Hysterectomy feelings

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Anyone else feeling a little strange about their hysterectomy? I know we are done having kids. I was fine with it all leading up to the op, especially having the prolapse that i would have struggled to carry a baby anyway. But now post op I'm feeling a little sad. That the chapter of having babies is officially over. That I can never do it again. We can never change our minds. Although we have 3 beautiful kids & even when deciding to go for a 3rd we knew it would be the last one and our little family would be complete. I'm/we're quite young in the grand scheme of things. I find myself getting emotional seeing newborns!! The youngest is 8 months old so you would think id be all loved up (which i totally am) and wouldnt feel this emptiness!! Please tell me this is normal & it will pass 😭

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18 Replies

  • Posted

    Totally normal!

    It’s an end of a part of your life and so of course you’ll feel a tinge of sadness, especially as it sounds as if you’re still quite young.

    I still have my womb as I had a hysterepexy where they insert a mesh underneath the womb to hold it in place and I’m 49 and in the menopause but I stil have a tinge of sadness, tho I resigned myself to no more kids a long time ago!

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    • Posted

      Im under 30 (just lol) & hubby is under mid-30s. I thought i had come to terms with no more kids (although sad I knew that was it for us) when we had our 3rd I just totally soaked up every moment (as best I could) because I knew there would be no more, most of our friends are done having kids, there still the odd straggler that will have more, but most are done & husbands have had vasectomies. They seem happy & content with their decision i wish i could be too 😭 it just feels so final & I feel like I'm not ready all of a sudden!!

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  • Posted

    Hi ta m

    I am 50 did natural early menopause at age 45. That made me feel very sad at the time but I knew I couldn't change it.

    I had my uterus removed in January with anterior repair and too be honest I am so much better than once thought. I do feel down sometimes that I can't have children anymore even if I wanted too but you know what I saw it as an empty carriage now that has served its purpose very well and have me 2 beautiful children now 20 and 22,which I'm proud off... I still have my ovaries so still feel feminine in many ways.

    Our uterus doesn't define who we are it's our unique DNA that makes us who we are.

    You are younger than me I presume but honestly think of how you will feel without the bulged . That in itself made me feel like a freak believe me.

    Honestly hun you will absolutely fine. Hugsxc

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    • Posted

      Hello Welshgirl,

      I am wondering how you are doing now after your surgery?  I too, had my uterus removed and had a rectocele repair 4 weeks ago.   I still feel like I am sitting on stitches. I’m 55 years old. 😊

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    • Posted

      Hi lovely

      I'm doing fine thanks. I do feel like I have something rubbing low in front but have been checked over and all normal.

      I was told urethra low after childbirth and surgery. I am still aware of my vagina though lol.

      All healed great otherwise. How about you hun?xx

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    • Posted

      I’m hanging in there. I feel the stitches in my vagina. Ugh! It’s so hard, laying around.  I wonder about sex etc. Were you given restrictions on what you can do for the rest of your life, like lifting, walking etc. I appreciate you talking with me. 😘

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    • Posted

      Yes this is so hard! Lying around & wondering, I'm almost 1 week post op so all is still swollen but I wonder what it's going to be like when it's fully healed lol, I feel like I've been sewn shut at the moment!! I feel a tingling in the stitches alot, my doc says this will happen all the way to about the 12 week mark when they are properly dissolved. I've been told no heavy lifting or high impact sports ever again, but he never pit a limit on it? I have a follow up tomorrow I'll find out what he considers heavy lifting! Interesting also I never heard of the urethra being low!?

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    • Posted

      Yes love I was given restrictions. Defiantly no heavy lifting,no straining to poo,no high impact exercise,no running ever.

      He was very strict in saying these repairs are not for life and can fail if we abuse the aftercare instructions.

      I am very very cautious,too much I think but I cannot go through it again anytime soon. It's mentally awful I think. I am not even lifting a kettle,too scared.xxx

      Ps I'm 13 wks today x

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    • Posted

      Apparently it is normal in ladies who have had childbirth. It's naturally higher beforehand.

      I wanted to know what the fleshy but under urethra before the vagina opening but was told its normal. My consultant is a proff so I must listen lol😁

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    • Posted

      The specialist was so happy & positive about it all at my 1 week post surgery check up today! I'm too scared to go poking around just yet though haha he said the heavy lifting for life is referring to anything that makes you strain, if you can lift it with 1 arm it's fine if you need your body to help lift or you have to hold your breath or anything you should rethink 😊 so thats good to know!

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  • Posted

    Im under 30 (just lol) & hubby is under mid-30s. I thought i had come to terms with no more kids (although sad I knew that was it for us) when we had our 3rd I just totally soaked up every moment (as best I could) because I knew there would be no more, most of our friends are done having kids, there still the odd straggler that will have more, but most are done & husbands have had vasectomies. They seem happy & content with their decision i wish i could be too 😭 it just feels so final & I feel like I'm not ready all of a sudden!!

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    • Posted

      At such a young age it’s understandable, and tho you’ve made the decision, because you are plenty young enough enough to have more, it’s totally normally to feel sad about the loss of your fertile, child bearing body.

      What you’re going thru is similar to grieving in many ways, take things day by day, and remember the reasons behind your decision. XXX

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    • Posted

      Don’t worry about it, we all have down moments, especially in the early stages of recovery, totally normal.

      I’d think your hormones are also playing havoc with mood/emotional state of mind too.xxxx

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    • Posted

      Yep we will blame the hormones!! (They left my ovaries 😉wink finally back at home with my babies & feeling a little better ? doc said all looks to be healing well, I can't help but feel positive about it when he was so positive at my check up. So fingers crossed there is a light at the end of the tunnel!! Hope your recovery is going well xx

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    • Posted

      Glad to hear you’re feeling better!

      Physically I feel okay except this overwhelming tiredness!

      I’m so tired all the time, not sleeping well at night tho, but my occasional lunchtime nap helps!!

      (First time today so can’t blame not sleeping at night on napping!)

      Back to work next Tuesday and dreading it and not sure how I’ll cope!!

      I only work Mon-Wed Term time so hopefully be fine tho!!

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    • Posted

      Yes I find I'm tired all the time too! I think it's all this sitting around and not doing anything!? I feel like I want to do more but my body (& my husband) promptly tell me that I can't!! I hope you go ok at work, I'm luckily on Maternity leave until I think Feb next year so I should be right by then. Best of luck!! That will be a new challenge, this recovery seems to bring so many

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