I have literally lost the ability to sleep, and am completely loosing my memory

ye I have been seeing my doctor, I just really think a ct scan will give me some peace of mind, I just dont know why I feel like I'm loosing every memory I have 

Sounds like tiredness 

The thing which mainly worries me is that my head literally feels numb, and I get pains from my head, I really feel like I have lost the ability to sleep and every day my thoughts become less clear and my imaginations are completely deteriating, I don't really feel like the medication works, because my head is so numb, I find it so hard now to picture thoughts in my head, just getting quite scared now, I haven't had proper sleep in three weeks now and don't really get the feeling of being tired, that's why I'm a bid concerned about brain damage

Dawn Did the doctor say what was causing this insomnia?

 

Thanks dawn, I will look into that medication, but do you feel like your'e completely loosing your memories because it is so bad for me now 

Yes, I was getting severe migraines, pain from spine damage, u need to have a good night time sleep routine and if u sleep during the day then this is the culprit for not sleeping on a night time. It will take song time to get a good sleep routine after along time of not sleeping. It took me a good few nights before I got any decent sleep. The Clomethiazole 192mg sleeping tablets will give u a head ache for the first few days but that's coz ur body isn't used to the tablets but that's a small price to pay til ur body gets used to them and no I'm not loosing my mind.

ok fair enough, thanks a lot for the advice I really appreciate it 

hey man ye, it sucks so much doesn't it, ye man, I feel like my body is ok and I can physically do things, but the ability to see images in my head is so vague which really affects remembering what I have done day by day, I get weird tingling pains in my haed and my head feels so numb, I feel as if my brain has close up and medications don't seem to do anything. 

Can you invisiion things in your head ok, or is it really faded and bad, also I was just wondering how you get into a sleep trail becasuse I really want to get one, and how you got the ct and MRI because I have persered so much for one, and they just won't give me one. How long has this been going on with for you, and how did it happen, do you know what triggered your sleeping problem. It would have been going on for a month on tuesday for me, but it all just seems like one big blurred mess, quite franly I don't know how I'm alive 

also when you go to sleep do you have the feeling that youv'e not actually been sleeeping but not sure, like I will awake if I have been sleeping at 6 pretty much every day without fail I feel like I'm never going to be able to invision memories like I used to, and end up a vegtable, is there any chance you can explain exactly how your'e memeory is to me 

Also my panic attak was triggered by a chest pain I was having, I was literally sitting on the sofa, watching a movie and I suddenly got this ringing in my ear, then my heart started beating really quickly like I was having a heart attack and there was nothing I could do to calm it down, I phoned 999 and they said go to A and E which I did, they checked me over and said I was fine, after that I managed to calm my heart down, but thay night everytime I tried going to sleep my body would jolt me a wake like a protective mechanism, thinking I was going to die if I fell asleep, this went on for 2 nights jolting awake then that just stopped, and I haven't really been able to sleeo since like I might be sleeping a bit but I don't know, but I feel if I was sleeping I wouldn't feel like this, it's so scard my memories and Imagination are what makes me me without them I'm nothing and am so scared, I was just wondering as well thw ability to clearly remember memories through images can that come back ? 

Anyway nice talking to you man and I look forward to hearing from you, I hope you start to feel better soon, and it's so nice to know I'm not alone with this 

Hi David.

No, you're not alone.

I dont understand why they wont give you either scan. The gp ordered the CT scan because a doctor i had to call out told me i had a mini stroke. The scan was to check for it. The MRI was to check the blood vessels etc and see if what was going on was because they thought it could be migraine related. That said tho, you said yours began with chest pain.

I'm in australia tho, so i'm not sure how they do things in the U.S (..?)

What i see in my head is blurred, kinda like a fast forward movie. Sometimes there is nothing, other times i might have a random picture. Everything runs together (sorry, not a good explanation) and i dont know what day it is as its all the same.

I've not been sleeping for as long as i can remember, at least 20years. As time wore on, they told me i only need a nap here and there, but thats crap! Everyone has to sleep and everyone has to have rem or it messes with their head and other functions.

