I don't feel like myself. Feedback please.

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I'm 17 and I'm currently a senior. I've suffered from anxiety and depression from about a year but I guess it's at it's peak right now. This is the first time I'm telling anyone this. I don't feel like myself anymore. Almost like something else has taken over me(anxiety). All day I have a constant battle with a voice in my head and I can never seem to quiet it or win. It makes me think of in ordinary thoughts like when I'm in public I think that everyone's making fun of me or all plotting on me. I hate it so that usually refrains me from going out. Like honestly I don't even go to school anymore, I use to go out with my friends a lot and know I just cut them all off because of my accusations. I have no motivation in life anymore, I just feel numb. I use to be so optimistic and now I can't even get out of the house. Nothing even interest me anymore. It's also really hard for me to show any emotion but my head is bubbled with all kinds of emotion. I try to show emotion to my family and I still feel disconnected that's why I can't even tell my mom about how I feel and why I'm like this. I try to be nice and socialize to people but I always get the same reaction like their making fun of me and I just feel alone. Hopefully I'm not the only one.

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  • Posted

    Paranoia and disconnection and all that you mention are typical symptoms of anxiety depression, it ain't your fault!

    Being nice to people and socializing suggests you are a sensitive, caring person which by your nature makes you feel vulnerable when you are down.

    It sounds trite to say 'you are not alone' but it is a fact and you will find that when people know what you are going through, that is when they may reveal they are suffering or have suffered the same. People that never have this problem often do not make good confidants as they say things like 'cheer up, it might never happen'- not helpful at all!

    Continue you search for someone who is similarly affected- sharing will help!

    Also there will be members of staff at your school that are trained to listen to you- find them, talk to them to ease the burden of your thoughts.

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  • Posted

    celinenicette96, I've been where you are, but I was much older than you so I can only assume it has to be really difficult for you.  Below are some ideas that may help you that have worked many others and some of these also helped me. 

    1st get up out of bed and showered and dressed and put on your makeup. It does not matter if you are going out or not. Just do it and you will feel better just doing this. 

    Next, eat something healthy...with NO SUGAR...like fruit and or veggies and fruit and an egg...no cereal. Drink green tea without sugar...I drink the Diet Arizona Green tea. It's sweet, but has no sugar. Or I drink regular tea or just plain bottled water.

    Next go online .You need someone to talk to. So do keep coming to here and find other boards where you can actually chat about your depression. To find the other boards, go to Google and put in a search for [depression, teenager, chat (or message board)]. Look at the posts and only stay if you feel comfortable with the people who are posting. You want to find a board where people are giving ideas of what worked for them. Yes it's good that people post how they feel, but it's also very important that people tell what has worked for them. 

    Next message boards are a great help, but talking with someone who is right there with you, someone who will be emphatic is ultra important.  If a member of your family is emphatic & understanding and will listen, no matter how long or when you need to talk, then do consider telling that person, so they can support you when you are feeling down.

    Next  I urge you to tell your medical Dr. He/she can't tell anyone you've talked to them, unless you tell them to and your Dr. can give you referals and meds 9If you need them...but do look at natural ways of getting over depression, on the web. 

      As for school...well..neither did I like it very much until I was much much older. I hated school...but I've also learned that was because I had learning difficulties. So going to school and the pressure from my parents to get great grades was really difficult. Once I found out how to deal with my learning problem, school became much more fun, but sadly I didn't learn that until I was much older.

    .

    As for your mood...are you eating or drinking anything with sugar? I'll bet you are...most people do. Stop eating any sugar and get off the carbs(breads, cookies, chips, cake,...that sort of thing that is made with flour) i. Both cause all levels of depression and the feelings of not being interested in anything and the feeling of just wanting to veg. I know this to be a fact. I still fight it all the time. Try eating strawberries, blue berries, watermelon, and applesauce....to satisfy  the need for sweets. Try eating baked a whole baked yam (it's full of vitamins that I'll bet you are low in) Try swapping out red meat for ground turkey or chicken. Try sugar free jello. If you don't like taking vitmin pills, try drinking a product that has lots of vitamins and B12 in it with no sugar...Zip Fiz (you can get it at health food stores or Costco and at some drug stores). Call around and see who has it. Also instead of any kind of soda drinks, try flavored tea with stevia (for sweetness) & or green tea. I like the diet Arazona green tea, that most grocery stores carry

    .

