I feel like im losing my mind.

Posted , 4 users are following.

I literally feel like I am losing my mind, but first...

I'm 24 years old, I have a girl that loves me, I've felt with anxiety before not I don't think ever this bad. I started having dizzy spells which I thought were anxiety in the beginning of February. They came and went with my Ativan, I took them here and there. Valentines day is when it started. I started to feel really dizzy then the panic set in, I took .5 ativan and that didn't help. So I went to the ER. They told me it was anxiety and an ear infection, gave me bactrim for my ear, I took about 3 doses from it and stopped because it made me feel bad. I was still having all this anxiety and dizziness, went to the ER again twice, one said ear looked fine and it was vertigo, the other said anxiety and I was dehydrated and pumped me with fluid. So after that my gf and I drove back to Arizona (from Michigan) of course I was still having dizziness and anxiety. I got back here, still feeling the symptoms so about a week of being here I went to the ER. CT came back normal, as did the blood work, and urine test. The only thing was my heart rate was up because of my anxiety. They told me it was my anxiety and let me go. I kept having the feelings of dizziness and anxiety so I went to an urgent care doc, he did the same tests on me and told me I have labyrinthitis. So he gave me prednisone, azthromycin, and more ativan. I didn't feel comfortable taking the steroid so I didn't, I took the azthromycin even though it made me feel weird the first night I took the first dose. It was a 5 day script, 2 the first day and 1 a day after that. I felt dizzy still and anxious of course, I finshed it and felt a little better and then it came back, the dizziness hit me hard along with lack of sleep, anxiety, and weird dreams. So I went back AGAIN and he gave me the same thing but told me this time take the steroid, so I did. It hasn't been long since I finished the azthromycin so instead of taking the 2 that first day I just took one. I took the prednisone Wednesday morning and by Wednesday night I started freaking out bad. Shaking, couldn't sit still, sweating out of my hands and feet, rapid heart beat, more dizzy than what I was, it was giving me a panic attack so of course my body went into a full panic thinking I was dying so I took an ativan and talked to a family member over the phone. I calmed down and was able to sleep, still having all these weird thoughts and dreams. Then yesterday after waking up, I was feeling really really REALLY odd.. It was like I was in full panic attack STILL!! I could barely stand up without getting dizzy, I talked to a doctor and the pharmacist and both told me to quit taking Prednisone. I took a dose of azthromycin and could only get down a pb&j and a glass of water before I started freaking out again, I went and laid down and by 5 pm I couldn't take it, I took an ativan. I finally was able to calm down with the exception of feeling a little anxious. I fell asleep for a hour or so maybe less, woke up panicing a little but calmed myself down and sat up for a bit, the rest of the night I felt fine. I was able to get up and move around, still feeling a little dizzy though, made some food and drank some water. Then laid back down for a bit and fell asleep. Its not the second day since I've taken that horrible drug, I'm not feeling as bad. I woke up with a headache, and a little anxious. I tried going back to sleep, and I kept having weird mental images. I can't remember whay exactly, plus I hear chatter (not voices) and my thoughts go crazy, it freaks me out. It literally wakes me up and makes me feel like I'm losing my mind, like I'm going to end up schizophrenic and I'll never be myself again. I'm pretty terrified. I feel a little better after I relax and stay away, my head hurts and my feet and hands and sweating again. I haven't tried to get out of bed yet, I don't want a repeat of yesterday. I don't know what to do. Could this still be the steroid? The pharmacist and doc said it could take a couple days for it to leave my system. I only took 2, 10 mg tablets as it was directed. Never again will I touch it. Help?

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  • Posted

    My son has schizophrenia. You have good self awareness. He had none. I'm sure you don't have SZ but please think about seeing a psychiatrist to rule out a mental disorder. It could be due to a drug reaction.

    Aside from this post - I keep telling people to stay away from grass as if you have a predisposition to psychiatric illness the chemicals in Maryjane can trigger psychosis/paranoia and even schizophrenia, as in my son's case. He used to smoke a lot of grass as a teen and by the age of 21 he was diagnosed with schizophrenia.  He developed paranoia, anxiety, could not sleep and went downhill after that- had a complete psychotic break by age 21. He's now 35 and still a very sick young man.  Sad story.  I'm against legalizing grass because it can be a gateway drug and it can also trigger pyshiatric illness if one is predisposed to it. 

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    • Posted

      I don't do anything. I don't even drink. Everyone keeps saying it's just my anxiety. I've had bad anxiety and the lab set it off worse, now this episode with the steroid really set it off. I'm feeling better than I did yesterday but still not myself By far, I keep thinking that I'm going crazy. Its obnoxious, if I take an ativan I'm fine. I just try not to because of how fast you can get addicted to them. It could just be really really bad anxiety and I hope and pray that's all it is.

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    • Posted

      I'm glad you're feeling better. Just hang onto the positive and dismiss the negative thoughts. You are not going crazy. If you were you would not know you were. My son had no self awareness. It took others to say "something is going on with you" and he'd deny it. He said he had superpowers and never felt better.  

      I'm reading a book: "The Four Agreements" and it talks about thoughts being like black and light magic. Dark thoughts breed dark magic and light thoughts, positive thoughts breed white magic. If you fear something it will grow. If you face it down, it will diminish. Knowing you are getting relief from ativan is good, really good. Keep a journal and list all the good things in your life. Everyday add something to it. Focus on what is good and working in your life and this will help while you heal.

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    • Posted

      I had everything you had matey and more,the dizziness drove me up the wall. The lack of sleep made it ten times worse. You've got to come to terms with the fact that anxiety is the reason for your symptoms,you won't get better until you do. My coordination suffered,I was forever tripping over,my vision become so impaired I locked myself out of the house because I was unable to find the lock. A family member also suffered from anxiety,she became that weak should couldn't hold a can of hairspray and press the button at the same time,this ain't no feeble female,she's a landscape gardener who has bigger muscles than most men. Anxiety will screw with your mind if you let it.Keep active,exercise and stop googling your symptoms,as you'll drive yourself demented. I overcome anxierty and so can you. Good luck
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  • Posted

    I can not take cortisone for this exact reason. It made me feel totally crazy, and increased the anxiety. Surely there is an alternative drug for those circumstances. One of my friends was on it, and called me to come get all the bunnies jumping around her bedroom. Of course there were none, so I called the ambulance. They said it was because of the steroid. If the Ativan is helping, keep taking as needed. Good luck!!
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    • Posted

      Well, thankfully I didn't see any bunnies. I bet she has a good laugh at that now I hope. Yeah, that was the scariest experience I've ever had other than my first panic attack, and now this horrible dizziness WITH anxiety. Its the worst. sad I was on the steroid to bring the inflammation down in my ear so the antibiotics can work. I only took the first dose and that was it, so I'm PRAYING that they will still work because from what the doc said, the reason it didn't the first time is because I didn't take the steroid. So this is my second batch of azythromycin. Oh and apparently even though I couldn't back up her theory a doctor told me that azythromycin and pred interact. I don't know, all I know is this dizziness sucks and I just want to sleep.
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