How to relax?

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I'm on day 7 after my HET procedure and getting my fissure. i have used the bathroom multiple times all ending in stomach sick leg shaking sobbing. i was doing ok yesterday but realozed i still had to use the bathroom so i tried and went but there was even more pain than before i fear i hurt myself again and am starting healing all over. i was doing ok the first few days eating and using the bathroom (still with pain) but as the days keep going im having a hard time eating and i keep sobbing uncontrollably and i cant seem to relax. im scared to use the bathroom. ive taken a muscle relaxer to just go to sleep but once i wake up again my head starts all over and im sick again and uncontrollably sob. does anyone have any ideas that can help me relax. i feel like my brain is going to explode. im afraid to even pass gas.

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