    All these things add up to your recovery from depression. For the most part, no one thing will make you all better. It will take you doing various things.....and the sum of those is what will make you better. 

    There are a number of herbs that will help you, but I'm not going to suggest them as you need to read up on what herbs will help you and make your own choice as to which to try, but if you do try any herb, give it at least 7 days to work. Some work within 15 min. Others may take a week or so. 

    Again, you really need to tell your Dr. so he/she can help you get better help. I'm quite certain they will recommend you to a psychologist (or therapist). Finding a therapist that you feel comfortable with, is a bit of a challenge. So know that you might have to try a few different therapists. My self, I would go to an AMA approved psychologist who specialized in depression and who is currently working with other teens. By the time you get to this point you will be much further down the road to recovery, but do still go to talk with the therapist. Don't be surprised if your Dr. wants to give you meds. With many depressed people, the fastest way to get them back on the road to recovery is with medication for a short time. 

    1) .Know you can get past this, just tell yourself over and over that you feel better and more in control. Repeat this at least 5 times every waking hour. 

    2) On 5-10 pieces of paper hand write..."I'm making my life better" then tape those pieces of paper where ever your eyes look the most...I'd put 1 in the bathroom on the mirror, on your bedside lamp, on your mirror in the bedroom, 1 next to the light switch into your closet, 1 on the refrigerator....you get the idea.  

    3) Find someone to talk to (a friend or an adult you like & trust) also at the same time, start to work on your diet. Get off the sugar and carbs (breads cookies, cakes, chips) as well as get off candy and  ice cream. All those things will just make you feel worse. If possible just go on an all vegie and fruit diet for a week. I think doing that alone will bring you some relief.

    4) Look online and find chat sites and or other message boards where their main focus is depression. Be sure to come back and let us know how you are doing.

    5) Go to your Dr. and get a referral to psychologist or therapist. Look that person(s) up on the Internet. See if you think you'd feel comfortable with them and if they have treated depression and teens. If their major focus of their practice is not treating depression, then move on & look for another Dr.If by some chance your Dr. won't give you a recommendation or money is a problem, then you can always call the county. Most counties have free medical help...which includes psychologist in most states.

     There's tons more I could tell you about depression, but I don't' want to overwhelm you, so do start with the things above..

    Good Luck....I'm quite sure you can get better, with just a bit of effort from your self. 

     

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  • Posted

    Hi, I left a long post 3 hours ago that I think will be very helpful, but the moderater has not yet reviewed it, but hopeully it will be done soon. I'll send them a message & ask how long before it's posted. Having been thru many of the same problems you are going thru, I've learned a number of things that can help...but for now...hang in there...help is on the way
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  • Posted

    celinenicette96, I've been where you are, but I was much older than you so I can only assume it has to be really difficult for you. Here are some ideas that may help you that have worked many others and some of these also helped me. 

    1st get up out of bed and showered and dressed and put on your makeup. It does not matter if you are going out or not. Just do it and you will feel better just doing this. 

    Next, eat something healthy...with NO SUGAR...like fruit and or veggies and fruit and an egg...no cereal. Drink green tea without sugar...I drink the Diet Arizona Green tea. It's sweet, but has no sugar. 

    Next go online .You need someone to talk to. So do keep coming to here, and find other boards where you can actually chat about your depression. To find the other boards, go to Google and put in a search for [depression, teenager, chat (or message board)]. Look at the posts and only stay if you feel comfortable with the people who are posting

    Next  talking with someone who is right there with you, someone who will be emphatic is ultra important.  If a member of your family is emphatic & upstanding and will listen, no matter how long or when you need to talk, then do consider telling that person, so they can support you when you are feeling down.

    Next  I urge you to tell your medical Dr. He/she can't tell anyone you've talked to them, unless you tell them to.

