I am a complete mess

It's the worst thing I've ever tried to manage. 

Have your tried diazpam - i could not cope with out them it takes all the nasty thoughts away and within mins you are calm, They dont last that long but its the only thing that gets me thru the day

Have you also tried CBT ??

I was on lorazepam for a while but became chemically dependent and getting off was a nightmare. Now I am afraid if meds thus being why I tried buspar it's not dependent. I think it is making me worse though. 

Never been convinced medication is the answer to anxiety. If you learn to control yourself, you become more confident in yourself and not have to rely on other things to help you. When the medication isn't there at your fingertips, it's a faster and more efficient way of dealing with things and often I've found I don't need medication afterwards.

You must be a strong person.... I thought I was but this mess is beating me.

No it's not. You're still breathing which means you're still in control of it.

True but how is it that I keep on doing this over and over. When u say the facts it makes sense to me. Yet I find myself in the same predicament mere minutes later...

That's because on this website you're surrounded by a lot of negativity and - naturally when you feel negative you gravitate towards more negative thoughts and feelings than the positive ones. What I said above above breathing techniques and so on, it's designed to give you something else to think about, and it's a lot more positive in nature than discussing what medications to take, what other people feel and so on. Not that there's anything wrong with that but paying attention to that more than actual advice can have negative effects on you and how you feel.

It's like, there's advice that might help you think differently and change your life. Then there's another post from another person who says "know how you feel; chest pains are killing me" or something but isn't really helpful because it just backs up what you feel rather than makes you feel differently.

I posted this a bit further up on this thread, Paul but feel free to give this a go:

The best thing to do first is become aware of your physiology, or the very real physical symptoms you're experiencing. They are there. It isn't necessarily a symptom of anything else but if you fear it is, you should consult your GP. If you have physical checks and they eliminate the problem (ECG for heart, etc) then you should put it down to anxiety.

Anxiety comes because your brain is creating a 'fear' in your mind, and as with anything that creates fear, you become anxious.

The anxiety, usually, starts in your chest, so you begin to breathe faster and your chest becomes tense (as a muscle would if it is being exercised). Your lungs need more oxygen and no greater way of getting oxygen around your body is by blood. Blood gets to your lungs faster when your heart pumps it quicker, so your heart rate increases.

The lungs are working hard now. They are communicating with your brain asking for more help. Your brain helps by asking your heart for support. So the heart is working harder than it normally would to the point where it needs help from your brain again.

Your brain can't cope with both having a go at it asking for support - you get symptoms such as perspiration, pains in your chest, tingling in your arms, toes and fingers. So your brain panics and makes mistakes.

Your brain then tells you to react accordingly – panic.

The panic says, “focus on your heart; why is it faster? Why are my arms tingling? Why does my chest hurt?”. Your brain says, through duress and under pressure, “I'm having a heart attack; I'm going to die!”

You're not. Just stop and think before your lungs tell your brain that they need oxygen, fast. Focus on your breathing.

How to deal with anxiety is subjective and it depends on how disciplined you are in being able to set yourself space and time to be able to perform breathing exercises rather than rely on medication being there for you to help you. 3 things I've found are the most helpful - 1. Guided Meditation, 2. Mindfulness and Awareness, 3. The '7 to 11 Breathing Technique'

Guided meditation, first of all, is quite structured and disciplined in the sense you have somebody there guiding you through the process of meditation (obviously) and you don't want to disturb others doing it at the same time - but similarly expect others to respect you whilst you do it.

Mindful and awareness can often come hand in hand with guided meditation. Through mindfulness and awareness, you become aware of where you are and most importantly what your body is physically experiencing. In focusing on these feelings (chest pain, shortness of breath, pins and needles) by breathing them in, in a controlled manner, by breathing them out you are effectively telling your brain and body to breathe these pains out too, and they will eventually go away.

The 7 to 11 breathing technique is when you breathe into your lungs through your mouth, nose or both, until your lung capacity is completely full - it may even hurt; you may use parts of your lungs you've never used before - and hold your breath for 7 seconds. Following this, you purse your lips as though you were blowing out a candle and gradually exhale until your lungs are empty. You hold this for 11 seconds and don't take another breath.

Keep doing this for as long as you want. The longer, the better. During the exercise you might experience forms of euphoria; your fingers may tingle, your head may feel slightly dizzy - this is good; this is tension unburdening itself off you; don't worry about it. Instead, focus on it and treat it as a good feeling.

With all of this, it will not be an immediate cure. Mindfulness and awareness courses, and meditation classes take time to book and when you go to them, both take patience to master. The 7 to 11 breathing technique you can perform whenever you want.

Is it ok to use this on my facbook group that I created yesterday its ins and out of anxiety and how to cope feel free to join its called anxiety ( health anxiety)

I don't mind you using it so long as you direct people to this website and, if people find it useful, then to ask them if the'd like to send a message or two if they're interested in more tips.

Incidentally I can't find your Facebook group so if you could send me a link to it, I'd be interested in checking it out

"I am now on antidepressants but feel worse as I am waiting for reaction all the time. Go to doctors they can refer you fir cbt"

I see so many people go through this process, it's shocking.

I am going to my first therapy session today and my Gp tomorrow. It's an awful thing to deal with. Thank you for your support it helps to get encouragement from people that struggle as well.

You're welcome. I hope you found my advice helpful. Take care