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Hyperawareness OCD, experiences.

Posted , 2 users are following.

al-pk9
al-pk9

Hello.

I've been on the anxiety and citalopram forums for quite some time, but I've been afflicted with this condition for several weeks now following an episode of depersonalisation and it has been previously nameless and unidentifiable to my regular GP. It doesn't help that I find it very hard to describe to people as it is also very anxiety and stress inducing, and confusing. However, I think I may have found a match.

Essentially I have become hyper aware of consciousness, thought processes and concepts of time. I believe this was due to spending a lot of time in my head during my DP episode, and I remember thinking about how if I surrendered to it, it would 'fix itself in time'. It is almost like existence itself causes me angst at the moment and there is little to no relief from this from morning to night. Every thought is under scrutiny, day dreaming has gone out of the window. For example, if I think about having a good day, my mind will latch on to 'day', thinking about all the angles and eventually getting super wierd about it.

I'm looking for similar thoughts, perspectives and experiences with this, and any methods of recovery and coping which may have helped.

Many Thanks,

Al

0 likes, 2 replies

2 Replies

  • dana01526
    dana01526 al-pk9

    Posted

    Hi Al, I have been suffering from Depersonalization and Derealization for nearly 15 years. I am diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Pure Obesessive complulsive disorder. As for methods of recovery have you tried CBT Therapy? It can really help a lot. Or have you started any medications? I saw you say something about celexa which I was prescribed for 12 years, Was a wonderful drug for my treatment but eventually stopped working.  Having episodes of depersonalization can be very scary and surreal but I assure you it’s just anxiety and it will pass. A lot of people won’t understand where you are coming from as it is hard to explain.  My personal experiences have felt like I can’t feel my hands or my body or I’m in a 3rd person view looking at myself. I have had times where I think I can’t walk or there has to be something wrong, Almost everyday of my life I go through this. I have major Health Anxiety and that does not help either. But with time and Therapy and the correct medications I have found some sort of relief. As for my best coping strategy would be to change your thought process a very common CBT technique. I wish you nothing but the best. Good luck AL - Dana
    • al-pk9
      al-pk9 dana01526

      Posted

      Hey Dana,

      Thank you. I haven't been undertaking CBT at the moment I'm awaiting a psych referral in about a week or 2. Honestly I'm apprehensive as the initial coping strategies I implemented have now seemed to cause me real problems by becoming constant 'ticks' in the brain. DP/DR I have some past experience with, but I have almost no control of my thoughts at the minute. It's been a pretty hellish 6 weeks with times I thought I'd be getting better but now the dust seems to be settling and what is there, being persistant is pretty worrying and all consuming. Thanks for the reply Dana.

      Al

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