      As for school...well..neither did I like school much until I was much much older. I hated school...but I've also learned that was because I had learning difficulties. So going to school and the pressure from my parents & teachers to get great grades was really difficult. Once I found out how to deal with my learning problem, school became much more fun, but sadly I didn't learn that until I was much older.

    .As for your mood...are you eating or drinking anything with sugar? I'll bet you are...most people do. Stop eating any sugar and get off the carbs(breads, cookies, chips, cake,...that sort of thing that is made with flour) i. Both cause all levels of depression and the feelings of not being interested in anything and the feeling of just wanting to veg. I know this to be a fact. I still fight it all the time. Try eating strawberries, blue berries, watermelon, and applesauce....to satisfy  the need for sweets. Try eating baked a whole baked yam (it's full of vitamins that I'll bet you are low in) Try swapping out red meat for ground turkey or chicken. Try sugar free jello. If you don't like taking vitamin pills, try drinking a product that has lots of vitamins and B12 in it with no sugar...Zip Fiz (you can get it at health food stores or Costco and at some drug stores). Call around and see who has it. Also instead of any kind of soda drinks, try flavored tea with stevia (for sweetness) & or green tea. I like the diet Arizona green tea, that most grocery stores carry

    .All these things add up to your recovery from depression. For the most part, no one thing will make you all better. It will take you doing various things.....and the sum of those is what will make you better. 

    There are a number of herbs that will help you, but I'm not going to suggest them as you need to read up on what herbs will help you and make your own choice as to which to try, but if you do try any herb, give it at least 7 days to work. Some work within 15 min. Others may take a week or so. 

    Again, you need to talk with someone you feel comfortable with (a friend, but preferable an adult you respect and trust)  Next you really need to tell your Dr. so he/she can help you get better help. I'm quite certain they will recommend you to a psychologist (or therapist). Finding a therapist that you feel comfortable with, is a bit of a challenge. So know that you might have to try a few different therapists. My self, I would go to an AMA approved psychologist who specialized in depression and who is currently working with other teens. By the time you get to this point you will be much further down the road to recovery, but do still make sure you go to a therapist. You need to get to root of why this happened and you need to learn how to deal with it if it ever comes up again.I can almost promise you that if you don't learn the cause and how to deal with various feelings this will happen again.. Don't be surprised if your Dr. wants to give you meds. With many depressed people, the fastest way to get them back on the road to recovery is with medication for a short time. there's tons more I could tell you about depression, but I don't' want to overwhelm you, so do start with the things above..

     

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    • Posted

      I appreciate your advice so much you don't know what it means to me.  I have talked to a doctor and went to this group type therapy which didn't work out because I'm shy but I guess the cause of all my anxiety and depression was bullying in school that's why I can't trust anyone. The doctor put me on Zoloft which did not help me at all it just made me feel like a complete zombie and didn't help so I just stopped taking it. I don't want to depend on medication, I don't like the idea of me being artificially happy either idk. I've heard about natural remedies/herbs for anxiety and depression but there's so many. If you know of any goods ones can you list them?
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    • Posted