My sleep stopped when my Grandmother died, and a few years later someone tried to break into my house and things got worse.

The gp kept telling me i was sleeping without knowing so to prove him wrong, i borrowed a video camera and recorded myself over a few nights. The doctor called me an idiot so i went to another. He gave me sleeping pills that didn't help.

I got into the sleep trial by telling a different doctor i kept falling asleep without warning.

He checked me for narcolepsy but discovered that i dont sleep, or cant sleep.

Yes, i feel like i haven't slept when i do manage a nap here or there. Its because i'm not asleep long enough or deep enough to feel any different.

I assume you are sleeping, just not like everyone else. You'll probably find you "nap" for 10-30mins once in a while but dont realize it because its not a sleep. Thats why you feel like you havent.

I go to bed and lay there. They told me to take clocks etc out of the room so i'm not aware of the time but i put them back so i know how long i "sleep" for.

I can look at the clock and close my eyes; drift off and wake up again anywhere between 5 and 30mins.

I know its easy for me to say try not to worry or stress because it doesn't help you.

I know what its like to be where you are, and feel how you feel, but try to put the problem aside and it may improve a little. It may not go back to before the night on the couch, but it may improve.

I used to drive myself crazy and then i got no sleep at all. A nap every few weeks is better than none at any point. At least thats what i found.

My daughter also has the same problems but she deals with it better than i ever did. Maybe she learnt by watching, i dont know, but she's doing okay and just accepts it as her normal; which is how i get through it now.

You asked about memories returning... If we are experiencing the same thing, then yes, your memories will return. You won't end up a vegetable either. But you have to try to not think about it and look at it as you slept or you didn't.

I can't explain the tingling, except to ask if you had any type of accident before the tingling began? Maybe something happened that damaged nerve endings...? Have you been checked for anaemia? This also causes tingling and numbness, especially in severe cases.

Do you live alone? (not to be nosey)

I'm sorry i probably didn't answer your question about how my memory is, but that's because i'm unsure what you mean. Are you asking how it was when i was spinning out looking for answers, or how it is now? I forget things easily, ask questions twice, forget i watch movies...stuff like that.

You said your brain feels like it has closed. Can you explain how?

Also, do you mind if i ask your age?

If you have any questions you think i might be able to help with, ask away. I can't promise i'll know the answer but if i can help, i will.

I hope you feel better, David. I know how you feel but at least you know you're not the only one and can ask questions thst can, hopefully, be answered by someone who actually suffers through it with you.

Take care and keep in touch.

Feel better soon.

May I butt in briefly. I was wondering about diet. I would suggest getting a full blood screening as well.

Hey man, Australia is such an amazing place and I really want to visit, I'm from the UK, England to be precise by the way, thank you so much for answering so many questions for me. 

I just feel like, what I have no one has to the extent I do, for instance it's getting so bad, remembering what I did yesterdsay is quite a hard task and invisiioning it is so hard and has progressively got worse, for insvtance I read what you said and then have to go over it again and again to remember the information you said. 

It's quite hard to put loosing my memory aside when it's affevcting my day to day life to such an extenct I feel like soon I'm not going to be able to form a cognitive sentence, I really feel like this is what is going to kill me, to put into exact details how my memory feels, it's so hard to invision anything in my head now, so I ca barely even remember what I did yesterday, I just feel like soon, I'm not going to be able to do anyhting and be completely gone. 

To answer youre question on if I live alone, Iv'e just fininshed my degree where I lived in halls for the 1 year and the last 2 years in a house with friends, I'm am currently living at home but hoping to do my masters in computer science, but don't think I will be able to due to this problem,

To answer your quesion on feeling like my head has closed up, about 11 days after the incedent, I just felt like my brain closed up and I lost the ability to sleep, that's how I feel I'm 22. Can you fully remember what you do day by day and invision it well, becaise I'm struggling so hard now. 

I feel like it's going to be all ober soon  

thanks a lot man, it's a good idea 

I'm butting in too - just to say I'm so glad David has found such a helpful poster as Alwaysalone.

Hi David.

I wrote a post earlier it vanished so i'll gove it another go and leave out the spaces.

