I do not feel in control

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I've been struggling with some recent thing- mostly mood swings, numbness, My grades have been falling, I've been having suicidal thoughts and actively want to act upon them but never have because I just end up calling myself a coward Yada Yada yada- but what I came here to talk about is I dont feel in control I just feel like - i'm following a schedule - i have no say in my life - and in my emotions- I dont feel happy anymore - I feel nothing and everything at the same time lol. if I feel anything at all its always sadness or anger and when i do feel happy- it vanishes as soon as the moment is over. I'm not in control and I need help please please please help me- my phone will soon be taken away due to my falling grades but its the only thing keeping me alive right now- I'm starting to think I have clinical depression but what if I'm faking it.

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  • Edited

    i’m sorry you are feeling this way. from what you have said, it sounds like you are definitely experiencing depression. It may also be mixed in with anxiety because they both often go hand-in-hand.

    You need some support right now. Are you able to talk to your parents about this? If not, speak with a school counselor. Your talk with the counselor is confidential and he or she could provide you with support and some resources to help you feel better again.

    if you are able to talk with your parents, tell them exactly what’s going on and how you are feeling.

    I really do suggest that you get some counseling for this. It’s very difficult to try to do alone. it’s very important to treat depression.

    Please remember that this doesn’t have to be a lifelong thing. If you get the help, you can look back on this one day and be glad that you did.

    This is just a small snippet of time in your life. Remember that! Nothing last forever.

    sometimes when we are in one phase of life we think it’s going to be that way forever. Life is about change and nothing stays the same. There’s always hope. There’s always help available.

    you are not a coward. A coward would actually take their own life. You are someone that knows deep down that you want to turn things around and feel better and have a good life. That’s the opposite of a coward. by doing things such as getting some support, taking care of yourself, you are your own hero.

    you tube has some very motivational videos you could watch. there’s a guy named david goggins who had a horrible childhood and he is an ex Navy seal. He gives very motivational talks! He talks about how we have to push forward no matter what! Very no nonsense guy. You might enjoy some of his videos on YouTube!

    So see if you can talk to your parents first. see if they will set you up for some counseling which I really hope they do! you really need to vent to somebody who can help you! Don’t keep all this bottled up.

    speak with a school counselor. just take one day at a time. If you do get to go to regular counseling, stay with it even when you start to feel better. And take care of your health. Eat healthy, get some exercise because that will help lift depression. ❤❤❤

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