      celinenicette96 , I've been in very similar positions as you are. I know how it is to be shy and bullied and to be unwilling to trust. As for the meds the Dr. put you on, for most people they have to try a few to find which on works the best for them. So tell your Dr. what you've told us here about how the meds are making  you feel. I know of a number of other meds he could try and I'm sure he will, but if he's not recommended a therapist by now, you need to call him and ask for a list of therapists that you can see. Then you need to look up each person on the web and read about them and form an opinion as to which  you would feel most comfortable with and go see that therapist. Maybe to start you should see a psychiatrist. They can prescribe drugs where other therapists can't.  You need to accept and understand this is going to take some time to get well. It takes time for meds to work and it takes time for therapy to work. I will give you the name of some other web sites and you can go there and read and ask questions about which herbs would work best for you. What works for me, may not work the same for you because of the age difference. At different ages our minds and bodies will react differently to all kinds of meds, food, drink, stress, anger, etc. I understand that a group doesn't work for everyone. I personally wouldn't feel comfortable with a group, but I know others who are glad to be in a group. Every one is different and that's a very good thing. Wouldn't' t it be boring if we were all the same? As for natural meds, well the very 1st thing is to eat all organic foods. Get off any sugar and stop eating carbs ASAP...right now!. Eat lots of veggies and fruits and nuts. Brazil nuts are great to help you handle stress and anxiety. Stop eating red meat and fried foods and luncheon meats and any baked foods or sweets. Eat fish, chicken, and turkey....but not if they are prepackaged sandwich meats. Eat only fresh ones. Don't eat any fried foods. Everyone's mind as well as their physical body are affected by food, some people don't' realize that, but it's true and there are many studies that show this to be the case. Maybe you are super sensitive to foods and they may cause you to feel depressed. I know lot of candy and a few other things will do that to me.  It's also true of my husband, my Dad, and my sons. Various foods cause me to have brain fog, or feel terribly shaky or very edgy, some will affect my kidneys badly, some affect my heart badly, some affect my joints and muscles badly. So I'm on an all organic diet and I only drink bottled water and tea. I feel much better doing this and I really think it will help you too. BTW don't take any herbs without telling your Dr. since you are on an RX or hopefully  you soon will be on an RX that works for you. You need to know that various RXs may not mix well with certain herbs.So be really sure to tell your Dr. and read yourself on the net about what you are taking or thinking about taking before you take them. Also do the other things I've suggested, they really do work. 1 more thing I forgot to mention, do exercise. I do 1.5 hrs a day. 1/2 hr of fast walking around the park and 1 hr of concentrated exercise. It's a well known fact that doing exercise will help stop depression and it it alone could cause depression to totally lift. I personally know it for a fact that exercise works. Good Luck and do post and let us know how things are going for you.
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    • Posted

      I forgot to mention this....have you told your Dr. that you quit taking the RX? If not and if you quit cold turkey, that's a very big mistake because you and anyone taking an antidepressant who suddenly quits, are very likely to get a severe backlash and be more depressed than ever. Never never stop any drug like these all of a sudden. You have to taper off and your Dr. can tell you how to do this. Also read about this on the net. Your very best weapon against a number of things in life is to be educated. So again, if you've not told your Dr., call him, in the morning, that is if you feel you can wait. If you are feeling super depressed, call him ASAP...do not wait. IF you can't get thru to him, call a hospital and there are hot lines for people who are deeply depressed. If you need them, use them...you can remain anonymous. This is important..OK? Let me know how you are doing. I really do want to know.
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  • Posted

    Read your post.  I know it's an old post and was wondering how you are doing.

    I'm sure you have spoken with a professional and hoped it has helped. The

    way I'm interperterting your post is, you developed a social anxiety disorder.

    You feel like everyone is judging, making fun of, looking at you. I feel the same

    way as you. I brought this disorder out by using hallucinogenic drugs. One day

    I was popular as hell,  the next day I flipped out and didn't want to be around anyone. I call this, "the day I changed". This disorder would have taken care of itself if I didn't use drugs, now that I brought it out, I have to deal with it. I walk around like a paranoid freak, always looking to see if anyone is looking at me.

    This is just a post to let you know that you are not alone.

     

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  • Posted

    Hi

    I have the exact same feeling. Let me know if you still have them and we can talk on it a bit.

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  • Posted

    Hello, I was at the same point two weeks ago when I went to go see my doctor for the first time, he diagnosed me with an anxiety disorder, major depressive disorder and alcoholism. Then he perscribed me Zoloft (sertraline) which is an antidepressant, I had a horrible paradoxical reaction to it and it sent me into a horrendous depression and I mean HORRENDOUS! I didn't eat, sleep, or do anything I used to be able to do.. It scared the life out of me. I tried everything, forcing my self to eat, exercising, tried to do normal things nothing worked.. My doc said that there was another med he wanted to try Zyprexa which is an antipsychotic. I felt weird because I wasn't cazy? And I didn't want to have another horrible reaction... I was so deprecate for relief I tried it and I feel so much better now! In days! I am also starting to go to counseling to address the anxiety issues I had before I took that initial medication that sent me into this horrible depression.. Maybe ask your doc? Or try a medication if you can't get relief soon.. So sorry to hear you're dealing with this because trust me I know it's the worst most scary feeling in the world. 😞 Good luck to you..
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