I Have So Many Reasons To Be Happy! But Im Not :-(

Posted , 3 users are following.

I have had depression for many years off and on and can only think back to when i was single for a year i was at my happiest.. Was living life to the full, dating guys, out alot more and just generally rly positive and content with my life

I have been with my partner for just over a year and we plan on moving in together shortly which is both exciting and scary lol

My boyfriend is a wonderful man thats truley supportive and knows i have these moments of upset, feeling misreble and getting emotional which seems to be happening every other day lately :-( i feel so unhappy, like a shell and just dont feel happy atall and i know that i should feel on top of the world with my younger sister anouncing her pregnancy which is amazing but i cant help but feel so sad and jealous of the whole thing

I have a lovely job, friends and family but i just want to be just quiet left alone in the corner to cry in my misery

My head feels allover the place im constantly worrying and stressing over things and jealous of my boyfriends friends relationships

I just dont feel fulfilled thats the only way i can explain it :-( i was on citalopram 20mg for 8/9 months and weened myself off them for a good couple months.. As doctor and councellor advised.. That was hard but i was fed up of feelin numb on them with no emotions atall was like a robot for months

I dont want to go back on them again after being on them twice now and they just dont agree with me :-/

I feel like im constantly comparing myself my looks my personality to everything and just so fed up of it and just want to just lay in bed and cry for weeks :-( what is wrong with me!!

Im 28 in full time work with amazing family and friends, lost 3 and a half stone in weight on my own for the last 2 years and have a few debt problems that are being sorted through debt management! Which will be paid in few years :-)

I have so much to smile about but im not im misreble! Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated! I know theres many ppl out there in the same boat as me.. I just want to get through this so bad x i want to enjoy life

Jess xx

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5 Replies

  • Posted

    Depression sucks Jess, I have had depression for 16 years but Im the complete opposite from you I have no one Ive chased everyone away.

    Let your friends and family help dont push them away thats the mistake I made.

    Be strong and you will get therebiggrin

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    • Posted

      Thank you for your reply Lynne 

      I'm very lucky I have them and we are all very open and honest which is brilliant 

      I'm just tired of being this way :-( x

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    • Posted

      I know Jess it sucks but try and be strong you are youndg and so much to live for.

      After 16 years pf depression I have just recently got anxiety, so the battle for me continues.

      This is an excellent forum good people and good advice

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    • Posted

      Yeah ive been reading some discussions and they are very helpful x thank you lynne i am rly tryin to just get on with it or snap out of it! What is wrong with me?!! Why cant i be normal like a normal girl my age happy with everything to live for :-(
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