I'm in Perth but love the UK, always have since i was really young. Always wanted to go there but know i never will.

No thanks required; i'm happy to help and answer any questions if i can.

I totally understand what you mean when you say you needed to re-read the posts. I find it hard to recall any information given to me and always ask for paperwork or emails so i can go back over it because i can't remember what i need to. Every so often, tho, i do remember bits and pieces.

I have trouble remembering minutes before, days, even weeks, but i can recall things from months and many years ago. For example, i forget i ask questions, and that they're answered, but i can remember things from when i was about 2yrs old. I also forget watching movies, but i use that as a good thing and think along the lines of, ok...a new movie to watch.

I drive my kids mad asking the same questions over and over, others just think i'm mad or have old timers disease (alzeimers).

After a while i do remember things, but short term; like minutes, hours, days, is hard to recall, as you know.

Some memories have never returned, but most have.

No, i can't fully envision what i do over a day. I can recall bits and pieces, but that's about it. Sometimes tho, at a later stage i can.

I find it hard to talk to people because i can't recall words. I usually stand and think for a bit and then say, "sorry, can't think of it right now", and use other words instead - unless i forget what i'm talking about (which also happens alot).

In school i excelled in english, now i have so much trouble with it.

It can take me weeks to write a letter or email, and then i wonder why i wrote what i did when i go back to try to complete it.

I used to spinout like you and think and feel the same, and a part of me still does, but the worst part was that no-one believed me and would or could help me so i gave up so much.

Please, David, don't give up on your masters. I can garrentee you will regret it once you are able to put this in the back of your mind and find a way to co-exist with it.

I'm not about to tell you it'll be easy as it was hard as hell for me, but now i just accept that i can't change it and on the whole i have the majority of my memories, and over time a lot do come back. Also, as i told you in an earlier post, my daughter has the same thing and she is okay with it and just takes it as a hiccup of sorts.

I have a couple of friends that stutter - one very badly and the other has a couple of attempts and then just stops and speaks when he thinks he can say the word. I feel like him, or should i say i've adopted his way somewhat. If i can't recall a word, i just stop talking for a bit, and if the word doesn't get there, that's when i apologize for not recalling it.

Have you tried writing? Just plain old writing. How you feel, what you think, what you hate...just writing? I found it helps a little. I don't always remember writing the stuff i re-read, but i found it helps a little for me.

I wish i could make you feel better but only you can decide whether to put it in the back of your mind and try to co-exist with it.

I can...and will...answer any questions you ask, if i can because i know what it's like to be in your situation. It's horrible, scary as f**k and worse when no-one can give you answers.

A question i meant to ask before is have you been given or taken any meds for the tingling or anything else?

I really hope you feel better soon, David, and try not to think about it.

The problems feed off fear, and the more you fear, the less you remember.

I know that from personal experience.

Most of all tho, please, please don't give up on your masters. You may find being engulfed in something you look forward to and enjoy will help as well.

Once again, i'm only a question or two away. I'll try to help as much as i can.

Take care, David, and try not to worry and think about it. (Yes, i know, easier said than done. But it can be done because i did it)

Talk to you soon.

Thank you, Lily (?).

I appreciate your butt-in.

I had no-one to help me and no-one had any answers; they still don't seem to, but i know what it's like feeling so alone and like i'm the only one affected.

If i can help, i will.

Hopefully i can.

Thanks so much man for all the advice, but I really don't think this is something I'm going to recover from, I feel like I'm completely loosing my mind now and all cognitive thought, I completely understand everything your'e saying and please don't take this personally in any way, but I really don't feel like what your'e suffering from is the same as me, I just don't know what to do anymore I am completely in despair and feel like this is the end now, I can barely think any more and really struggling to process information in any way shape and form, I don't want to loose my mind but I feel like that's what's happeing I don't feel tired I almost feel nothing now, and things just keep getting worse day by day, I have no clue what to do anymore, I appreciate all the advice you have given me, but I am in complete dispair now

David, that feeling that you're never going to recover and you're going to lose your mind, or even die, is common in people going through periods of sleeplessness. But in fact, people don't die or go crazy through not sleeping. They feel terrible, but they eventually start napping for short periods through sheer exhaustion, often without realising it.

