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I find myself being like my father... I'm 34 but am being like my dad who at 45 died...alcohol

Posted , 10 users are following.

adam13691
adam13691

To see your hero (dad) suffer and then deterioate is hard, so why would I do the same,

0 likes, 12 replies

12 Replies

  • ADEfree
    ADEfree adam13691

    Posted

    It's often genetic, Adam. Some just have an exaggerated response to alcohol and it gets lodged in a part of the brain that we can't access or control too well (the "reward system"wink. It then proceeds to run our lives amok. 

    Here's what I did to overcome what my grandfather handed down to me:

    https://patient.info/health/sinclair-method-for-alcohol-use-disorder

    It is able to access that area of the brain and over a period of months (it took me about 5 months) deaddict your brain to alcohol. I now feel like I'd expect "normal" people feel about drinking, it's ok once in a while, but for the most part I don't care about it. If you have tried to quit before, tried to talk yourself out of it and just can't see why you keep on doing it, I suggest the above for the win. 

    • adam13691
      adam13691 ADEfree

      Posted

      I almost have a normal life...I work see to my kids but something always draws me back to the drink. Just in the evenings to unwind...this is the best I've been for years. Been in the priory which cost thousands, got myself together to some degree but wish I could just leave it alone. I've seen my old man die from it yet I still think I'm not like him...yet I know all the problems it's caused me over the last 15 years. 2 children I don't see...it's quite exhausting being a drinket

  • Misssy2
    Misssy2 adam13691

    Posted

    I would say it is hereditary.

    And with the knowledge you have of your Dad passing (and I'm sorry that has happened to you and your family)...and with this knowledge that alcohol can take your life...you have to pull from your soul to fight it.

    Your Dad is watching and doesn't want you to suffer the same fate as he did.

    I hope you are able to find the desire to not drink.

  • Richardt
    Richardt adam13691

    Posted

    How. much do u drink, be how many pints, spirits per day, so we can help.
  • Robin2015
    Robin2015 adam13691

    Posted

    I am the same..but my Dad joined the AA and stopped drinking for 16 years before he died of Alzheimers last year...had a good live..me...in Dec 2016 it will be 4 years without drinking...try to stop gradually..Robin
  • gwen45436
    gwen45436 adam13691

    Posted

    Absolutely hereditary.  My mum drank whiskey and hot water from 9.30pm till 12.00 every single night without fail.  She died at 84 and not alcohol related!  My sister died at 52 of a burst ulcer due to alcohol (she drank in the day when she could, then on to the evening).  My gran, though I was 10 at the time and did not realise anything, started off her morning brew with a top of whiskey.  Then throughout the day whenever she had a cuppa, in went the whiskey.  I thought that normal!!

    My hubs for years went out 3 nights a week with mates and drank 18 pints each session, then the other 4 days he drank his home brew in the house and I called him an alki during many of our rows.  But his mum and dad hardly drank.  His dad would have one single whiskey before bed and his usual glass of guinness before his Sunday lunch.

    Now my "alki" hubs is quite happy going all week without, or just having a glass before dinner then no more.  He still goes out 3 nights with his mates but not on 18 pints.  More like 6.

    So why have I turned out the "alki" - think you can guess.  I did not realise it was such a disease until I came on this site.  I now don't feel so ashamed, relieved actually.  But they have spurred me on to getting a grip on it.  Don't really want to go join Mum and Sis just yet.

    Loads of advice will come you way so don't give up; these guys absolutely know what they are talking about.

    Stay and join the family.

    G.

    • vickylou
      vickylou gwen45436

      Posted

      I'm sure it's hereditary. I was adopted at 6 weeks and my adoptive parents weren't drinkers. They had drink in the house but rarely drank.

      i managed to track down my biological family and discovered loads of relatives with AUD. Poteen (excuse spelling) was what my Irish relatives drank, brewed by themselves. Never tried it, but it's known for its high alcohol level. Apparently most would have it first thing in the morning, then work in the potato fields with the equivalent of a hip flask to top up during the day.

      The medical professionals I've seen do not agree with this at all. Infact I've been accused of using it as an excuse.

      my research has been the op positive, yes AUD can be hereditary.

    • vickylou
      vickylou

      Posted

      should say the opposite
    • gwen45436
      gwen45436 vickylou

      Posted

      Oh yes, I know of this drink, though I am not Irish, I am half Welsh.  Not sure if they make it with Leeks lol.

      You saying the Med Profs intimate you are using it as an excuse - I read an article some months back that said most doctors are 50% likely to have an AUD problem!!  I decided to try something out with my own Doctor who I would say is in her early forties.  I have come absolutely clean with her about my problem and I turned the appointment around and asked her about her drinking.  Well her face gave it away - yes she admitted to drinking and also said too much at times.  I asked her if she was told she could not drink again, how would she feel about it; her answer was - I would not be happy at all, I need it to relax!!!!!!!!!

      So there you go, we are not the only ones struggling - maybe her parents drink - who knows - but it is real and we fight it constantly, and we are honest. 

      Huggles for your Struggles guys..............G.

    • vickylou
      vickylou gwen45436

      Posted

      What a good idea lol! A lot of the medical profession suffer with AUD, and that's fact. I used to work in a hospital and have seen and experienced it first hand.

    • gwen45436
      gwen45436 vickylou

      Posted

      Hey so have I.  I used to work in Occupational Health at my local hospital, and the docs would come in daily.  They so often looked awul and red eyed, I did  not have a problem then, so did not really tune in to it.  It was a cleaner that once said to me of her concerns as to our Doctors and how we should look up to them.  But she was not happy and asked me to go with her to their living quarters which she cleaned, boy what a sight, empty bottles everywhere, and she said this was every day, she went in to clean.  There you go guys - we are struggling, but are open about it and just keep right on battling.

      Keep going and keep posting.

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