry, I would recommend you let go of the things that are stressing you. You're health should come first. Take some time 4 yourself
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    • Posted

      Erika, this is a 12 year old. A very mature, caring 12 year old yes, but one who's under extreme stress due to her fathers infidelity.   Being advised to read the bible or 'let go of stressing things' is utterly ridiculous. Par69622, please please speak to someone about this.  A teacher, a trusted adult you truly don't need to carry this alone xxxxx
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