I did it!
Posted , 7 users are following.
I told the man that I've become very fond of that I would like to see if we can have a relationship together and he said he's very interested. Then had to tell him about the herpes and I chickened out and left his house.....and then walked back and said I needed to tell him something because I want the relationship to be open and honest, no secrets and I didn't want to hurt him - I have genital herpes. He doesn't know anything about it so we spoke a bit and I told him that I don't want to infect him when we get to the stage that we want to have sex so we would have to be very careful as it is so contagious. I also told him that many people are infected but because they have no symptoms, yet, they don't know they have it and they could have an outbreak at any time in the future. I also said that if, after he learned more about it, he wanted to call it off, I would understand; he told me he didn't think that would happen.
So take courage, everyone, it can be done and it doesn't always mean instant rejection. There is hope for all of us.
3 likes, 10 replies
the56796 Talullah
Posted
scott1776 Talullah
Posted
I think that if someone really, truley cares about the other person, that HSV-2 wouldn't be something that stopped them from being with you...
If you look at it ... It's a good measuring stick to see if the person you're intrested in actually cares for you. If the answer was to be no, then it's probably better that they aren't going to be in your life anyway!
Great story ...
S
Sassy2543 Talullah
Posted
It's good to hear that people are overcoming this minor nuisance every day. I've even noticed that having GH has influenced me to change my diet, drink less alcohol, and see a guy for the kind of man he is on the inside and not just how good looking he is....so who's to say that this isn't a blessing in disguise?!
My only concern is the transmission of it. I still don't quite understand the likelihood of transmitting it to my boyfriend because the research seems to vary so much on the internet. It's my only concern and fear.
I'm glad that everything is working out! Keep your head up!
Talullah Sassy2543
Posted
Regarding the research - I've read a couple of sites that say you are contagious ALL of the time but if I think about my marriage - I was married for 26 years and started with only cold sores. I think I passed it on to my ex through oral sex (but who knows, maybe he already had a dormant virus from his previous girlfriends!) and then I started lesions genitally quite a few years later. But in all the time of our marriage, he never had a cold sore. The research seems to say that you will pass the infection on from the site of your outbreak to where your skin contacts the other person's - really bad english, sorry. So through kissing, during sex, I never passed it on to him because I was very careful when I felt the tingle start, not to kiss him or my children and neither of them have cold sores either.
I think the main answer is to just be super-vigilante and not do anything intimate the minute you just feel slightly anything down there. Good luck for the future.
Sassy2543 Talullah
Posted
As for the transmission, I feel like you can still transfer it when you don't have symptoms, but the risk is low. My doctor didn't do blood work to see if I had hsv 1 or 2 but I'm thinking that it's 2. I'm still getting used to the idea of having it so sex is uncomfortable to me right now due to my fears. I especially don't allow him to perform oral on me even though he really wants to. I will get to the point when it's comfortable again, especially since I'm taking daily suppressants.... it will just take time.
toni24814 Sassy2543
Posted
I would like a website that gives specific information about Herpes and sexual activity. What exactly can one do or not do with GH. By the way my partner is waiting on his test results from his doctor as well.
ashlyn3328 Talullah
Posted
Talullah ashlyn3328
Posted
lindsay58733 Talullah
Posted
debs35500 Talullah
Posted
This year I've had a shock to the system. In short, got GH in late teens, been completely OB-free for 20+ yrs including marriage of over 10 yrs. Marriage broke down a few years ago. Out of the blue I met a lovely guy. However after a few months with him I got my first - bad - OB and have been struggling with them ever since (triggered with sex it seems). It knocked me for six (cruel joke!) and brought all the horrible feelings back but I too was able to be upfront with my man. I was also really happily surprised to find he wasn't that bothered - I had expected it would mean the end. Still struggling to get things under control and it's really not easy but we're still together