I know it's hard, but try not to give in to those thoughts, as they will throw you into a worse cycle of despair, which is in itself the enemy of sleep.

hey lilly, I know what your'e saying but when you feel like your'e loosing the ability to even remember your'e family and everything you do day by day it's hard to have hope, my head feels so numb and I feel completelty confused now, I feel like Iv'e barely even slept in a month, every single day my memory gets worse 

David. I understand what you're saying and how you're thinking, but you also have to remember you've had no sleep and therefore can't think straight.

As i've said, and as 6lily has also said in response to your most recent post, you're feeling like you're feeling because of lack of sleep.

You're not going to lose your mind and you're not going to die.

And you probably are napping every so often without realizing it because it's not a long or deep sleep.

You have to try to forget that you're not sleeping the eight or whatever hours. Get it out of your mind and the less you stress, the easier it will be to recognise that you probably are napping and then normal sleep will eventually follow - not necessarily every night, but there will be sleeps.

You're allowing your fear (which i understand completely) take over your rationality and because you're spinning out so much, it's becoming more of an issue.

I know it is an issue, but your fear is feeding irrationality.

What has your doctor/s said?

I can only tell you my experience and i began like you. I now survive on a bit of sleep every few weeks, and even then, most times it feels like i haven't slept at all; but i know i have, if only through sheer exhaustion.

I wish i could do more for you. I'm sorry i can't.

I hope you can find a way to ignore the worst and let your mind wander to other things to forget what you're driving yourself crazy over.

Keep in touch and try not to worry about things that you only think will happen.

Thanks so much man, Ive calmed down a little now, I know what I need to do, but it's just so hard to do, I just hate trying to remember what Iv'e done in a day, that's just what scars me the mosy, the doctors have just said about trying to conquer my anxitey and stress, what I also find really strange, is that Iv'e barely slept and I have more sleep in my eyes then when I was actually sleeping properly, Lilly and my australian friends I can't believe how helpful you guys have been and I am just so grateful guys

Hi David.

It's so good to hear you've calmed down a little.

It's really good to hear!

So you have a plan? You said you know what you have to do now.

I know you're worried about not remembering your day; maybe you could keep a journal type log.

I did that and it helped.

Sorry i forgot to mention it in other posts, but i did mention writing.

I'm glad i could help you by telling you my own experiences. I'm glad you found my input helpful.

I know things can be hard and i know it'll take a bit to get a handle on it all, but i hope you stay in touch and let me know how you're doing...?

Besides, i'd be happy to hear when you complete your masters!

Anytime you want or need me just post and i'll do what i can.

I know you'll be fine tho, but it'd still be good to hear from you.

Take care, David.

Thanks for letting me know you're feeling better.

All the best from your aussie friend haha!

Hey man, I think a jornal is a really good idea, I think there's a lot more I could be doing to help the situation, I'm just wondering when you're sleep problem first statred were you a lot worse at first, and was you're memory affected really bad at first, because this has been going of for a month now for me and eveyday I have felt my memeory fade and fade, thanks so much for all the advice you have given man

Hi David It's good to hear from you! Keeping a journal helps me, especially in the beginning of it all, so i hope it does the same for you. Yes, i was a lot worse when it began but it slowly got better. I still forget things but but it's like 98% better now - the other 2% is age, i think.

You sound calmer, which is great! Anxiety is a horrible thing. The more you let it get to you the more it makes you lose control and then your memories start to vanish.

Once you learn to deal with it better and realise it's fear feeding fear, you'll feel differently about it all.

Glad to hear you're doing much better.

I've been thinking of you and wondering how you're doing.

Don't lose touch, and any help i can give, just ask.

Great to hear from you sounding so much calmer and in control!

All the best??

Hi David, u had vwhat u call tiny blackouts followed by myoclonicjerks so everytime u blackout, u also have myoclonicjerks which jolt u awake every time u fall asleep, I have those and I'm still here.