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I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Help!

Posted , 3 users are following.

s34391
s34391

I've never had many friends and im now at a point in my life (26) where things are stagnant and i really don't see how they going to change.

I only really have 3 friends, one of whom lives in the same city as me but he has his own group of friends and is also pretty unreliable. I have lived here 2 years and havent really made any real friends. I don't really click with the young people and tbh with one exception, none of them see eachother outside work. I joined a squash league to meet people but there is no one my age. 

I feel like im missing out on my 20s and life is passing me by. I feel like a gf would give me some focus but its a catch 22 as how can I meet women when i have few social outlets.

I think i've been happy for a long time as I've never had a good social network and it has left me feeling extremely alone, however it has intensified over the last 6 months and I'm struggling to cope. I often break down in tears when im at home. I'm feeling really tired of being upset all the time. I feel like I'm waiting for something in my life to suddenly change. 

Does anyone feel the same way or have advice?

2 likes, 4 replies

4 Replies

  • john49464
    john49464 s34391

    Posted

    Hmmmmmm your life only changes if you change it I don't think for one minute life is passing you by sound like your a little shy that's all and your stressing yourself out over stuff.

    There are loads of websites now which are brilliant for dating meeting people etc I have a lot of people at work who have met people on line and are very very happy who are in the same situation as yourself makes dating a little less stressful.

    I think also you could do with seeing a doc see if they can help with advice or meds etc just to stop you feeling low for the interim

    Most important don't stress yourself out little steps is all it takes and you will find happiness

    • s34391
      s34391 john49464

      Posted

      Thanks for replying. I wouldn't say I'm that shy tbh but perhaps reserved e.g I'm not someone that likes to get up and dance. That said, I do find it hard to click with people and I suppose I am fussy but that's not something i can change; I either enjoy someone's company or I don't. I definitely not shy with women e.g. I can pick up women in bars etc but I rarely get the chance. Likewise I don't find dating stressful. I have tried on line dating and been on loads of dates but there are a lot of pitfalls with that and I've become a bit jaded from the experience. 

       

  • katylynn
    katylynn s34391

    Posted

    Hi we all have to make change happen it doesnt knock at our door, start with the easy basic things take a night school course one that attracts females as well, help at a nursing home or childrens club as they will both have staff that are your age group what we cannot do is advertise to bag a new friend as you have to click, and please look at all your good points and focus on them I dont know where you live but call into cafe bars even for a coffee at lunch time and please sometimes you need to start the conversation good luck take 1 new step a week you will soon be on a roll
    • s34391
      s34391 katylynn

      Posted

      Hi there. It's not about women as such, that was an example of a limitation of a poor social network. I really need male friends which is actually more difficult as you cant ask a guy out plus male activities dont tend to be one on one. Also other people i meet usually have their own group of friends and arent really interested in making new ones outside that circle.
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