Hunger pain 24/7 due to unhealthy eating behavior
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For months I have had unusual or unhealthy eating . I am always in hunger pain 24/7 because everything i am given to eat, i cannot make myself eat it. It just looks and smells disgusting, and if it feels unclean or makes my hands greasy or teeth feel disgusting, could get in hair, temperature of me/not being clean, etc., I have to force it down and only get halfway before giving up. I have no desire to eat anything in my surroundings and no appetite. I am in pain all of the time, but I don't know what to do about it. I eat very little throughout each day, I was forcing food down my throat for awhile because I was afraid of losing more weight (I am currently very light) but I've lost the will to do that now. My parents do not believe that I have problems with eating/that my pain is caused by hunger, and when I was taken to the doctor my mom told the doctor there's no way I could be hungry because I shove lots of food into my mouth throughout the day. As a result, doctor prescribed 150 mg of over-the-counter acid reflux pill morning and night, and then possibly an endoscope in the future to check for an ulcer. I am underweight and to me I look too skinny and have been asked if I am anorexic, and I am hungry all day, every day--but I don't know what I should do about it., as I have no money or driving abilities to get my own food and can't cook.
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katlouise1989 v71817
Posted
Hi,
Sorry to hear about the challenges you are facing, it must be tough.
Just to start with a little pet-peeve of mine, you can't be anorexic as anorexia isn't an adjective, in the same way you can't be cancer. You can have anorexia (sorry, just drives me up the wall when people say they are anorexic).
I'm going to start with the barriers you mentioned, to accessing food. If you can't afford food, you need to speak to your doctor or the council, as they can supply food vouchers which you can use at food banks. You should be eligible for discounted/free travel on public transport if you are on benefits, but fortunately this is something I don't have personal experience about, so again you may want to check this. It's nothing to be ashamed of - the economic situation has meant that more people than ever are using food banks (even those who are earning).
If you can afford some food, but as you say can't drive, have you considered ordering home delivery from the supermarkets. Sainsburys, Tescos, Asda and so on all do home delivery. You basically order everything online, pick a delivery slot which suits you (some slots are cheaper than others as some times are 'peak' and 'off-peak' so it's better to go for these if you can.
I can't drive either, so I do this all the time - absolute life-saver. I tend to bulk buy food, and then make food in batches, for freezing. As a single person, this works out very cost effective as my food lasts a good couple of weeks.
You've mentioned that you are underweight, which isn't surprising given you can't keep much food down, as you'll have a calorie deficit which leads to weight loss. It's interesting that your doctor has prescribed acid-reflux medication and is investigating you for an ulcer, as given the symptoms you've mentioned, I'd be tempted to agree. I am surprised that they haven't referred you for blood tests, as that's a good way to rule out anything sinister.
I think if the tests come back normal, you might want to consider how you are feeling when you eat i.e. have you had a particularly bad day? Have you had any difficult experiences in the past when you've eaten i.e. something has made you throw up?
Exploring past events is a good way to find out if there was a particular trigger for how you are behaving currently.
It is worth noting that you parents' comments about you eating throughout the day doesn't mean you can't have an eating disorder! A very common myth is that people with eating disorders don't eat anything at all, and are low weight. Actually, anorexia is the least common of all eating disorders and even people with anorexia eat. Many don't admit that they binge in between restriction cycles - I had the confidence to tell my dietitian that I binged, and he was like "of course you do, that's the body's instinctive survival response". So your parents are wrong to say that you can't have an eating disorder because you eat. Binge eating disorder and bulimia are far more common than anorexia, although the media would have us believe it's the other way round.
You mentioned that you find greasy foods a problem. Remember that there are loads of foods which aren't greasy, and cooking from scratch e.g. vegetables and some type of carb like couscous, means you know what's in your food.
As mentioned, I think the actions your GP has suggested are a good starting point, but if the tests come back normal, an eating disorder doesn't leap out at me. Actually, anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder ring more bells here.
If you are worried that you might have an eating disorder, could I encourage you to visit Beat's website (Beat are the UK's eating disorder charity). They have free, confidential helplines which are open 365 days a year in the afternoons and evenings. They have some great online advice, and facilities such as 1-2-1 chat and twitter support. They also run online support groups every day of the week.
I hope this is helpful.