i am crazy!!!

Posted , 8 users are following.

i am having an agrument yesterday and my husband had the nerve to say you are getting out of control and this needs to stop now!! he tells my kids that i am mad and get upset because of menopause and there is nothing we can do about it. does he really think i enjoy having these moods swings weight gain not being myself how dare he says that to me. he has no idea how i feel and i wish to god i could change it but at 52 i cannot change it. plus last month i had colon surgery 8 inches were taken out and reconnected so i am also dealing with that and trying to get back on my feet from that. the dr. had to cut me open and this was the first time i ever had surgery and it is not pleasant at all and i am dealing with this and menopause and right now i cant tell you how very low i feel and i am rwady jusr to give up. of course now he is sorry but the damage is done when you are yelling at me that i am out of control and this needs to stops!! you know hasnt stop my tears!!! thank you for letting me vent and i know someone out there must understand how i feel thank you!!!

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8 Replies

  • Posted

    Kathy,

    So sorry that you are going through all of this.. especially the lack of support! Do you think your husband just does not understand? I wish we were tought this stuff growing up! No one prepares us for Peri/ Meno moods etc..  Good luck! XX

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  • Posted

    I am so sorry he said that to you and expressed something negative about you to the kids. We can barely understand what we're feeling and going through, it is not expected that men would understand. When my husband is frustrated or scared he says insensitive things too so you're not alone. I believe he only said that because he did not understand and that he's afraid because he may not know how to relate/respond to you during this time. Men like to have all the answers and "fix" everything and when they can't it affects their make ego. So don't take it personally if you can help it. Remember we're here for you. Take care.

    Xx

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  • Posted

    Hi Kathy,I m sorry you re going through so much at the momment.i know it's hard but try not to take it to heart,my husband thinks you can just fix things,it must be a man thing.Maybe next time he says sorry,calmly tell him how hard it is for you coping with your op and menopause.My husband isn't really a talker,but every now and then when he's in the right mood I tell him that I going through horrible stuff,and I thank him for being patient.I know we shouldn't have to say things like that,but some respond better when you re stroking their egos,and I guess they must be just as confused about what's going on as we are.He was out of order for saying that to your children,if they of an age where they can understand maybe talk to them and tell them that you re not well at the momment.Remember we re all here if you need a rant 😊xxx
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  • Posted

    Hi Kathy, you've found the right group. We're all here to support each other and it also helps to understand what's going on with our bodies. It's good to be able to 'vent' our feelings when we're struggling with the various issues we all have to deal with.

    We're not machines, we try to cope the best we can.

    Without doubt, men haven't a clue how to cope with ' the menopause' and all the awful, weird peculiarities involved. They feel helpless and frustrated because they can't fix it and so say things that are downright insensitive to us. They may be sorry afterwards, but by then the damage is done.

    When you're menopausal you feel fragile at times and stuff bothers you where before it might not have. I'm sorry to hear you're going through an awful time just now, but as we said before, we all support each other, so you are not alone.

    I hope things improve for you, maybe at some point when you're feeling a bit better you and hubby can have a heart-to-heart and let him know how you're doing/feeling and you know he can't really do anything except be there for you, even if it's a hug, when you need it. I had the heart-to-heart with my husband and he understands just a little bit better. Love and hugs, xxxx

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  • Posted

    hun you are NOT going mad .........my husband is good and trying to understand but i think he must wake up thinking what is she going to moan about today....i feel im going mad..so lonley....you have support on here....hugs to you
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  • Posted

    Hi Kathy, do hope you're feeling ok & that you're recovering well. Welcome to the "mad" club! LoL...seriously, this whole menopause business makes us all feel crazy, scared n wondering what the hell's going to happen next....you're in good hands here, feel free to vent...we all share n care. I don't think men have a clue what we women go through with our hormones dancing all over the place! 😖 The many arguments my hubby & I have had about my moods with floods of tears, not feeling well or right & the lack of intimacy etc he says he's had enough of seeing it & hearing about it, I do understand how you feel, where I live I don't have friends or family, this forum is my support.

    Take care & be kind to yourself, keep in touch. Sending Hugs 💖

    ps, hope I didn't offend about the mad club, I have a warped sense of humour, sometimes a laugh helps to soften the edges.

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  • Posted

    Hi kathy sorry to hear that you are going through a tough time 

    you should get out and look for a support group and your husband should be more understanding but guys just don't understand what us ladies are going through with getting into our moods and not sleeping good and just not feeling good either 

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